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    Old 08-01-2006, 07:15 PM   #1
    Ken-Y
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    I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    It just gets me thinking all the time I see girls complaining about getting treated badly or watching them. I was at work today and this girl I like was arguing with her ex or someone she was talking to. She always seemed upset and kind of irritated every time she talks to him and everyone at work says she gets treated badly. I kind of have some feelings for her and it just frustrated me seeing her upset when someone like me would treat her good and not walk over her. I cant obviously tell her that but thats how I feel. I guess Im just ranting because I see it alot and some girls dont open their eyes and realize someone that can treat them really good is right in front of their face. I guess its their decision anyway since they chose to be with that guy...oh well.

    Last edited by Ken-Y; 08-01-2006 at 07:18 PM.

     
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    Old 08-01-2006, 10:37 PM   #2
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    if you have feelings for her, tell her you can do better than him.
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    Old 08-02-2006, 03:04 AM   #3
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    lol no girl will argue that..
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    Old 08-02-2006, 11:58 AM   #4
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    I agree, tell her - if she's just seeing someone and not married or committed, what can it hurt?

    I see a lot of men getting treated badly, too. Women who are controlling and jealous and possesive - that is just as bad. However, you usually don't see guys crying or showing any emotion over it at all. They just take it and I see it start to degrade their personality. Male or female, NO ONE should act like that or be treated in that way. It's just wrong.

     
    Old 08-02-2006, 01:07 PM   #5
    Ken-Y
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    I would like to tell her but im pretty sure shes not that into me. I wouldnt mind asking her out but shes 22 almost 23 I think and im only 20 going to be 21 in oct. Her ex was 24 i think and he had a good job and they lived together for a while. I think shes looking for someone who could provide more for her. I still live with my mother and sister at home because I am currently going to school. Im not making 40k a year like her ex was at the job I currently have and not an older guy at that. I just wouldnt be able to offer her anything right now that she probably is looking for until I get out of college or find a higher paying job. Im not saying shes completely dependent on him but she likes the security I guess knowing that shes moved out of her house and has a fairly stable income with her b/f.

     
    Old 08-02-2006, 01:21 PM   #6
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    honey age does not matter. Forget about the rest and tell her. You never know if you don't try.
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    Old 08-02-2006, 04:49 PM   #7
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    You say you have nothing to offer her, compared to her ex boyfreind?

    But what about, kindness, respect, love and happiness, and mostly your personality?

    Her ex, may have more money, but it is proof that money doesn't equal happiness.

    Your difference in age is nothing to worry about, her ex maybe 24, but you are obviously mentally more mature.

    I say, ask her out, just for a coffee would be nice.

    She could probably do with a kind ear at the moment.

     
    Old 08-02-2006, 06:11 PM   #8
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Ken-Y
    It just gets me thinking all the time I see girls complaining about getting treated badly or watching them. I was at work today and this girl I like was arguing with her ex or someone she was talking to. She always seemed upset and kind of irritated every time she talks to him and everyone at work says she gets treated badly. I kind of have some feelings for her and it just frustrated me seeing her upset when someone like me would treat her good and not walk over her. I cant obviously tell her that but thats how I feel. I guess Im just ranting because I see it alot and some girls dont open their eyes and realize someone that can treat them really good is right in front of their face. I guess its their decision anyway since they chose to be with that guy...oh well.
    Yeah you see alot of women acting like that but...it's easy to judge when you're not dealing with one every day. You're not hearing his side of the story either.

    Just don't fall into the trap of thinking you can win her over by being the shoulder she can cry on. There's unfortunately alot of women who would rather be with the domineering jerk than the sympathetic nice guy.

     
    Old 08-02-2006, 06:18 PM   #9
    Ken-Y
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Chieftan
    Yeah you see alot of women acting like that but...it's easy to judge when you're not dealing with one every day. You're not hearing his side of the story either.

    Just don't fall into the trap of thinking you can win her over by being the shoulder she can cry on. There's unfortunately alot of women who would rather be with the domineering jerk than the sympathetic nice guy.
    Yea I agree, I made the mistake of thinking that before but I wont let it happen again. Thanks everyone for your replies though

     
    Old 08-02-2006, 07:24 PM   #10
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    You don't need to feel bad for girls (or anyone) who let someone treat them badly. Usually, if a girl is with a major jerk, then she isn't much of a prize herself.

    Quote:
    There's unfortunately alot of women who would rather be with the domineering jerk than the sympathetic nice guy
    Yeah, but - if a woman wants to be with a domineering jerk, then what does that say about her? It's not like all women are these naive, sweet little things that become enthralled and mesmerized by these big, bad men. Women who chose to be in or stay in relationships with total jerks usually have their own combo platter of issues, and therefore not a woman you'd want to be with, anyway. So, you're not missing anything.

