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    Old 05-19-2009, 11:28 AM   #16
    trystme
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    Re: Need help

    You should get into counseling for yourself. There is something that you need to work out due to the fact that he has totally screwed you over. He has left you with little self esteem. I hope that he never contacts you again. He seriously sounds like a monster (and his mother too.)

     
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    Old 05-19-2009, 09:49 PM   #17
    XyzPqr
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    Re: Need help

    @ TrystMe : Erm... Ohkay - I will check up with the counseling bit.
    P.S. - Not only does he sound / behave like a monster - he looks like one too.
    Earlier, honestly, I did not find him good looking at all - he's 3 times my size & 1 inch shorter than me. Even my friends didn't want to see him let alone hanging out with him. Cuz even though he's 21; he looks WAY grown up - like somewhere around 29-30.

    But, with time - I came to believe he was hot. He always said " You should be grateful I'm dating someone like you when I can get so many other ' hot girls '." I am NOT hot but, decently pretty - not anorexic but, thin. Forget random guys, even his own friends seemed to hit on me. So, I definetly must NOT be ugly. But, I had come to believe that something must've been wrong with me / my friends since we found him UGLY. So, I started convincing myself he was cute - inspite of his big bulging belly & all the other factors listed above. EVERYONE who sees his pic - Disapproves !!

    And as for his mum - she ' counsels ' people through her ** - Why does she not do something about her son ? Can't she see where he's going with all those drugs, parties, and loose women ?

    Last edited by XyzPqr; 05-19-2009 at 10:01 PM.

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 05:32 AM   #18
    trystme
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    Re: Need help

    For a while, keep reminding yourself of how awful he is and all of the horrid things that he has done to you. When I broke up with my ex, that really helped me not miss him so much. The only reason that I missed him is b/c I was used to him. It takes time to learn to live without someone who has been around for so long even when they are terrible to you.

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 06:58 AM   #19
    XyzPqr
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    Re: Need help

    Yes - I have been used to his presence fr the past 4 years almost.

    But, come to think of it :
    Wasn't he ?

    So, that means he's prob susbstituing my absence with all those sluts he's hanging around with presently - Trying to convince himself that now - he has not just one - but SO MANY females around him ?

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 10:42 PM   #20
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    Re: Need help





    Thankyou all.

    Last edited by XyzPqr; 05-21-2009 at 12:16 AM.

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 11:42 PM   #21
    nobodyknows
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    Re: Need help

    hey sorry for not replying sooner.
    it sounds to me like this guy is in a downward spiral, so it's good you're gone before it got any worse. first of all his mom sounds crazy...i love her life coaching through **, that's hilarious! she sounds as deluded as her son!- so he's probably not going to turn out too good with his mom making him think his life goals are realistic and normal.
    really if he thinks marriage, family, or a girlfriend will stop him from reaching his goals or happiness then he has no business wasting your time. personally i think he sounds like he wants a gf who will be faithful while also doing whatever he wants.
    Really i decided a long time ago that the kind of relat's where a guy says i'll only sleep with you, i just need to be free to do blah blah blah are not going to go anywhere. you need more from a guy than just him not having sex with anyone else, that is not being committed to a relat. there are lots of guys in my city who are not having sex tonight, that doesn't make them all my boyfriend's.
    his obsession with all this stuff is crazy, you have no idea how lucky you are to be out of there.
    i guarantee you a year or two from now any updates you get about him will involve how fat he's gotten from drinking or that he was arrested for sexual assault...cuz animals don't change their spots
    i know this sounds cliche but you are very young so your life is ahead of you.
    feel free to pm me if you want

     
    Old 05-21-2009, 12:12 AM   #22
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    Re: Need help

    @NobodyKnows : If you were here, I would've given you a BIG hug.

     
    Old 05-21-2009, 12:16 AM   #23
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    Re: Need help

    xyz you're sweet, i hope i've been helpful & please keep me updated on how you're doing.

     
    Old 05-21-2009, 12:24 AM   #24
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    Re: Need help

    You're an
    And so are all the others who've tried to help me.

    I have decided that whenever I fluctuate, I will go through all these posts again so I can put my head back in its place. And I will start taking care of myself too - I haven't done that in a long time...

    Thank you lovely.

     
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