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Old 06-07-2011, 06:45 PM   #16
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Re: Help!

He either 1. wants sex or 2. got into a fight with his GF and is feeling sorry for himself and needs the ego boost of knowing you would still drop everything to be with him.

Why would you want to give him either one of those things?

What have you done since you two broke up? Have you met any new people, any new guys?

My ex called me out of the blue. Turned out, he got into a HUGE fight with his GF, they weren't seeing each other, and he wanted to feel better so he thought he could call good old me and I'd jump at the chance to hang out with him so he could get his hurt feelings all better. Like heck! I didn't respond, and I recommend you don't either. PS: he got back with the GF and I never heard from him again.

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Old 06-07-2011, 07:24 PM   #17
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Re: Help!

Oddly enough I had the same situation happen to me a few months ago. I was with the guy for 2 1/2 years and then a year after the breakup he text me. He wanted to see how I was doing and he hoped all was well. He wanted to make sure I am happy because thats all he wanted for me was to be happy (so he said).
Our break up was pretty mutual we both didnt like where our relationship had gone. When I got the text the first instinct was to be nice and text him back and then I thought to myself. He doesnt really care how I am doing and he is probably just checking up on me in this egotistical way.
Its almost like the text was his way of feeling better about himself. One to get any guilt or last bit of feelings off his chest. Two to make sure that his life is going better than mine . Finally three, he wants to see if you have any last feelings for him that might give him the chance to " hit that" again in your moment of weakness. Lets face it most guys only text an ex after that long to see if there is any chance of hooking up again.
Turns out I was right...I found out from a friend that he had just had a huge fight with his current girlfriend and was somehow trying to get back at her by texting me. So dont read to much into it. Guys dont tend to think like we do. They dont analyze texts like that. If they got a text like that from an ex they would take full advantage of the fact that you are most likely vunerable.
Im sorry if this is not what you wanted to hear. I mean there still is a chance that he could be one of those rare men who have their exes in their best interest. With my experience those rare men dont exist!

Old 06-08-2011, 01:53 AM   #18
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Re: Help!

He is texting you to feel you out to see if you are available for sex and possible mind games/ drama.
Is it worth your time to answer his text?
He has spent his time shopping himself around to see if he has anything better on the market. Turns out, he can't find anything better than you, and if considering coming back. Sound appealing? He had to dump you and make the rounds before thinking you were worthwhile?
If you get back together, he will still be the same guy, same RL, same drama.
Block his #. Technology is your friend.

Old 06-08-2011, 10:43 AM   #19
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Re: Help!

i agree with the idea that he's probably just checking in to see if you still have feelings for him (which you clearly do), and if he still has the ability to get you back (even if that's not what he really wants), or perhaps just trying to get laid.. It's also possible that he has matured a bit since the breakup and is just generally curious about your life and what's going on with you. With things like ******** and twitter, it's very easy to see what is going on in people's lives, and those types of social networking always tend to increase one's curiousity. I'll admit, I have an ex or two that I would like to check in on just out of sheer curiousity to see where their life has taken them and nothing else, no other motives, but I refrain, because I am in a happy, healthy relationship and I know my boyfriend would not be pleased if I started emailing my exes to see what's going on in their lives. It sounds like you are intent on responding, so if you chose to go down that road, keep it simple and brief. Say you are well, and spending time preparing for your exams. Do not mention that you miss him, still love him, etc, it will only add fuel to the fire.

Old 06-08-2011, 01:24 PM   #20
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Re: Help!

This song is the best! Listen to it and you'll love it..
I myself am going threw a heart break!
Hope everything gets better.

Old 06-13-2011, 09:06 AM   #21
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Re: Help!

First time poster and just joined today, but wow what great advice you guys give.

I'm kind of on the same boat with an old ex that I still love (or think) and what I learned to do when she txt's is not to over analyze it and just move on. You could end up back in square 1 if it ended up not becoming the ending you wanted.

Remember how hard it was in the beginning? Do you really want to be in that stage again, when all you felt was pain and heartaches? The stupid times where you think every love song makes sense about the situation you are in?

Trust me, I set myself up for that mutiple of times, even though my ex and I were/are still friends after the break up, it was hard. Even when I had a gf. It was easier when I knew she had a bf, but she has been single for awhile now and it just makes my current relationship more confusing.

I like cryingforever's advice and thoughts. I know I haven't posted my problems or questions about my relationships, but cryingforever keep posting.

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