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  • EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

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    Old 09-17-2007, 11:28 PM   #1
    kkmom
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    Question EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Hello, I know most of you know my story, so I wont repeat it. Bur , get this my ex's new girlfriend is pregnant, mind you they have been only dating about 6 weeks. Now, thats just crazy. I know its bad for me to talk to him still, but I try to be cordial without harsh feelings you know and also because we attend the same church. I really can care less about her pregnancy, he wantrd a kid and I guess she was willing to give him one, even though it is way too soon in their relationship. The thing that gets me is that he is going to propose to her and guess what with the ring I had, the one I wore and picked out myself. It will feel akward to see them at church, I admit I am a little hurt, because it is so soon after our breakup. Also, he does not want me to tell her that the ring was mine and she does not know we were ever engaged. So guys what do I do just stay cool and sit back and watch. Mind you I dont want him and I dont know why I am still so called friends with him. I have moved on and I am dating, there is one guy that I am dating that I really like, but I dont want to rush a relationship yet. Thanks

     
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    Old 09-18-2007, 03:03 AM   #2
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    I realize that a lot of people think being friends with your ex is a good thing, but in your case(as in most) it's obviously not. You say you don't care, but you're here posting about him and his new girlfriend. You should limit yourself to being polite at church and that's it. What good could come of you interfering in his new relationship by telling his fiance about the ring? Do you want to prevent him from marrying this pregnant woman and deprive the child of a father? Step back and cease communication with him and give yourself a chance with new relationships and him a chance with a new family.

     
    Old 09-18-2007, 05:59 AM   #3
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    He's given her your ring...that's just so wrong...isn't there a law against that? HAHAHAHA!

    Don't even try and figure out what a man does after they break up with a woman. It's like they freak out or something. My Ex husband, who was very set in his ways about the way he thought about stuff, is now remarried to a woman that has everything going for her that he hated? If I tried to figure it out I'd loose my mind! This woman is PG after they've dated for 6 weeks? How could she even really know it so soon? HA! Did she get PG on the first date? MY MY! Wouldn't be too surprised if she is PG with someone else's child. All you can really do is be polite when you see them at church. You certainly don't have to be their friend.
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    Old 09-18-2007, 06:02 AM   #4
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Im sorry that is just trashy that she doesnt know he was engaged and that she is getting a left over ring. How gross is that?? Sorry he is keeping secrets from her and that is wrong on so many levels when he is going to marry her.
    She should know about the ring and it should be up to her whether she accepts it or not.
    I dont see anything wrong with being friends with exes as long as both parties are well aware of the rules and follow them.
    Im still hung up on him passing the ring off to her without her knowing that it already has a history. Most women would be appalled at that. If she doesnt find out til after they are married she is going upset. I wont be the least bit surprised if he finds it thrown at him.
    I know you say you dont care but urge him to be honest with her. She is carrying his kid after all and deserve at least that much respect from him to be honest. He needs to let her know he was iengaged before and that the ring was picked and worn by you.
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    Old 09-18-2007, 06:05 AM   #5
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    I agree, be cordial to them at church and leave it at that, that's how far your "friendship" should go. And no, I don't think it's your place to tel her about the ring. I do feel sorry for her, though, he obviously doesn't care about her enough to even trade in your ring for one of her own. But that's her problem, not yours. You may be a "friend" but your main role here is ex girlfriend. If you told her about it, it would just make you look vindictive and jealous. IT's not your place, so just leave it.

     
    Old 09-18-2007, 06:11 AM   #6
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kkmom View Post
    The thing that gets me is that he is going to propose to her and guess what with the ring I had, the one I wore and picked out myself. It will feel akward to see them at church, I admit I am a little hurt, because it is so soon after our breakup. Also, he does not want me to tell her that the ring was mine and she does not know we were ever engaged. So guys what do I do just stay cool and sit back and watch. Mind you I dont want him and I dont know why I am still so called friends with him. I have moved on and I am dating, there is one guy that I am dating that I really like, but I dont want to rush a relationship yet.
    Sit back and watch the mess unfold that he created.

    First, his proposal will be based on a pregnancy. That almost never works out, especially given they have known eachother 6 weeks.

    Second, he is giving her the ring he proposed to you with! What kind of guy does that? No wonder he doesn't want you to say anything. He knows that any self respecting woman would throw it back in his face.

    Third, he is lying about the fact he was engaged to you. That is going to come back and bite him in the *** big time. What is the big deal about telling her the truth, especially when he plans on marrying her. Oh yeah, then she might suspect that this was your ring.

    I have to agree that you probably shouldn't maintain a friendship with this guy. When the **** hits the fan in this relationship (and he really is paving the way for this to happen) he is going to need a scape goat. Do you want to deal with a ****** off pregnant woman who's fiance lied to her about being engaged to you?

