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hello_x 04-05-2006 05:56 AM

Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Well me and my mum has never got on, [COLOR=Red]deleted[/COLOR] when i was younger she would bring diffrent men home evrynight, When i was 17 i met this guy called alex and moved in with him , he was great and he knew aboout my mum and how we dodnt get on, and i thought he didnt like her either that was untill i cought him in bed with my mum on sunday , how disgusting , i wanted to be physicly sick, i just left them and ran downstairs and cried , my mum was saying how its been going on for about 5 months now , how could he do this to me , he kept saying that she ment nufin and it was plain sex, and she was laughing saying i needed to be more like her , i always promised myself when i was younger that id never turn out like my mum, but my bf perfers her. I got all theses messages from him saying that she doesnt mean anythin i do. But today i got a letter throught the post with pictures of her in ber with him , from her she wrote he will never get from me wat he got from her. That was the last tether , i cant belive he would do this to me , i really love him and he knows what i think about my mum , has anyone been in this situation b4 , any advice on wat to do

sandra2005 04-05-2006 06:23 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
hiya, ive never been in that situation, thankgod but i know it must be so hard for you, your poor thing.
Im just goin to be totally honest here so i hope i dont offend you but your 'mother' sounds to me like a total b**ch who doesnt care about anything but herself and her selfish needs...
i mean for a mother to do that to her daughter is just the lowest thing she could possibly do...
then to not even appologise and just RUB it in your face......i actually think there is somthing wrong with her...something mentally wrong.
she doesnt seem to care about your feelings at all. and she obviousley doesnt love him, it was all for selfish reasons.
as for him...well he is a liar , a cheat and just a disgrace of a human being. :rolleyes:
you dont need him, trust me you dont. i know he is saying sorry and saying its you he cares for and you he wants but it obviousley wasnt you he loved and wanted when he was having sex with your mother.
i would say he has all these excuses for you, and especially since he knows what your 'mother' is like from you telling him, he will probably try and make out she pressured him and he never wanted to do it, and he tried to stop, but it will all be lies.
at the end of the day you havent been going around an sleeping with someone twice your age have you? or worse his father?.....No u havent-beause you loved and cared for him.
the best advice myself and anyone can give you is to NOT EVER take him back-no matter what he promises you, cut all contact with him, change your phone number-do whatever it takes to get him out of your life for good,you dont need people like that hurting you and bringing you donw, you can do better.
as for your 'mother', well you already thought badly of her and whatever chances you tried to give her in the past she has just proved the kind of person she is and i think you should do the same for her-cut her out of your life.and by doing that it doesnt sound like you would be missing much anyway, i wouldnt say she was/is a supportive/caring/loving mother might be different had she appologised to you and was at least trying to make it up to you but all shes done is laugh at you and rub your face in her disgusting affair with him.

it will take you time to get over this but there is better oout there for you. just try to spenfd time with friends and talk to people about this....its the only way you will start to feel better.
take care xxxxx

Celestial_Kel 04-05-2006 06:32 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
When I saw this thread, I had to do a double take!! Your mom slept with your BF??? I feel so bad for you sweetie. I have daughters myself, and I would NEVER even think of such a thing! That's got to be the most insensitive thing I have ever heard of. Have you tried sitting down with your mother and just pouring your heart out to her? I know that would probably be hard to do, but she really needs to know how you feel! Please don't ever blame her behavior on yourself. This is NOT your fault...she is your mother, and she should love and respect you so much more than that! Do you think she is somehow trying to compete with you? Have the two of you had issues between you before this? I'm just wondering what on earth would make a mother do that to her daughter. :confused:

~Summer~ 04-05-2006 06:41 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Sorry this happened to you, that is horrible. If my mom did this to me, that would be a very good reason to cut off contact with her....she obviousely has some growing up to do, and feels no remorse for betraying you.

I agree with Sandra, don't take the BF back- ever. If he did it once, he will do it again.

I hope everything works out for you sweetie.

GypsyArcher 04-05-2006 06:46 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Unfortunately, it sounds like your mother and your boyfriend are two people you certainly do not need in your life. You have to leave them both behind and move on, building a better life for yourself.

SophiaM 04-05-2006 10:16 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
[QUOTE=GypsyArcher]Unfortunately, it sounds like your mother and your boyfriend are two people you certainly do not need in your life. You have to leave them both behind and move on, building a better life for yourself.[/QUOTE]

Yes, unfortunately, this seems like the only and best thing to do if you want to have a happy future. Your mother doesn't even deserve this title if she could do something so despicable and hurtful to you. Do you have any other family who could help you? You need to dump this horrible bf of yours and if you're still living with him, PLEASE move out and do not ever talk to or have anything to do with that LOSER. He does not love or respect you--he's just a lowly dog and nothing more. You sound way above both your mother and him.

