It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Relationship Health Message Board

problem with friend and fiance

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 01-15-2006, 03:24 PM   #1
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 275
Ruby13 HB User
problem with friend and fiance

Hi everyone-

I just got engaged a couple weeks ago, and I'm completely thrilled. The only glitch in my glee is that one of my long-time friends basically said she was "bewildered" that I was doing this. On one hand, I understand her point of view. She's only met my fiance twice since she lives further away than most friends. The first time was fine. The second time we were out at a bar for a holiday and both he and her boyfriend had too much to drink and got into a very stupid verbal argument, the kind that only happens when drunk (e.g. over absolutely nothing). Both the guys were embarrassed and apologized the next day, so I thought we'd all moved past it. She's also been married and divorced and has seen the bad side of marriage.

On the other hand, I'm kind of hurt and annoyed. I've told her all the way along we were talking about it and said many good things about him. I also told her, after that first exchange which was really just through voicemails and then e-mail, that I'd love to talk to her more about it and see why she's having a hard time. She hasn't returned any calls or e-mails in a while.

I don't really understand her behavior. Everyone who has spent time around my fiance and I as a couple have been really supportive of this engagement. No one else has been surprised at all. I can understand that her impression of him is different, but I can't understand why she would react so strongly to a personal decision that I'm making. I feel like she's mad or taking it personally that I would choose someone she doesn't approve of.

I guess I'm just looking for others' perspectives on this. I never fight with my friends, so I don't really know what to make of it.

Last edited by Ruby13; 01-15-2006 at 03:26 PM.

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 01-15-2006, 06:36 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 5,530
SophiaM HB User
Re: problem with friend and fiance

The only thing that comes to my mind is that your friend might be jealous deep down because she would want to be engaged also. I might be way off, but her strong reaction is just too strange, especially that you told her many good things about your fiance. I think that despite the fact her first marriage was bad, she probably wants to experience a good one, and now you have a chance at that while she doesn't. She'll get used to the idea of you getting married--just give her time.

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
HELP! Oxycodone 15mg Dependence Problem!!! mjstewar Addiction & Recovery 4 06-23-2008 11:01 PM
Best Friend Engaged..I'm Jealous Catherine83 Relationship Health 11 01-23-2008 10:28 AM
Update on my newly engaged friend situation... happymom28 Relationship Health 21 01-14-2008 10:53 AM
Geez what her problem?? apple84 Relationship Health 2 10-09-2007 11:28 AM
problem with fiance!!!! Blueeyes Relationship Health 20 06-20-2007 09:10 PM
My Fiancé is stressing I will have problem conceiving Lotus_Blossom Infertility 6 10-29-2006 09:28 PM
Best friend and Boyfriend dont like each other! Need Advice idared04 Relationship Health 5 01-09-2006 02:01 PM
Need advice on problem with best friend Falynsmommy Relationship Health 15 04-03-2004 08:20 PM
Best Friend's Fiance Serendipity24 Relationship Health 23 03-12-2004 03:05 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:29 AM.

Site owned and operated by™
© 1998-2018™ All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!