    You don't want him, you don't need him, and you are moving on with your life. Keep going in that direction. Obviously when you see him at church you can say hello and what not. I just wouldn't go out of my way to talk to or be friendly with him. You don't need the inevitable drama that is brewing in that relationship.

     
    Old 09-18-2007, 10:18 AM   #7
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    don't worry, they'll be divorced (if they even get married), and she'll be a single mom soon, tied down with a snot nose brat, and you'll still have your freedom!
    Sweet!

    Last edited by rosequartz; 09-18-2007 at 10:19 AM. Reason: added "snot nose"

     
    Old 09-18-2007, 10:22 AM   #8
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Keep right back from him and his girlfriend. Keep right back. There will be an explosion soon and you dont want to be near it.
    Simply say hello if you come face to face at church, but leave it at that. Look after yourself. Goodluck.

     
    Old 09-18-2007, 02:09 PM   #9
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Well I didnt say she had to be the one to tell her that she was engaged to the guy or that the ring was once her's. I simply stated that the current gf should know the facts. He is lying to her from the get go. Like others have pointed out the pregnancy news seems a bit off with the time frame. So it could be a case of both are lying to each other.
    Be polite to him in church and leave it at that.
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    Old 09-18-2007, 08:44 PM   #10
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Hi all, thanks for your response, I dont know if I mentioned to you that this idiot called me on friday night at 2 am and was talking about he still loves me and wanted to come over. I was like heck naw! He said they got into an arguement not my problem. But, it did leak that he is talking to other females and making plans on seeing at least one of them. If you knew how I got this info you may say i am scandalous, but I have my ways/ I know this is not good though. But I feel sorry for this woman she dont know what she is getting her self into and no.no.no will I tell her anything. He is upset tht I decided to stay at the church he thought I would leave after the break up, not. So he has not been to church in months, I know he has to be ashamed me and him was just in marriage consouling before and now he is going to show up in there again with a different female. Yes, guys I still have a tiny amout of care for him, but I am dusgusted and how he treated me towards the end and what he is doing now. His head got big after his gastric bypass, now he thinks he is God. gift to women. He told me they will marry in january, oh well. I thank God for revealing this crazy man to me before I married him.

     
    Old 09-19-2007, 06:09 AM   #11
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    Like another poster said, just sit back and enjoy the fireworks. I had an ex 10 years ago whom I broke up with...I had just met someone new, and 3 weeks later he wanted to get back. I said, look, you've had four years to make up your mind about me, the least you can do now is give me the summer to figure out if this new guy is going to work out. Well, he promptly knocked up another girl that month! Nice! Their relationship was a DISASTER! Even though I was a little bothered at first, I later found it amusing. It's natural to have the feelings your having, but I wouldn't advise being friends with him. I found it bothersome to hear about his new son, regardless of the status of their nuclear relationship. Besides, he's not much of a friend if he thought you should leave your church after the breakup. Without any regard to your spiritual growth or the friends you've made there, he merely didn't want you there because he knew you'd figure out that they were likely doing the deed before your break up, or he was concerned that she would learn of the ring. He asked you to leave that church for purely selfish reasons and sounds like a creep!

    Last edited by vintagegirl; 09-19-2007 at 06:11 AM.

     
    Old 09-19-2007, 06:13 AM   #12
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    It really is too bad that this woman has no idea what she is getting herself into. Unfortunately if you say anything it will come back around on you through his male smooth talking and who needs that?

    No doubt he is embarrassed to show up with another woman after going through counselling there with you. He should be! Obviously his life would have been easier if you just stopped going there, but why should you change your routine to suit him? He's a big boy. It's time for him to suck it up and deal with the mess he is creating. None of it is your problem anymore.

    Lucky for you you saw this man's true colors before you got married. So many women aren't so lucky or ignore them completely. The nerve of him calling at 2am expecting you to come over and comfort him (or whatever he had in mind). His ego must be the size of Texas!

    Last edited by happymom28; 09-19-2007 at 06:15 AM.

     
    Old 09-20-2007, 03:56 PM   #13
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    Re: EX Fiancee's new girlfriend pregnant

    You all are so right, and he is still calling me every day, trying to be in my business about who I am dating. I told him to stop calling me, and i think I might have to block his number. He called today asking some questons about the ultrasound she took today. Why do I need to concern myself with them. When I had my daughter I had no one but my parents. He figures because i am a nurse that I have the answers to all medical questions. Its not his place to call me and really I think he is doing all of this to throw it up in my face. He is one trifflin(sp) man. Women please stay away from the smooth talking brother who is in too much of a rush to be in a relationship, be part of your familt, want you to have his baby and want to get married quick. Thats how he was, and even though my family knew he was about nothing it took me a while to realize I cant stand him and he is no good for me!

     
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