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Just looking for POVs

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Old 09-19-2006, 03:34 PM   #1
Join Date: Sep 2006
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eastcoast52 HB User
Question Just looking for POVs

This summer my boyfriend's mother went through my wallet, stole a few things from me, and lied to me about trivial things to make herself look good.

I asked my boyfriend to speak with his mother about boundaries and privacy. I asked him to ask his mother to start taking her medication instead of giving it away to her friends/business colleagues. He told me that I should talk to her and he walked away; he did this several times. I told him he wouldn't want me to confront his mother because she would have one of her episodes. I will not sugarcoat anything for a grown woman who is aware of what she is doing. He still has done nothing. I confronted her once and she avoided me for three days. I had to reinitiate communication between us.

This summer my boyfriend and I went to the mall. He ran up to me and started jumping up and down slightly and with an excited voice kept asking me if I knew who was working at the store. I turned around and didn't know who was working at the store and he said, "It's her. It's ____" This is a girl that he has had an obsession over since high school; for about four to five years now. That I didn't think he still had feelings for but since some other things have happened I know otherwise. I just walked away because I didn't know what to say. Then he flirted with her. I walked out of the store.

I talked to him about this and he yelled at me. He didn't listen to what I wanted to say about the situation and he yelled at me and started blaming me for things.

Since August my boyfriend has been displacing his frustration and agreession onto me. I talked to him about this and he has done nothing and blames it on me.

Who I am in all this: I try to be logical. I try not to let my emotions get the best of me. Sometimes I come across as thick-skinned and stubborn when I know I am right. If I am unsure about something I'll admit to it.

I'm thinking about ending our relationship. The petty bickering everyday is too much drama for me. Him threatening to commit suicide is effecting my normal school and work life.

What are some of your thoughts?

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Old 09-19-2006, 04:25 PM   #2
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Destea HB User
Re: Just looking for POVs

Cut and run, girl. This is a boy, not a man, and it sounds like he may have some the same instabilities as his mother by his actions. I can't believe he acted like that about some old crush TO YOU. Ouch!

Don't take less than what you deserve. Honestly, I don't really like telling people to leave their relationships, but this doesn't sound like an equal or open partnership - and he doesn't seem to be growing up. How long have you been dating? I can't believe his mother stole from you and he refused to say anything! That is not healthy ... my sympathy to you!

Old 09-19-2006, 06:30 PM   #3
Join Date: Sep 2006
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eastcoast52 HB User
Re: Just looking for POVs

We have been together for 2 years. This strange behavior didn't start until last year though. And it didn't get real bad until this summer when we were around his family.

And now he has new behaviors. Like I don't think there is anything wrong with hugging pillows, but he NEVER use to cuddle with pillows and now he cuddles with pillows and puts his back to me at night.

Old 09-20-2006, 01:44 PM   #4
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Re: Just looking for POVs

yep cut and run.....and also the acorn doesn't fall far from the tree.

what kind of values could his mother have taught him?
She's a liar and a thief.....

lesson? always look at someones explains a lot, and will save a lot of grief.

Old 09-20-2006, 02:42 PM   #5
Join Date: Sep 2006
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eastcoast52 HB User
Re: Just looking for POVs

Yeah. I always look to people's parents. But we never spent a lot of time with his family until this summer, and it was crazy.

I find it truly sad that her children don't feel they can talk to her without her talking about herself or her not really listening to them.

I knew before she did that one of them was doing poorly in school and I tried to tell her and she denied it until the report card came and yelled at him. She could've helped him when I told her but she just keeps getting mad when I mention things to her.

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