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  • Resentment towards family.

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    Old 03-23-2014, 03:29 AM   #1
    vanessa1990
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    Resentment towards family.

    It's gotten to a point where I feel nothing for my older sibling but resentment.
    I had a fantastic childhood, we just began to clash as we grew up. He's 7 years older than me.
    As we began to clash, he started being horrible to me. Putting his friends before me, constantly bullying/trying to get a rise out of me, he's hit me a few times, and even told me to "end my life."
    It's at the point now where I feel like I can't get past it all, even when my parents have encouraged me to open up and tell him how I feel. He's not the kind of person who I'm able to sit down and discuss issues with.
    I feel bad for my parents, as anyone wouldn't want to see their kids in conflict, and I feel like a selfish person keeping my distance from him, but I feel like in this case I need to put myself first and distance myself from his negativity.

    I know family is blood, but if a person has consistently treated you so bad for a very long time, do they really deserve forgiveness just because he's your sibling? I feel nothing but bitterness towards him now. And I don't think I can get past the years of pain he has inflicted onto me.

     
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    Old 03-23-2014, 11:48 AM   #2
    lenvegas
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    Re: Resentment towards family.

    Hi, by not forgiving him you are allowing bitterness and resentment to consume you and it allows him to keep torturing you even when he is not there. Forgiveness is never easy but is a way to go ahead with your life in a positive way. Living well is the best revenge so strive for happiness and know that you are worthy of it. I am sure your brother is fighting his own demons and someday he will realize how wrong he was to treat you that way but in the mean time I think you are right in keeping your distance from him. Hopefully in the future you two can resolve this because someday the only family you both have will be each other.

     
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    Old 03-23-2014, 03:53 PM   #3
    vanessa1990
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    Re: Resentment towards family.

    But I feel if I give him forgivenesses it'll mean he won't be accountable for all that he's done, and it's just him getting away with it, yet again.
    Even if he was the last family member left, he doesn't act like a brother towards me so really, I shouldn't consider him a family member.
    Like I said, just because someone is blood, doesn't give them a free pass to treat you badly.
    Thank-you for your response.

     
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