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    Old 02-27-2006, 06:51 AM   #1
    nanna02
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    Unhappy Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs


    Nothing can describe the relief , at last , I found today to discover my suspicions I've harboured for the last 2 years are absolutley true and correct !

    after many episodes of strange 'outside the home' activities , body language , defensive actions and language towards me, verbal anger ,then fast reversal to put on the charm ,etc..etc..

    I have been confirmed my suspicions are correct ..

    my husband is having an affair !..

    I was put onto a reputable Medium whos' come from years experience overseas , and is working in my hometown with a group of people whom I confided in,

    he rang me today , and after explaining my fears of my husbands' infidelity and maybe that I was wrong , yet my gut instincts had been telling me he was cheating with another person etc..

    All he said was " YES" !

    I said , "you mean he IS having an affair ?"

    he just repeated "YES!" very firmly , then said .. " I will tell you to continue to do what you were going to originally do ,

    -get the Private Investigators to take actions for you , and do it quickly , before you go to the hospital for treatment ..

    ( I have to get an Assessment done on my Spine in march )

    then we discussed further stuff ,.. I felt so relieved and grateful !...seems stupid , doesn't it , that i should feel like that , when it's bad news , but after so long , I just knew he'd just confirmed exactly my inner feelings .

    So tonight , I'm calm , feeling strange, but happy at last , I'm not angry , just wanted to get that nagging feeling out of my head ,..

    " is he , or "Isn't he?"

    So now , tomorrow , I'll start the action , very quietly behind the scenes , to get the proof I need ,

    as when I confronted him nicely at Xmas , asking him if we could talk openly , he denied any involvement with another woman, made excuses for strange things I'd seen ,
    so I had to believe him..

    yet , after a short while , I know he's back seeing her again..
    his demeanor changes , etc.. .. so many things ,

    .. but now I've got an answer I'm not over reacting , I can take action calmly . and will eventually move out of the home, with all my legal tracks covered !!..lawyers etc,

    Have any of you been in this situation after so long married ?

    I have a disability , in a wheelchair 2 years , .. but still completely got all my marbles , and able bodied as much as possible .. no problem ..except for my husbands' attitude of not wanting to talk or confront issues with me . now I know WHY !!!

    Anyone who wants to give me some encouragement , I'd love to hear from you , I need someone to " talk " to..

    It's been 2 years of utter hell living with this terrible conflict inside my brain.. now i can feel at peace inside with this heavy black cloud lifted off my shoulders !..

    ,take action , so I can get through the next challenge !..
    i'd love to hear thoughts from from someone .

    Nanna 02 xxx
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    Old 02-27-2006, 07:05 AM   #2
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Unless you actually have proof, you don't know for a fact your husband is cheating. I am not saying I don't believe in psychics, but this one could have just been telling you what you yourself already seemed sure of. My boyfriend's mom has this friend who sees a psychic regularly, and the psychic told her that her current boyfriend is indeed her soulmate...when, in reality this guy is king of the losers. KING. So you have to take this whole thing with a grain of salt.

    But if YOUR instincts are telling you your husband is cheating - you are in a better position to know than this psychic. If it seems undeniable, confront him again with your feelings and your suspicions. Tell him if he is cheating then you want to be separated...he owes you that. I hope you get to the bottom of all this...

     
    Old 02-28-2006, 03:04 AM   #3
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Thank you for your reply , Gypsy .

    I realise this sounded perhaps a bit far fetched , but there have been 2 years of suspicious activity , and my instincts had gotten very strong ;

    I had a Private Investigator Service all sorted to follow him , to put an end to my suspicions , to make sure I wasn't fooling myself .. or thinking wrongly of him , ...I need 100% concrete proof , so you see I wasn't just going to listen and believe the Medium although he really said enough and proved to me in myself , I'm correct ; ,

    but my husbands' mother died in Nov, which put paid to that service happening .. now , he's doing strange things again, I'm getting into action!..

    So , Time will tell ,Gypsy .. "while the cat's away " ...., as they say ... and I'm going to be away in March for this spinal assessment ..

    So a good time for Pr.Invest..s' to watch for any other " extra curricular "activities going on behind my back !! and then my suspicions will be proven , or disproven with absolute evidence.

    Scary as it sounds and feels !..., I'm taking this action ... I need peace in my heart , not this black cloud of suspicion hanging over me , so what is meant to happen will happen .. Wish me Luck ! I might need it ! .

    Thanks for listening ! Nanna xx
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    Old 02-28-2006, 07:45 AM   #4
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Women's intuition is hard to beat! Get that PI and get your divorce so you can get on with your life! But really though, you can file for divorce without knowing he is having an affair...just the facts that he doesn't treat you right is enough reason for a divorce. Irreconcilable differences is good enough. My BF lived with a woman that refuse to have sex with him, slept in another room, didn't let him touch her for 12 years and still he stayed with her because he didn't know for sure she was having an affair...she was having an affair the entire time they were together come to find out. I mean, did he really need a PI to tell him what was going on? I asked him what he thought her problem was and for what other reason would she be like this? He just said that he tried not to think about it...poor baby! Don't you continue to be a victim like my Sweetie was...he lost 12 years of his life just hoping beyond hope that he was wrong...Noone deserve to be treated like this! Basically she was just using him for a roof over her head. Your husband wants his cake and eat it too!
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    Last edited by keepsgoin; 02-28-2006 at 07:47 AM.

