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Thinking about starting a relationship with my son's father again

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Old 08-24-2008, 10:10 AM   #1
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: ny
Posts: 73
patteecake HB User
Thinking about starting a relationship with my son's father again

I met my son's father in 02 after a nasty abusive relationship i left. At the end of July a month after my ex and i broke up. I met M and we went to the movies and ended up sleeping together. He asked me out and i said no. He said he wanted to marry me. But I wasn't over J and i needed a break from relationships all together. No one had ever asked me to marry them a day after meeting them. Even my ex that i dated for 2 yrs, waited a 1 yr and 1/2 to propose. I couldn't marry him b/c he was abusing me. I saw M after he came back from FL visiting his Grandparents. We dated for 2 weeks and i left him b/c he cheated on me. Yes i know why would you even think about going back out with him now after he cheated on you in the past? Well he hasn't cheated on his ex and they were together 5 years plus i am crazy to even think about this. I don't know i guess i was looking for people who experienced what i went through.

He only sees his son 1-2 a mth
He lives 30mins from me
He pays child support when he can
He quits jobs like underwear b/c he has bi polar and has a learning disability.
He has some college
He was adopted at birth ( now he doesn't want me to find his parents behind his back b/c he said i will try to milk them for money)
His adoptive parents are wealthy, yet i don't care about their money
I am disabled and so is my son we are both on SSI.
He's worried he wont get what he wants if he married me
We have alot of issues to work on.
He has agreed to go to counseling.
I have bi polar and Ehlers Danlos Syndrome
Its very confusing what he says.

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Old 08-24-2008, 03:23 PM   #2
Junior Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 14
rpett HB User
Re: Thinking about starting a relationship with my son's father again

Dear Patti, I think you're lonely. That's why you're considering this. It would just be so nice to have someone to love you, someone who's there, someone to rely on. I understand, trust me I do, but can this man really do those things for you? Can he come in and contribute to your life, or will he just be another draw on your precious resources?

Please protect yourself. Make no effort or committment other than agreeing to joint counselling. You don't have to make ANY other decisions right now. The counselling and his committment to it, will show you what to do next.

Good luck! <hug>

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