    Some women don't WANT to be with nice, stable guys. Why? Because THEY aren't nice, stable women. They crave drama and the up-and-down rollercoaster rush. Or their self-esteem isn't that high. Or they live with the unshakeable belief that they can change somebody, and want a man who is a project rather that one who comes already assembled. Or they're just plain stupid. Either way, they don't want a Mr. Rogers boyfriend.

    I think the nice guys would be doing themselves a favor if they stopped looking at women in bad relationships as poor damsels in distress who need to be saved. The ladies could save themselves if they wanted to. If they WANTED TO, they'd leave the mean, bad-news boyfriend behind, but clearly they are getting something out of the relationship if they are remaining involved in it.

    So, you just need to be on the look out for the "nice" girls who are after what you have to offer, and not worry so much about the girls aren't. Women can't change a bad man, and nice guys can't change a woman who wants to change a bad man. Everyone is just chasing their own tail that way.
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    Old 08-03-2006, 07:48 AM   #11
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    I couldnt agree more Gypsy!

    I didnt like the way I was treated by my ex.. I certainly didnt tell anyone nor did I use it for sympathy. I simply saved my pennies and moved out. I dont want a jerk or to use the situation as a manipulation tool. A lot of women uise their situation as a platform to manipulate others. WEIRD psychology.They certainly ARENT naiive damsels in distress or theyd shut up and get the heck out. I said this earlier... being a single mother and all of the hardships associated with it are by far better than being with a jerk and exposing your kids to that nonsense.

    Mine was Mr nice guy... loving and attentive.. sex was fine. I swear to you after we got married it ALL STOPPED. It was ALL an act. Sex and affection was stopped and used a punishment tool is I didnt follow his rules. Control freak got real when I was moving out and said he didnt tell me the truth about things because I wouldnt have married him.. DANG RIGHT I wouldnt have! LOL!

     
    Old 08-03-2006, 08:47 AM   #12
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by GypsyArcher
    Yeah, but - if a woman wants to be with a domineering jerk, then what does that say about her? It's not like all women are these naive, sweet little things that become enthralled and mesmerized by these big, bad men. Women who chose to be in or stay in relationships with total jerks usually have their own combo platter of issues, and therefore not a woman you'd want to be with, anyway. So, you're not missing anything.

    Some women don't WANT to be with nice, stable guys. Why? Because THEY aren't nice, stable women. They crave drama and the up-and-down rollercoaster rush. Or their self-esteem isn't that high. Or they live with the unshakeable belief that they can change somebody, and want a man who is a project rather that one who comes already assembled. Or they're just plain stupid. Either way, they don't want a Mr. Rogers boyfriend.

    I think the nice guys would be doing themselves a favor if they stopped looking at women in bad relationships as poor damsels in distress who need to be saved. The ladies could save themselves if they wanted to. If they WANTED TO, they'd leave the mean, bad-news boyfriend behind, but clearly they are getting something out of the relationship if they are remaining involved in it.
    for some reason this really makes a lot of sense,

     
    Old 08-03-2006, 11:59 AM   #13
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    Go tell her now.

    I can see this is a typical way to start a romance with a girl. Go for it. Esp if you know you are a much better person than her ex.

     
    Old 08-03-2006, 07:54 PM   #14
    Ken-Y
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    I think shes talking to some other guy now and he works at some strip club but hes not a stripper. Anyway its useless to tell her now if shes talking with him. Thanks for the feedback guys.

     
    Old 08-03-2006, 09:11 PM   #15
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    Re: I hate seeing girls get treated badly...

    Dear Ken-Y,

    This girl you're talking about is obviously still young.

    Do you know the saying, "some girls need to kiss a few frogs before she finds her prince?" Well, this is her frog (from the sound of it) and she may have many more until she realizes that being treated like crap is not the way of life.

    I used to be like this girl, just happy that "any" man paid any attention to me. Then I realized that I don't like feeling unhappy and I made the decision to never be with a man who makes me feel insignificant.

    Maybe you may be feeling this way towards her because you may want to rescue her? Some men do feel that way sometimes and it's not a good foundation for a relationship. I don't like it either when women gets treated badly. With so many women leaders and role models, I'm surprised that so many women are still putting themselves in a bad situation. We have choices and sometimes, some girls choose to stay in a bad relationship. There are some relationships that are harder to get out of, but it's not impossible.

    Be her friend, if you want to and be prepared to hear a lot of her stories that you may not like because you like her.

    Peace.

     
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