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Why do I let people walk all over me?

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Old 10-03-2006, 11:45 AM   #1
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 197
JBravo223 HB User
Angry Why do I let people walk all over me?

Am I too nice? When we were talking about getting back together and she was asking "what are you going to buy me for my birthday?", "can I borrow $160?", "can we have an open relationship?", "you killed my dog?" I didn't say anything back. I should have stood up and said "F*** YOU B****" and walked away. I wanted to say that but was afriad to hurt her feelings even though she had no regard for mine.

Last edited by JBravo223; 10-08-2006 at 06:38 PM.

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Old 10-03-2006, 12:00 PM   #2
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Veronica_Mars HB User
Re: Why do I let people walk all over me?

Definitely don't call her or her sisters, that will just drag you back into the whole mess and prevent you from moving on. It's not like it's going to change anything with her or change the way things turned out. However, you should definitely not forget about all this--instead, use it as motivation to act differently in future relationships. You need to stand up for yourself and never allow yourself to be treated poorly, or else you will always end up with someone who walks all over you. But no one can do that unless you let them, so make sure this is the last time! Good luck.

Old 10-04-2006, 12:16 AM   #3
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BlueFira HB User
Lightbulb Re: Why do I let people walk all over me?

I think I read somewhere that your personality allows you to attract a certain type of people. That is not to say you're weak or anything... maybe you're the type that doesn't want to say no. At least you know you have the habbit of being walked all over. That's a very important first step. You should figure out how you can change that and give yourself the choice of what to do in a situation instead of being control.

As for your ex-gf/gf and her family... just move on. She obivously see that part of you and want to take advantage of you. You should be able to find a nice girl that won't ask you for money and other material things to trade for her affections.

Old 10-04-2006, 11:25 AM   #4
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galinaqt HB User
Re: Why do I let people walk all over me?

I am also "soft" person, I've heard a lot "you can't stand up for yourself". You can learn it to some degree. I found myself happy in environment when I don't have to do it or almost don't have to do it.
Find a descent woman you comfortable with and drop once you don't. If choice is to be alone or with a wrong person, be alone.
My aunt told me that her first husband told her: "Not just me but anybody you will live with wll put his a.. on your head". She often complained about her second husband using her, but she found a lot of things about him she likes, he wasn't as bad as first one for sure and did a lot of good for her and her kids.

Old 10-04-2006, 12:41 PM   #5
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ravadelia HB User
Re: Why do I let people walk all over me?

Standing up for oneself does not mean cursing and calling someone names. No one can use you unless you let them. Being firm,learning to say no and being able to walk away with dignity intact is the the adult way to stand up for yourself !

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