It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board

  • My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 10-22-2007, 08:07 PM   #1
    alexa829
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    alexa829's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Oct 2007
    Location: NJ USA
    Posts: 21
    alexa829 HB User
    Exclamation My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

    On Dec. 1st,2007 my boyfriend and I will be together for 4years. On Jan. 14,08 he is leaving to go to bootcamp and tech school for the Airforce. We have been living with each other for 2 years and this is our first time apart. He will be returning toward the end of the summer. I cannot stop crying as i see the days are getting closer. How can i begin to cope with a life i can now call the beginning of lonliness for i know this is only the beginning of us being seperated. As i have heard from many military wives the airforce life entails alot of absence from each other....what can i do so that in january it is not soOo hard??

     
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 10-22-2007, 08:32 PM   #2
    dodedoo
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Jun 2006
    Location: New York
    Posts: 292
    dodedoo HB User
    Re: My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by alexa829 View Post
    On Dec. 1st,2007 my boyfriend and I will be together for 4years. On Jan. 14,08 he is leaving to go to bootcamp and tech school for the Airforce. We have been living with each other for 2 years and this is our first time apart. He will be returning toward the end of the summer. I cannot stop crying as i see the days are getting closer. How can i begin to cope with a life i can now call the beginning of lonliness for i know this is only the beginning of us being seperated. As i have heard from many military wives the airforce life entails alot of absence from each other....what can i do so that in january it is not soOo hard??
    Being with a man in the military is a whole different lifestyle. You have to know that he loves you even though he is distant. It is very important that you support him in his endeavor. You may find that it is something that you personally cannot deal with, or you may just become used to it. You need to cherish the time that you are with him. Once he is away, every time that you get in contact with each other will be that much more special. I'm not sure if you knew he wanted to be in the Air Force before you all get together or if it was more of a suprise to you. Seriously just live in the moment and enjoy all of the time that you two get to spend together. Don't waste time being upset about it because that day WILL come where he has to leave. Prepare yourself mentally for it.
    __________________
    live your life with arms wide open

     
    Old 10-22-2007, 09:00 PM   #3
    alexa829
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    alexa829's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Oct 2007
    Location: NJ USA
    Posts: 21
    alexa829 HB User
    Re: My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

    thank you very much for responding so fast. i have always known he wanted to join it was a joint decision. his father served 22 years in the Airforce and his brother did 2 years in the Marines before he passed away. I support him in his journey i just dont know how to deal with the lonely nights??...noone by my side as i sleep. No one to wait for to get home from work. talk about an empty house.. Its just gonna be a big change in lifestyle.

     
    Old 10-23-2007, 05:23 AM   #4
    Blastoff9600
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Blastoff9600's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jul 2002
    Location: Louisiana
    Posts: 3,307
    Blastoff9600 HB UserBlastoff9600 HB User
    Re: My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

    I have been an Air Force wife for almost 13 years. Right now my husband is serving a year in Korea. he is actually here on his midtour which this week is the last. He goes back next Monday to finish up the last four months. There have been lots of time away from him. But this time has been the longest and I swear it has been harder on him than me. He has hated this time so much. So even though it will be hard on you it will be hard on him as well. Granted he will be kept busy but that doesnt mean he wont going to an empty bed(smaller but still empty).
    The first time apart I cried alot the week he was leaving and the first two weeks he was gone. But I had a toddler and school to deal with so I didnt have a lot of time to wallow in self pity. So my crying was done at night in our empty bed.
    Dealing with the empty house and loneliness is a personal thing. I dont know of a single wife or gf that deals with it the same. Yes we all cry but to go to the empty bed and to get up alone we each figure out our own ways of cooping.
    With Basic he wont have a lot of time to contact you but writing letters to him will help you pass the time and give him something to read when he does have a few minutes to himself. Tech school he will have more time to talk to you and either email or write you.
    Since you dont have kids then you might want to look into a pet. I know sounds odd but then the house wont be so empty and you can share the bed with that pet. If a pet isnt an option then look into somethings you have been wanting to do but havent had the time. Catch up on some reading or a new hobby. You can also plan out more time with friends. Or look into things you are interested in. You can also use the time to plan things for when you two are back together. That way you can surprise him with special moments.
    As for it being the beginning of your lonely time that isnt always true. Depending on his career field depends on how much time he will be either deployed or tdy and the base he is stationed at. Some bases and career fields have a higher deployment/tdy rate than others. So dont count your time alone time just yet.
    Another thing during Tech school he will find out where his first station(base) he wont have much choice in that matter so chances are you will have to move shortly after he finishes Tech school if you plan on still living together after he finishes that.
    It seems like a huge issue but trust me you do adjust and you figure out how to cope. For me and Dh we found that the time apart gives us the chance to see how much we mean to each other. In other words we dont fall into the trap of taking advantage of what we do have or forgetting how we truly feel about each other. Our time apart keeps our eyes and hearts open to each other. Also we joke that the first two weeks back together is like mini honeymoons for us. Actually many couples have that joke and friends and family tend to back off for that reunion time....lol
    It wont be easy but you will adjust and get use to it. It just takes time and an open mind.
    Good luck.
    __________________
    Married 3/25/95
    DS 13 yr
    DS 8 yr (3+ yrs ttc)
    TTC #3 since 01/02

     
    Old 10-23-2007, 07:14 PM   #5
    alexa829
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    alexa829's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Oct 2007
    Location: NJ USA
    Posts: 21
    alexa829 HB User
    Re: My boyfriend is leaving to the Airforce in 2 1/2mnths and IM GOING CRAZY

    when i talk to airforce wifes who have years experience in this field i feel sooo much better. I do have a son he is going on four. When i started talking to my boyfriend i was only talking to him on the phone for two weeks never had a date or any thing and i found out that i was pregnant by my exboyfriend. my boyfriend stayed with me throughout it all and was there for the pregnancy and all. My son calls him by his first name but they treat each other like father and son. We plan on getting married after tech school and then my son and i will be going to whereever he is stationed at. He is going for the security forces job so dont really know if that entails alot of separation time.... Hope Not ....

     
    Closed Thread

    Related Topics
    Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
    My boyfriend has Social Anxiety but doesn't want to get help lovinggf Relationship Health 17 11-17-2009 02:28 PM
    Me again, same Boyfriend, new issue.. jess86 Relationship Health 9 05-07-2009 09:06 AM
    please help with boyfriend! im driving myself insane sperro Relationship Health 3 01-06-2009 11:48 AM
    Fiance just left to Airforce BMT... Going crazy alexa829 Relationship Health 10 01-24-2008 09:45 AM
    I'm in love with a girl whose boyfriend is a friend of mine Jack Smith Relationship Health 109 08-15-2007 01:24 PM
    Boyfriend never wants to see me jessica129 Relationship Health 5 11-04-2005 06:27 AM




    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is Off
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:28 AM.





    © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!