Gundam 04-05-2006 11:05 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Seems like you have an evil mum and a BF from hell ... & I'm sorry. If financially capable, please move out at once, & don't dare look back. Don't ever see them again, and start a new life. They are so mean ... in fact they are not even human ... I'm speechless ... but please remember and be so proud of yourself because you have been so tough ... if this happens to a weaker person, she might have killed herself already.

They are not good enough for you, in any way. Just leave them and find a better BF; & you don't need a mother of that kind. When you marry your future wonderful BF, his mum will also become your mum. What I really wanna tell you is that there are alternatives.

Take care, and the very best of luck.

hello_x 04-05-2006 12:13 PM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Iv been staying at a friends for now and shes been saying stay fo as long as you need and all my stuff is at his.Iv always known my my mum was capable of bad stuff but this is never this. She knew how much i loved him he knew how much i loved him and i thought he loved me , it seems like all im doing is crying and i really cant take it anymore and fed up with my life alltother.
When my mum sent the photos that just toped it all of because i didnt wanna see them together again . I really do think he is sorry about it , but icould never trust him again , Im gonna see him tonight, because we have got to talk , he said he has got a suprise which i would love and that my mum means nuthin to him but it went on for 5 months , thats what really upsets me, he knew how much i hated her but he still did it. I really do love him and dont know how to cope, even after what hes done ,i still have feelings for him.

eve40 04-05-2006 01:00 PM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
I know you still have feelings for him, but it's time to love yourself more. You deserve so much better. These two are no better then dogs. This is exactly the kind of behavior dogs engage in. But they don't understand the moral implications of their behavior. Human beings do. What your mother did, with the photos, was vicious. Any mother who does that to her daughter does not love her, but sees her as competition.

Gundam 04-05-2006 01:02 PM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Please don't go Hello ... no surprise of his is gonna fix whatever he has done to you, or to your mum, or whatever your mum and he together have done to you, whichever way you wanna describe this pain ...

Just stay completely away from them for a while, then the next time you will see him is to get your stuff back from his. This is the best advice I can give you right now ... His excuse that your mum meant nothing to him, was just so damn lame ... he's a dog ... unfortunate for you, but also fortunate that you haven't found out too late ....

tnmomofive 04-05-2006 02:16 PM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Good grief unbelieveable I cant believe a mother could do that to her daughter and then to rub it in your face absolutely sickening.You have every right to dislike your mother if it was me id stay far away from her.I agree with another poster who said your mother has mental issues id say surely she must.As far as this b/f of yours he doesnt deserve to even speak to you let your mother have him they two peas in a pod.Eeven if he is trying to be with you so what dont think for a second he wouldnt jump right back in the sac with your mother when she calls on him and if not her someone else.Please see that after he done this to you ,which to me is the worst betrayal hed could ever do to you, that you should tell him to kiss your a** and go get bent never to contact you again!I hope you can find happiness I really feel for you this is terrible.

VAUXHALL OMEGA 04-05-2006 05:37 PM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
I'm sorry but what an evil evil mother!! you need to tell her that she does not deserve the title of MOTHER!

As for your boyfriend, show him the door!

When you find a decent loving guy, who wants you, and you only, tell your mum that he wouldn't look twice at her!! not because shes old, but because of the person she is!

Best of luck

hello_x 04-06-2006 01:45 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Iv got all my stuff back , last night me and my friend went round and packed all my stuff , i had all the appoliges in the book, how she perswaded him to and she ment nuthing i do blah, when i went to walk out he then said if i was as adventuress as my mum we wouldnt have this problem, so i done what most girl would have wanted to do in this situation and kicked him where it hurts . I still do love him badly but today im leaving completly and going to my cousins to stay with her, shes lookin for saomone to share her flat with her, thers nuthin keeping me anymore, iv done collage and nuthin keeping me anymore , so i thikn thats what i need to do is get away .

MysteriousGuy 04-06-2006 03:52 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Damn that's [COLOR=Red]a bad[/COLOR] situation you got there

VAUXHALL OMEGA 04-06-2006 04:02 AM

Re: Caught my boyfriend in bed with my mum!!!!!!!!
Well done HELLO X you have done the right thing! [COLOR=Red]deleted[/COLOR]
All I can say, is look at the positive, your mum has done you a favour, as if she had been decent and not slept with him, maybe a few years down the line you would of found out what he was like and that would of been more time wasted!!

This guy is an immature loser, and it has backfired on him big time!

As for your mum, sorry to say, but delete her!

Best of luck to you, you sound like a strong girl, although you probably don't think you are! but the fact you have packed your things, and gone, despite loving him still, shows you have your head screwed on right! I can only assume your like your father!

Good luck

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