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Too much too soon?

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Old 08-20-2006, 01:11 AM   #1
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Michigan
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CUCrusaders24 HB User
Too much too soon?

Hello everyone,

I am 22 and I'm in need of some advice. I have wanted to get back into the dating circuit for a while now. I went out on a date last week with this real nice guy, and it seemed to go well (before and after the goodnight kiss). He seemed shy at first, and even hesistently asked if I wanted to see a movie after dinner, and we did. Up until the first date, we were emailing regularly, he would text me and wish me a good day, and ask if he could call me after work, etc...I was playing it casual and cool with him during the date and everything. I'm not one who goes far with guys I barely know (call me a little old fashioned at times maybe...); the problem is, I feel myself really hoping things will work out with whoever the guy in question may be, and I'm afraid I come off as needy or too strong initially. In the past, I have met men whom I've hit it off with, only to end up feeling used and having it hit me that they didn't want to date me or even take the time to get to know me. I'm afraid its going to be the same with this guy I just went out with...Although he did get back to me after the date last week and said "Sorry I didn't call last night, I got home late from work, I had a good time too..." I let him know I was free to chat this weekend (which was early Sat morning) and he didn't respond, then I was working an overnight shift and was bored, so I called and he didn't answer his phone. I left a message and said I was just calling to say "hello" but then made (what I think was a MISTAKE) a joke and said "I'm not trying to act like a stalker, hehe..." I tried to sound lighthearted in my message, and said that in a joking manner, then said "Bye Bye"...Okay...well anyway, I'm afraid I scared him off...should I wait it out and see if he gets back to me? Would he have said to call him when I want to go out again if he wasn't interested after the first date, or replied and said he had a nice time too?

Any prompt advice is appreciated...thanks!

Last edited by CUCrusaders24; 08-20-2006 at 01:19 AM.

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Old 08-20-2006, 03:34 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Australia
Posts: 579
Baby_hands HB User
Re: Too much too soon?

You've intiated contact with it is upto HIM to respond at this point. You left a message on his phone so there is no excuse.

Please..whatever you do..dont contact him will look too eager.
Great beauty and virtue rarely dwell together.

Old 08-20-2006, 11:11 AM   #3
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 264
BetsyJean HB User
Re: Too much too soon?

Hi CU!!!
You are in luck! I have been where you are, and the answer to your dilemma is:

The Right Guy

Because when its time, and you meet the Right Guy, you won't have to be anyone but yourself!!
Til then, you can worry all you want, but what I found out was:

Be yourself from the start, and if it works out you won't have to be someone you're not for the rest of your life!

Can you imagine the problem being who you think some guy wants you to be, and then having to BE that person that you're not - forever??

I didn't meet my right guy until I'd been dating 13 more years than you have so far... And it was worth the wait because I don't have to EVER worry if he likes me for who I am, because I was ME from the start!!

Old 08-20-2006, 12:55 PM   #4
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Michigan
Posts: 41
CUCrusaders24 HB User
Re: Too much too soon?

Thank you. I'm thinking maybe I should forget about the whole thing with him. I called him last night at 11 PM (when I left the message on his phone, as I said in my initial post) and haven't heard anything, so I'm thinking maybe I have my answer. It hurts yes, because who wants to be rejected, but I don't want to be in another situation where I am kidding myself.

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