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Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

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Old 08-10-2008, 06:43 PM   #1
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Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

My boyfriend and I started dating about 4 months ago...Everything's great, but I go back to college 1-2 hours away for my last year which i know is not THAT far, but it still bothers me that I'm going back and won't be seeing him as much as I have all summer. I leave in 2 weeks and we started seeing eachother when I only had one week left of school this past school year, so we've had all summer together without being long distance...and I know the "whats meant to be will be" and "if its supposed to work out it will" etc...sick of hearing it...but I'm worried as to what he may be thinking about the whole thing....He's not acting different or anything....but he's been bringing it up alot lately the closer the day comes when I go back up to school. He says things like "2 more weeks of summer left huh" and "your leavin me in in a couple weeks" etc. I don't know whether he's worrying alot about it and it might come to the point wgere he may not want to be with me once I move back up to school or if he keeps bringing it up to show me that he's nervous/concerned I may not want to continue to see him when I go back, which is definitely not the case...I can't tell if he's hopeful or not about it....I do come home from school once or twice a month anyway on the weekends, but like I said, it's gonna be different because we will not be seeing eachother nearly as much as we did all summer. (I do plan on bringing this up to him, because it is something important we need to talk about, but I would like to hear some of your guys' opinions about this anyways)...Thank you!

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Old 08-10-2008, 08:03 PM   #2
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Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

I think once you sit and talk with him about it you will get you answer. Theres no telling what hes thinking until you ask him what his thoughts about you going back to college is. Then you'll have a better idea of where he and the relationship stands.

Old 08-10-2008, 09:09 PM   #3
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Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

i think all you can do is let him know that you have every intention on keeping your relationship going despite the distance. Let him know that you'll be visiting as often as possible and keep assuring him that you won't be "forgetting about him" or "leaving him" in the long term. Sure, you're putting yourself on the line in case he might say that he doesn't want to keep up a long distance thing. But an hour or two isn't exactly that far, if you come visit twice a month, maybe he can go see you on the weekends when you don't come home, that way you're seeing each other almost every week.

Old 08-11-2008, 06:28 AM   #4
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Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

There's really no way to tell what he is thinking about the situation. Once you sit him down and talk about it you will know where he stands. I'm sure it is better to do it sooner than later that way you can feel better about it.

Old 08-11-2008, 07:36 AM   #5
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Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

Yes, I agree. It kind of sounds like he's just really going to miss you, but there's no way of knowing unless you talk to him about it.

Old 08-11-2008, 10:47 PM   #6
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BluEyez1031 HB User
Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

You definitely need to sit down and talk with him, and figure out if this is a "summer fling" relationship or something that he's willing to commit to long-distance. Honestly, having to be long distance after only four months can be extremely difficult, so you both need to put in a lot of thought as to whether you are willing to try and make things work.

I hate to sound like a downer, but I don't know any successful couples who transitioned from seeing each other constantly during the summer to being apart during the college school year without having established a really firm foundation for their relationship. However- you said this is your last year of school, right? That's definitely great incentive to try and make things work!

Old 08-12-2008, 10:26 AM   #7
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Re: Confused as to what my boyfriend means by this....

Why don't you ask him if he's interested in continuing dating/sexual exculsivity with the distance involved or not. And hear his answer. FYI - silence and stammering is an answer.

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