     
    Old 02-28-2006, 09:35 AM   #5
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    FYI - My best friend's boyfriend dumped her and she was devestated. She too went to a psychic and the psychic told her that her boyfriend was still very much in love with her and they would get back together.

    She married someone else. The ex boyfriend never ever looked back and never ever called her again.

    Don't put a whole lot into a psychic. They have a tendancy to tell you what you want to hear.

     
    Old 02-28-2006, 10:00 AM   #6
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    "Psychic wins lottery" why don't we ever hear that? Just curious.

     
    Old 02-28-2006, 06:30 PM   #7
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Hi again, thanks for your replies .

    just to let you know , I'm not relying on the Medium for the answers , he just confirmed my suspicions and told me to get on with the PI to investigate .. so the Medium never got , or wanted anything from me , no money , nothing ..

    it's the PI eveidence I am after , as I could never confront my husband with out proof .. it would be awful , and I still feel bad about doing it , but , like I said , I can't stand living with this stress everytime he goes out the door ..

    I need closure , as another friend said to me , she had the same thing happen to her , she got hold of the 'other woman ' who was being lied to also , and they were both sitting together waiting on the cheating husband when he came home !!

    So see , it can happen , it was my friends' insincts and it paid off for her , but not the way she wouldv'e wanted it to , really .. how ever a happy ending to them , is they're back together .. and happy I think ,..

    me , well , I don't know what is going to happen.. will just have to put my trust in the PIs to do some good detective work .

    I agree , I can get a divorce without going to all this trouble , but i don't want to if he's not doing wrong .. would be awful ..

    So Will keep you up with what happens later .. All my info has just got sent off to the PI a minute ago .. keep fingers crossed for me Ta Nanna xxxx
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    Old 02-28-2006, 09:04 PM   #8
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by nanna02
    it's the PI eveidence I am after ,
    why didn't you just hire a PI?

     
    Old 03-01-2006, 03:53 AM   #9
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Hi Mada ..

    Did you not read all my previous posts saying I was going to hire a PI,?

    ( originally was already talking with one in November last year , but my husbands' mother died , so I had to put the PI on hold for that time )

    the Medium just came along out of the blue , unexpectedly , through a paper article , I never even purposely looked for one , came to talk just by chance ...

    and in this last post I wrote just before yours, I said I had just sent off the email with all info to tell the PI to work on it today . so I have employed the PI, but began the initial talks yesterday;

    The Medium was great , accurate , and I had a lot of faith in what he said at the time , which was exactly ..

    " Begin doing what you were going to originally do last year in November .. get a PI on to it!. smartly .

    and that's what I'm now doing ..

    So I hope you understand why I'm doing it this way and not jumping in to just leave my husband with out having proof of an affair ..

    I have to give him the benefit of the doubt , .. after 35 yrs , that's a long time to be together , so I have to bide my time and tread carefully , not do anything stupid in case i'm wrong about things ,

    and get proper PI evidence ..

    In fact , he was followed tonight !!

    but I won't know any results till tomorrow if anything was seen ..

    I'm feeling a little bit scared , but I'll get thru this .. I'm a strong woman , .. might take a while to get evidence .. who knows ?.. .

    So thanks for your reply Mada , hope this clarified what i am doing ?..
    Kind Regards , Nannna
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    Old 03-04-2006, 11:19 PM   #10
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    I hope you are prepared for the emotional jolt you are going to have when you find out for sure if he has. You might think you are all ready to go on with your life after finding out, but I can tell you from experience that you will be hurt beyond your understanding. Unless you feel nothing for this man, you will be betrayed by someone whom you have loved for 35 years. It won't be a relief.
    My husband slept with another woman just 6 days ago. I found out Wed. I knew that we were not getting along great. Been married 12 years. All the signs were there though. Long nights away, working? Distant from me. Agitated, if I asked questions. Withdrawn. But I believed in our love and marriage and put the blinders on and said everything was fine. Though I really knew. I found them together last Wed. I was not prepared for such pain and hurt. I would have never, ever done that to him. But now the damage is done. He has told me that he did it because he didn't think I loved him anymore. I neglected to give him what he needed physically and emotionally. I now know that that is true. I was angry with him for lots of things over time and just started to withdrawl my love from him. He went elsewhere.
    But through all this pain of the last few days, I cannot live without him and we are talking and he isn't going to have anything to do with her again. It was only one time and he felt awful he said. It was his cry for love from me. Not a way I would have done it, but we are going to go to counceling and work on fixing this.
    I do hope that you are able to deal with what may happen. I wish you the best and I hope that you won't have to feel the way I do right now. I have a long way to go in forgiving him and myself.
    MommaBee

    Last edited by MommaBee; 03-04-2006 at 11:20 PM.

