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  • How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

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    Old 04-05-2009, 12:41 PM   #31
    Brkenhrt
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Furthermore, I just wanted to add this...

    To be honest with you, right now I cant say that im all that interested in even meeting her. Why you ask? Well because from our long talk on thurs night, just from how difficult she was making it just to make plans for 1st meetup, totally turned me off and made me see nothing but negative flaws from her. Just the fact that she was making it a complete chore, and was picky "wanted a upscale pub cause she was going to dress up and didnt want to feel out of place"..."didnt want to go to a dead place cause it was fri night"....yada yada yada. Just that stuff alone, totally gave me the impression that shes just an attn ***** (pardon my language), and cares more about her surroundings and what others think of her, than me. I mean, I kept thinking...who cares if the place is busy or not? Who cares if its super fancy? She was being so picky!
    Just from this talk on thurs night, made me lose just about all interest I had in her, in actually getting to know her. I dont know, but i was so turned off that night it wasnt even funny.

    If I did still meet up with her, it would be brief (like coffee) just to see how she is in person face to face. I believe you have to meet people in person at the very least to see how they really are. Some act differently in person than verbally over the phone. Just to see who she is, but I just dont think I could take her seriously anymore.

    The only reason why Im still even talking about her is because of how madly attracted I think I would be to her....physically.

    Last edited by Brkenhrt; 04-05-2009 at 12:47 PM.

     
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    Old 04-05-2009, 12:44 PM   #32
    Brkenhrt
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jessicca View Post
    Ahhh yeah... most definitely.

    Do you even know what she looks like? Are you attracted to her physically?
    I know what she looks like, she gave me a very indepth description - I have a very good image of her in my head. She keeps telling me that shes hot and has an amazing body and that she looks damn good.

    From the sounds of it and what shes told me, almost gaurenteed that I would be extremely attracted to her physically. Physically wise, shes exactly the type of girl I go for. Unfortunately, her personality (from what shes shown me thus far) is a complete turn off.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 12:48 PM   #33
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Brokenheart88 View Post
    I know what she looks like, she gave me a very indepth description - I have a very good image of her in my head. She keeps telling me that shes hot and has an amazing body and that she looks damn good.

    From the sounds of it and what shes told me, almost gaurenteed that I would be extremely attracted to her physically. Physically wise, shes exactly the type of girl I go for. Unfortunately, her personality (from what shes shown me thus far) is a complete turn off.
    Ahhhh yes well she may be one of those wierdos(pardon my french) who act like they are all that just to gain alot of attention from men EVEN if it's only through texting and instant messaging. There are women out there who really do this! I'm not saying that this is definite, but from her not meeting you yet, etc, seems kind of fishy to me!

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 12:49 PM   #34
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    oooo...or mb she was "exagerating a bit" about how she looks and now is worried about showing you...the real her...Not that she's a dawg, but perhaps she talkd herself to too high of standards than what she feels she really is and is afraid that she won't still make your heart swoon...?? Food for thought hmm? That's why she has no problem talking on the PHONE for 3 hours?? and can't commit to meeting face to face? could be a possibility?

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 12:50 PM   #35
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by marie25 View Post
    Well, I think that if you don't reply back to her text she already sent you...that she might think that it made you pretty upset about her cancelling/not caring about your "unofficial" plans..So if thats what you want her to think??? but if i were you...i would want her to think that it didnt bother me(which the other poster suggested)so you need to reply by saying it's ok, you were busy anyways...And then you could either leave it at that or ask her if she had fun...that's up to your preference of how YOU are. This is just MY opinion, MY advice..you don't have to follow it..but I know I used to be a really gamesy girl and I would've wanted guys to respond in this way and not get all pissy...not that she's seen you pissy or anything...I just think that this "type" of girl(just assuming this "type" from what you've said) is going to want a challenge...not an easy score.
    This is what a friend of mine said to say lol. Its incredibly bold but sarcastic at the same time, and it definitely gets the message across. She will be taken by surprise.

    Start off like how you suggested "its ok, I was busy anyways"...then add "Should I set you up with one of my buddies instead?" lol. If she doesnt get it, then shes as dumb as a rock.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 12:56 PM   #36
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jessicca View Post
    Ahhhh yes well she may be one of those wierdos(pardon my french) who act like they are all that just to gain alot of attention from men EVEN if it's only through texting and instant messaging. There are women out there who really do this! I'm not saying that this is definite, but from her not meeting you yet, etc, seems kind of fishy to me!
    Well two occasions she suggested we hang out, first time was the first night we talked and I said I was up for it, but then we went through that dry spell where she didnt contact me for 5 days. Second time was thurs, and we just about made plans but then she flaked on me the next day.

    I hate to say this, but I want to give her the impression that im not impressed by what shes shown me thus far (which is completely true) and have lost interest in getting to know her (not all, but just about). And if she wants to continue talking to me, she has to smarten up. I want her to make an effort and let her know that im not into games! Would this be too forward too soon? If not, and I can send her this message, how would I go about it?

    Last edited by Brkenhrt; 04-05-2009 at 12:57 PM.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 12:58 PM   #37
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by marie25 View Post
    oooo...or mb she was "exagerating a bit" about how she looks and now is worried about showing you...the real her...Not that she's a dawg, but perhaps she talkd herself to too high of standards than what she feels she really is and is afraid that she won't still make your heart swoon...?? Food for thought hmm? That's why she has no problem talking on the PHONE for 3 hours?? and can't commit to meeting face to face? could be a possibility?
    I dont think thats the case, but who knows. I just think shes playing too hard to get and is being a tease. Talk to me on a serious note one night for 3hrs, then flake on me the next like im nobody.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 01:00 PM   #38
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Brokenheart88 View Post
    Well two occasions she suggested we hang out, first time was the first night we talked and I said I was up for it, but then we went through that dry spell where she didnt contact me for 5 days. Second time was thurs, and we just about made plans but then she flaked on me the next day.

