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Help Im Sad...........

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Old 03-06-2006, 12:44 PM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 1
Help Im Sad...........

Hello. I have been with my boyfriend for a little over a year. I am 24 & he is 20 years old. When we started going out, he had really bad habits, like staying out really late, smoking weed & hanging out with his friends constantly. He barely would call me & it always bothered me. He would talk to me at night on the phone & say he was going to sleep but really go out with his boys. Well, I caught him in his lies about 2 or 3 times & I was on the verge of just leaving the relationship. He cried & begged me to stay with him so I did. He really did change alot. He stopped hanging out with those guys because he realized they were just a waste of time & also they were always depending on him for rides & money. My problem is that since that time, I have had a hard time giving him trust. It has gotten really bad recently because we always fight because he says I question him too much & that it sucks for him because he really isnt doing anything. I dont know why my mind keeps making me think that hes gonna hurt me & betray me. He really is a sweetheart & at times I do feel for him because I feel maybe I am annoying. We have been through so much together.It sucks because I even accuse him of cheating & there has been no reason for me to do that. But for some reason, I feel like hes off with someone else. I dont know why. We live about 25 minutes away from each other, so sometimes I think its the distance. Its so bad now that I always cry & I feel so lonely & deppressed. Sometimes I feel I would be better off not living. I know this is his first serious relationship so at times I feel like im being to hard on him. I really love him & he really says he wants us to be together & build a future with each other. I just dont feel like hes there for me enough lately & he seems to be getting annoyed at how im feeling now. He gets really temperamental about how I feel. Please help me. Thanks everyone.

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Old 03-06-2006, 04:16 PM   #2
Junior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: N.C.
Posts: 47
Micousa HB User
Re: Help Im Sad...........

hey there

I think there may be something going on with the bf but its more towards your fault.
I am not being mean but listen to me.
You said he changed. he obviously changed enough that you could see it.
When you constantly accused and fussed with him after he changed it may have drove him back to it.
"If you have negative thouhts negative things happen"

A one time that actually happened to me.(so you dont think Im sayin things without experience) A lotof people said I was tempermental, fussy and i had a lot of attitude. When I did change I could fight it for a while but people kept "attacking" me so I eventually went back to having an attitude but with more control because i actually started building it up inside.

Well anyways I think you should ride it out well at least until your "feeling" passes or the truth comes out. WHATEVER HAPPENS DON'T BE SURPRISED?

Old 03-06-2006, 04:52 PM   #3
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: SC
Posts: 188
lilmsmagic HB User
Re: Help Im Sad...........

if you continue to accuse and fuss, you know that you are gonna push him away. he doesnt want that, nor does he need that. but, if your gut is telling you something, you might ought to listen. sometimes your head know things that your heart doesnt and vice versa. trust takes a lifetime to gain and a second to lose. so the trust issue is understandable. can you stay with him for years to come feeling the same as you do right now? as far as trust goes? is that how you want to live?

Old 03-06-2006, 05:44 PM   #4
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 337
MysteriousGuy HB User
Re: Help Im Sad...........

BOOO-BOO?? You're sad?!

Sorry but man, your name with you saying you're sad, that's just.....sad. lol

Old 03-08-2006, 01:11 AM   #5
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 261
RiAnne HB User
Re: Help Im Sad...........

it seems as though you have some issues that you need to deal with that really have nothing to do with him. you cannot drag somebody down with your issues. if you need to be by yourself for awhile to deal with your issues then do that.

Old 03-08-2006, 05:20 AM   #6
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: USA
Posts: 1,418
GypsyArcher HB User
Re: Help Im Sad...........

Personally, I think he may be too young for you. He doesn't seem like he is ready (even if inside he feels like he WANTS to be ready) for a serious girlfriend and a serious relationship, especially with someone older and more experienced. It seems like you have way more invested than this guy does. I don't know of too many 20 year olds who really have all of their ***** together. I am not too sure how in the beginning you seriously considered it a relationship. He rarely called you and preferred spending all of his time with his friends. And it doesn't sound like he stopped hanging out with them because of you - but because he realized that they were using him.

I'd say, try to find someone closer to your age who is ready for a relationship - and knows how to treat a girlfriend.
The grass is always greener on the other side...until you get closer and see that it's astroturf~

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