It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Relationship Health Message Board

BF doesn't want it

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 08-24-2006, 09:07 AM   #1
Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Dallas, TX USA
Posts: 14
Insecure_JL HB User
Question BF doesn't want it

I have been with my BF for 6 years and he never want to do it. I have already been down a list of about 1000 things it could be, but NONE of them apply. I have even asked if maybe something medically is wrong and he says no to that too. I just don't get it, and it is getting to the point where I soak up all male attention I can get elsehwhere. I have not and would not cheat, but I feel harmless flirting is all I have to get by these days, and I am only 25. My BF is 26. Does any other woman out there have a guy like this? And if so, could you shed any light? Is it wrong to enjoy attention from other guys when you are not getting it at home?

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 08-24-2006, 04:53 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 1,538
keepsgoin HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it

So why do you stay with someone that doesn't want to have sex with you? The only light I can shed is what happened in my BF's past relationship with a woman that he lived with for 12 years that would never have sex with him...he kept on staying with her...didn't want to leave her high and dry I guess but when the truth finally came out, she was having an affair with an EX of her's that whole entire time and the reason she didn't want to have sex is because she was in love and having sex with that other guy. My huge question to him that he really can't figure out himself is why in the hell would someone stay with a person that didn't want them to touch them? Weird!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wouldn't expect him to stay with me if I showed him no affection for pete's sake!
I tells it likes a sees it
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Last edited by keepsgoin; 08-24-2006 at 04:54 PM.

Old 08-24-2006, 08:18 PM   #3
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 69
caladbolg HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it

Do you do other stuff at least? I mean, everything but sex? Is he still a virgin? If not.. then maybe a big red flag. If so, then maybe he just wants to wait? You're saying that he gives no explanations at all?? Very very strange!

Old 08-24-2006, 10:18 PM   #4
Senior Veteran
rosequartz's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Chicago,IL
Posts: 11,209
rosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it

yeah, why have you put up with it for 6 years?
are you sure he's your boyfriend? maybe he's your friend or your roommate and you've misjudged the relationship?
maybe he's gay and you're his "beard"
whatever it is, it's not a healthy relationship......what are his reasons?

Old 08-25-2006, 03:54 AM   #5
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,501
KeltoKel HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it

I'm sorry, but it isn't normal for a 26 year old man to not want sex. Either there is something wrong medically or he is depressed - assuming he isn't gay or having an affair. Either way, it is ONE of those b/c going without sex at tht age isn't normal behavior.

Old 08-25-2006, 04:55 AM   #6
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Lagos, Nigeria
Posts: 176
minijumbofly HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it

Hmmm. Platonic love with a 26 year old male.
I think you had better back track and double check that list of 1000 things that didn't apply. I'll bet you got more than a few wrong answers on them.

But frankly, it doesn't really matter why. If he is not providing what you want and need, just move on. Gosh, 6 years is a long time for improvements that never came.

How many more years are you willing to spend or waste?

Old 08-25-2006, 05:08 PM   #7
Senior Veteran
Join Date: May 2006
Location: kent
Posts: 1,435
brook65 HB User
Re: BF doesn't want it


I had to respond here. Have you asked him if he is A SEXUAL, meaning someone who doesen't need, desire, or want sex!

These types of people don't choose to be this way, anymore than someone who is straight or gay! to them, the way they feel is normal.

These people do still fall in love, have emotions, also some if not all still like affection, but just do not have the desire or need to carry the affection onto sex!

If this guy is A SEXUAL, than he should already know he is, I am assuming that because you have stayed, he probably feels you have accepted him for how he is, without him having to announce his sexuality.

If he is A SEXUAL, then he probably can't understand or identify with your need for sex.

This situation after six years probably won't change, as if he had some problem with sex, if he missed having a sexual relationship, he would seek help.

I feel sad for you here, and I think maybe at your young age, you should start to think realistically about your future! You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting what afterall is very normal.

Best of luck

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Boyfriend Doesn't Want Sex, But Masturbates. ssstephanie Sexual Health - Women 8 03-10-2010 07:16 PM
He doesn't like to be seen with me around female friends Kazinsky Bipolar Disorder 7 01-07-2010 06:10 AM
My boyfriend has Social Anxiety but doesn't want to get help lovinggf Relationship Health 17 11-17-2009 02:28 PM
my new girlfriend doesn't want me to visit my 2year old at my x-wifes place davidh30 Relationship Health 20 09-23-2009 03:27 PM
why doesn't he want to marry me? Sillygrl Relationship Health 30 02-02-2009 11:37 AM
BF doesn't like any of my ideas sognoazzuro Relationship Health 7 07-22-2008 06:36 AM
My husband doesn't sleep in the same bed with me, help! UnluckyInLove Sexual Health - General 9 02-18-2008 09:01 AM
Sister doesn't want help for acne! Cassie4u22 Acne 21 07-17-2005 06:31 AM
Need Advice: Grandparent Going to Nursing Home and Doesn't Want to Go morninglorylf Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia 3 04-21-2005 04:08 PM
My husband doesn't want to have sex much anymore sapphire9383 Sexual Health - General 5 01-21-2005 01:24 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:12 AM.

Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
© 1998-2018 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!