    I hate to say this, but I want to give her the impression that im not impressed by what shes shown me thus far (which is completely true) and have lost interest in getting to know her (not all, but just about). And if she wants to continue talking to me, she has to smarten up. I want her to make an effort and let her know that im not into games! Would this be too forward too soon? If not, and I can send her this message, how would I go about it?
    Well then you do that. How would you go about it? Good question, I'd have to think about that one.
    And If she doesn't smarten up, at least you won't be so hurt over this chick. But I have a feeling that she's playing mind games and she isn't all that attractive. Then how would you feel if she happened to meet you and wasn't what you expected? lol

    Last edited by Jess75; 04-05-2009 at 01:06 PM.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 01:04 PM   #39
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    yeah, sounds pretty frustrating. I wouldnt try sending any "messages" quite yet...take this one step at a time...dont rush things..that can be a turn off. The only way it wouldnt be a turn off is if she was desperate and then you woldnt want that anyways, right? Start with the sarcastic text you were taking about, I think that might just work. Hey, from a guys perspective, you should look at my post and tell me your advice..??

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 01:11 PM   #40
    Brkenhrt
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jessicca View Post
    Well then you do that. How would you go about it, good question, I'd have to think about that one.
    And If she doesn't smarten up, at least you won't be so hurt over this chick. But I have a feeling that she's playing mind games and she isn't all that attractive. Then how would you feel if she happened to meet you and wasn't what you expected? lol
    If that was the case and she isnt as hot as she says, then I would be relieved to say the least. Cause I tend to get way too caught up in girls that im extremely attracted to and if she isnt all that, then I would feel like i had a burden taken off my shoulders.

    I want to txt her right now, I still havent gotten back to her since she txt me late last night. What should I say? I want to keep it brief and give her the impression that im not impressed by her the least bit. Not impressed by her, but NOT upset.

    I think what my friend suggested "ill set you up with one of my buddies instead" is genius! BOLD AND SARCASTIC! I would be like "ill set you up with one of my buddies instead"..."I have some stupid guy friends who dont mind playing games"

    LOL, she would be so struck dont you think? Is that as bold as it can get? Then she will get the point that she has to smarten up if she still wants me.

    EDIT: But what if she gets all upset from this text? And go on about how shes not playing games and im assuming things, etc.?

    Last edited by Brkenhrt; 04-05-2009 at 01:14 PM.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 01:52 PM   #41
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    What should I say? I want to keep it brief and give her the impression that im not impressed by her the least bit. Not impressed by her, but NOT upset.
    Maybe say something like(sarcastically) "Thanks for calling me on Friday, what's up with that?" Something simple like that. You don't want to sound too mad, or overbearing.

    Last edited by Jess75; 04-05-2009 at 01:53 PM.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 03:17 PM   #42
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jessicca View Post
    Maybe say something like(sarcastically) "Thanks for calling me on Friday, what's up with that?" Something simple like that. You don't want to sound too mad, or overbearing.
    Honestly, I just cant take her seriously anymore. If she calls, so be it...ill pick up and be like "lets meet up" on tues or wed for a drink since thats her days off this week. Ill leave it at that, no more 3hr convos with her. If not, ill move on. But if i meet up with her, its pretty much not cause im interested in her but just I wanna see if shes as hot as she says or just all talk

    Like I said i just cant take her seriously anymore. Itll be for shits n giggles. Shes not dating material at all, I dont even have any intentions of dating her unless she completely changes and smartens up. I wouldnt even think of it as a date, but more like "going for coffee" I just now want to put a face to her mouth. Curiousty kills us at times doesnt it.

    Last edited by Brkenhrt; 04-05-2009 at 03:20 PM.

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 03:24 PM   #43
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Either way, please keep us updated...you got me all curious now.


     
    Old 04-05-2009, 03:34 PM   #44
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Brokenheart88 View Post
    Furthermore, (even though everyone thinks im an idiot for not ditching her already), Im still giving this girl the benefit of the doubt that shes NOT just playing me/leading me on. I will give her one more shot at us making plans but I might take Maries advice and play a bit hard to get for a bit and give her a taste of her own medicine.
    Brokenhearted I haven't read the all the posts so I apologies if I am covering old ground....

    With this post and the one previous, you are very defensive....I'm not sure you can really see what you are doing. You say that everyone is thinking you're an idiot for not ditching her. Well you actually have to be in a relationship before you can ditich someone and I think you are reaching in far too far. You dont have a relationship with this girl, you have a potential friendship and you are expecting too much.
    You mentioned in the previous post (to this) that she hasent 'explained herself' I mean come on she does not owe you anything...you've talked, that's all. You make yourself out to be some sort of gentleman by giving her a chance but really, my friend, you are coming across as despareate and possesive.
    I flicked though another thread you started regarding your depression and your desire to find the right person. Brokenhearted, I understand that sentiment, it's hard and depression can be cruel and I am not belittleing those emotions in any way. BUt you also note that you often come on too strong, that you find it hard to keep your emotions in check...I think Brokenhearted that you should leave this situation, not because of her behavior but because of yours....

    I'll give you a hint - real love does not involve any games, it happens naturally and you will not have any of these concerns...

    J

     
    Old 04-05-2009, 03:36 PM   #45
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    Re: How do YOU tell if a girl is playing hard to get? What are YOUR methods?

    Sorry I meant to say that she is obviously not behaving herself either but I do think you may have set yourself up...I am not excusing her at all...

     
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