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Feeling Vulnerable and insecure in new relationship....

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Old 01-08-2008, 08:42 AM   #1
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Feeling Vulnerable and insecure in new relationship....

I have been in a new relationship for about a month. And things happend fast. We have a huge amount in common, want the same things in life , and think very much alike. Which is great . He said he loved me very quick and I felt the same, we just clicked so well. He is a good person and makes me happy. We have spent alot of time together..Now he is very spiritual and deep...and smart.. he thinks alot. So the other day I took him to a spot where I go to think sometimes.. he liked it and thanked me for bringing him there. He was quiet the rest of the day .I asked why he said he was thinking about philosophical things nothing bad. I work at the same company as him.. I work in the office and he in the plant. He came by to see me yesterday to see how my day was. And then went ahhh well tonight I want to just stay home and take it easy. I said OK . But I sensed something was not right...I could be just paranoid... but my gut has never been wrong. I did ask on the weekend if I was overwhelming him or smothering him and he said no, not at all. And said he would tell me if that was the case. I am not wanting to say how I am feeling cause I don't want to come off as insecure. Any idea's? I am the type who hates feeling vulnerable, I have been very hurt in the past by someone who was abusive.. so I am on edge. This was over a year ago.

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Old 01-08-2008, 09:00 AM   #2
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Re: Feeling Vulnerable and insecure in new relationship....

I am right here with you! Read (Why is it so hard to talk to men) I have been talking to this guy for a couple of months. No 'I love you' but that’s okay. I'm not ready for that right now but I do understand what you are feeling. Your relationship with this man seemed to happen really fast. This doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing. He could be 'the one', you never know. Just take your time from here on out. Give both of your heads time to process this new comment because it really is a big responsibility and a big decision to 'be' with someone. IMOP Just give it time and refrain yourself from seeming needy. I have to keep telling myself, "Let him miss me, let him call me" and sometimes I give n. Just give it time.
Time does not heal. It simply provides distraction.

Old 01-08-2008, 09:38 AM   #3
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Re: Feeling Vulnerable and insecure in new relationship....

You guys have only been dating for a month and have been spending a lot of time together, right? Maybe he just needs a night to himself. I am one who needs my alone time and if I don't get it for a while I get a little crazy.

Honestly, don't read to much into it. If this starts becoming a habit (like he does this for next few weeks) then I would begin to wonder if something is going on. Otherwise, just enjoy an evening to yourself. There is something to be said for a glass of wine and a good book!

Old 01-08-2008, 10:23 AM   #4
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Re: Feeling Vulnerable and insecure in new relationship....

Well I guess cause we spent and he also wanted to spend so much time with me, for him to go umm I am going to take it easy tonight was odd. I did my own thing @ home. But I wish I could shake this pattern of thinking something is wrong all the time... I have always been like that.

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