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  • Anxiety after break up

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    Old 10-02-2011, 04:40 PM   #1
    talitatraveler
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    Arrow Anxiety after break up

    Hello,

    I have been experiencing anxiety attacks since I broke up with my ex about two months ago. He broke up with me because he said that he was not ready to be fully committed and that he was afraid, but that he loves me deeply and because he cares that much he prefered to break up with me rather than to hurt me in the future.

    The first two weeks were awful, constant anxiety, I was not eating well, I was afraid to be alone in my apartment... also, I was smoking like crazy.

    I was calling him at least twice a week, always crying and asking him why did he left me. That made me feel so low and depressed. Since I am a very strong person and to be so vulnerable with him makes me very depressed.

    One day, I called him and told him to meet with me for a coffee... long story short, we ended up in his apartment having sex. Since that day, we have had sex at least once a week. Everything seems to be as it was before, we love each other a lot, we are nice to each other, we talk and do things we did as a couple, but bottom line is that we are not "together"

    One day of this week, after spending the night together, he went early to work and left me alone in his apartment. I was tempted to go into his computer... I went to his ******** account and found out in his messages that he has been flirting and having cyber sex with two girls (even before we broke up). He came back early from work and I couldn't hold it and told him what I have read. He told me nothing happened far from the internet chats, etc, etc... that situation teared me apart...

    Point is, that we are in this situation where we love each other, but we are not together, obviously now we don't even trust each other... all day I feel constant anxiety because I do not know what to do, he is nice to me but at the same time he has hurt me a lot...

    I feel that my head is gonna explode and I feel I have lost all control of this situation. Any advice is gonna be well received... Thanks!

    (Excuse me If there are some orthographic mistakes, but English is my second language so I tried my best to express myself in this forum!)

     
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    Old 10-02-2011, 10:36 PM   #2
    Larrylou'smom
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    Re: Anxiety after break up

    Continuing to have sex with someone who has rejected you will only make you feel worse in the long run. It will destroy your self esteem and your confidence. As painful as it will be, you must break off all contact with this guy. I know you don't want to. I know how hard it will be to not see him anymore, to not have him in your life anymore, but he has made it clear he doesn't want to commit to you. You're settling for little scraps he's throwing you and that will only mess with your head big time. You need to get over him and the only way to do that is to cut him out of your life and get started building a rewarding, successful life that doesn't include him. The sooner you do that, the better you will feel about not being with him anymore, and the less it will hurt.

     
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