     
    Old 03-05-2006, 02:02 AM   #11
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    There are a great many contributing factors that can look like infidelity. Either way, keeping something from your partner to the point of it changing your relationship is dishonest, but it doesn't necessarily mean there is anther woman.

    I think you should be prepared to find out the truth, either way, from the PI. Knowing what is happening in your husbands life that has caused such a rift may be like opening Pandora's box. It needs to be done, but the answer you find may not be the one you expected.

    If there is no "proof" that he has been unfaithful, then what? What if he's gambling. Or has a secret life. Or is in debt. Or committed a crime. Etc? Are you prepared for any of these? Don't be complacent in your current suspicions, it could lead to greater confusion and heart ache.

    Don't count your chickens before they hatch. I think you're finding comfort in the fact that someone validated your feelings, and not necessarily in the truth. The truth will be found with the help of a PI. Remain open minded.

     
    Old 03-05-2006, 04:50 AM   #12
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    I think you're very smart to get the evidence and get an attorney and everything all lined up before confronting him. If you confront him now, without protecting yourself first, he can deny it, then start hiding assets and covering his tracks to make sure you don't have grounds of adultery and to make sure you don't get what's rightfully yours in the settlement. Good luck, keep taking good care of yourself, and keep us posted.

     
    Old 03-06-2006, 02:51 AM   #13
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Hi all , thanks for your replies .

    just to keep up , I have found out more info , where she lives, it's where he takes his dogs walking everynight !

    ...that I don't know her myself , that she does work at the exact place I suspected long ago , he was avoiding taking me to ALWAYS , I wondered why !,

    so have got the PIs' organised to follow and watch for 2 full days when I go away on 26th March for my spinal Assessment as I'm in a wheelchair , 6 years ongoing problems see..
    I;m sorry whoever said he might have 'other 'problems , as he can't hide money ones , like gambling , as we have our own business and it all comes out on Discs at the bank , I see our personal Bank Statements , as I'm half shares and half with the accounts,..
    he is solely devoted to his hunting . he's got a deep passion , always has all our married life , got the friends and hunting animal heads to prove it .. that's been another thing which I have had to give into him doing , I was mother and father to our 2 kids , as he was always away up the mountains !.. Gambling , no ..money out bank would be seen..
    he is a reputable person , we live in a good country we have little violence , where as you might see that everyday in other countries .. i see the news and can't believe America , for example . what it's like ,.. we are known world wide for our countrys' reputation and everyone wants to come here to live , if that's any example .. so , no.. it's only a Woman who's caught his fancy .. and my medical situation has compounded it for me/him!!..

    There is no blame here , I feel sorry for him that I've put him in this position being in the wheelchair ..
    ( i'll feel sorry more for HER if she doesn't know he's married !!)

    I just want and deserve HONESTY from him, I've done everything i can over all these years to get us counselling , but he doesn't want it..

    I even asked him at Xmas if he wanted another woman cos of my disability with sex , but he said " no!"

    I will be moving out as he doesn't want to move house , to do anything to make life easier for me . I'm isolated , up on a high hill , no friends , no neighbours can get up here , 24 /6 days a week ..

    It's no life to live like this , we've talked , argued and he's promised , but still , nothing done you see.

    I know he doesn't want to leave me , cos he'll lose half the money , and the business , I spoke to lawyer today , explained the situation , she said i can go now , but if I move out for no "obvious " no proof reason , my married daughter will think it's all my fault , and will take her fathers' side ..

    I believe this could happen and that would break my heart yet she knows I care so very much for her and children , .. but I have to have some sort of a life , down on the flat area and meet new friends !!..... the disability people will help me ..

    I know what i'm in for , but have lots of psychological support if I need it ..
    So thank you all , I'll keep in touch when more happens ,,
    Love to All .. Nanna xxx
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    Last edited by nanna02; 03-06-2006 at 03:15 AM.

     
    Old 03-06-2006, 07:12 AM   #14
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    Oh and you better believe that what the lawyer said is so true, if you leave first, you'll look like you're the one in the wrong! This happened to me and my family still will barely talk to me. I never told anyone about any problems in my marriage and everyone thought it was perfect so when I left....everyone thought I'd lost my mind! Everyone has taken my EX's side. On the outside...looking in...I look like I'm the bad guy but they didn't live 24 years in my shoes! They all act like my EX is a Saint!
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    Old 03-06-2006, 09:02 AM   #15
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    Re: Psychic reveals/husbands' cheating after 35yrs

    You need to sit your daughter down with the report that the PI gave you and show her what he has found out. Does she approve of your husband's affairs? If she can see for herself that it is not you just being mad at him, then maybe she will be on your side. It wouldn't be good for her to take sides anyway. Marriages are personal. She doesn't know ALL of the things that you both have been through for 35 years.
    Show her the paperwork. Then move on for YOURSELF! You deserve better too!
    I wish you the best!
    MommaBee

     
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