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  • Is the truth always better than a lie?!

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    Old 12-29-2008, 06:29 PM   #1
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    Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    I was thinking that one of the worst things about being with somebody that treats you like crap is that they usually mix just enough sweetness along with the crappiness with the right amount of smiling up in your face and lying to keep you hooked. Like... with my case...I'm mainly mad that he told me how much he loved and needed me and I was the only one forever and I mean I believed him wholeheartely! So imagine my shock one day when I found out all along he'd been talkin to some other girl and seeing her when she came around town. I was so mad and hurt, I swear I thought my heart was going to break completely in two! My mind kinda split from my body kinda pain, ya know.

    It's like... would I have been more ****** off if he'd have just came out and said at the beginning or somewhere in between at least, look... I love seeing you but I'm gonna see other people though. Wouldn't that have given me a choice to say yes or no instead of being let down by lies? Or is ignorance really bliss? If he woulda told me he was gonna see someone else or he didn't love me, I'd have been gone and lost even the good times that I had... even though they're tainted now of course. UGH.

    I don't know what I'm talkin about... bad night.

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    Old 12-30-2008, 04:17 AM   #2
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    Re: Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    The truth is always better than a lie. Believe me, it would have been better if this guy had told you the truth and let you know up front what the relationship really was so that you could have decided for yourself if that's what you wanted to get into or not.

    I know it's hard. It took me years and years to get over what some guy did to my heart when he lied to me and led me to think he cared way more than he did, and truth be told, I don't think I will ever really get over it. But i've done my best to get past it. One of the most important things I've learned is that it does no good to ask any of these "what if, I wish he had, should he have, should I have, would it have been better if..." kind of questions. You thought he loved you, you were wrong, it's over. Time to pick up the pieces, stop picking every second of your time together apart and analyzing it, bury it all in the back yard and leave it there, keep your eyes on the future and move on with your life. good luck to you.

    Old 12-30-2008, 05:25 AM   #3
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    Re: Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    You can confront him about it. If he lies, you have some thinking to do then. He admits it, find out just exactly went down then. I remember when I had a huge fight with my man, it was really bad fight. I went out got drunk with a friend...who then took advantage of the situation. I told my man, because I love him. I answered every question he had with all honesty. He had to pry it out of me, but that was because I kept crying and sobbing all over his work clothes saying "i'm sorry." It took us awhile to get over it..but we are still together...and its been almost 3 years since then. I dont get drunk anymore either! Just shows how strong love can be.

    Old 12-30-2008, 06:53 AM   #4
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    Re: Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    the truth is always better and here's may not be what someone wants to hear, BUT it's honest and if you're not honest and the other person finds out trust is broken........once trust is broken it's gone.
    I would have much respect for someone who told me the truth and be more inclined to believe them in the future, than someone who lied to me. Liars always get one is that good.

    Old 12-30-2008, 09:00 AM   #5
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    Re: Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    As much as the truth may hurt it is always better then the ignorance is bliss theory. I had a male friend who's wife he suspected was cheating on him and when I asked him why he hadn't either confronted her or made a point of finding out he said "I'd rather not know". Apparently the truth would have made him have to deal with a situation i.e. finances, his kids etc..... so he decided that he would go out and have an affair to cope with the betrayal. Great move eh?

    There is nothing like the truth. When it comes to men - many will stray from the truth because they don't want to deal with a woman's emotional reaction to it in general and of course if they are cheating they are trying to get away with something. I'm not one that wants a man to lie to me ever as I look to my partner of all people to be honest with me. WHen I've been in the early stages of a relationship with a man I've made sure to tell him that the quickest way to lose my respect is to lie to me - however small it may be especially if he's doing it to appease me.

    To me - there is nothing more attractive then an honest man. It may hurt to hear the truth but I respect a man greatly who is forthright no matter what the situation may be.

    Last edited by cathy1; 12-30-2008 at 09:03 AM.

    Old 12-30-2008, 10:24 AM   #6
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    Re: Is the truth always better than a lie?!

    I think telling the truth from the beginning is always better! I look at it this way..
    If you tell me from the start, I may be hurt, but I'll get over it soon enough.
    If you lead me on and tell me later down the road (or I find out elsewhere), not only do I have to deal with the hurt of whatever you lied about, but also the hurt of being lied to, and feeling deceived for however long it has been. All of that is gonna take a little longer than "soon enough" to get over.

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