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hi - schizophrenia - new to here, bit scared, but glad others r here

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Old 12-26-2007, 06:21 PM   #1
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: London
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olanzapina HB User
hi - schizophrenia - new to here, bit scared, but glad others r here


I am so happy I´ve found this board!!! I was diagnosed as being paranoid schizophrenic a couple of years ago, maybe three, I don’t like to remember really. I was locked up for a couple of weeks and given loads of drugs, against my will and eventually after a year or two I started to see sense. I am 40 years old and have never had mental problems in my life. I had cervical cancer at 33 shortly after my first child and then breast cancer and then at the age of 38 I started to believe it was impossible for me to have breast cancer at such a young age so then my brain came up with lots of other reasons.
I started refusing to take my breast medication because I didn’t believe I had breast cancer (I started believing I was part of a reality tv show, that I was being filmed everywhere I went, that everyone in Spain and England was watching me on TV every night etc etc..I lost all my friends because I accused them of watching me on TV, so basically why were they asking me what I did last night when they knew perfectly well? Etc etc. I have basically had the most miserable time. I´m a really nice person, I swear, but I´ve lost friends because of this horrible illness and I hate it. I´ve said totally nutty things to friends such as my husband is trying to kill me etc etc, just awful.
Anyway I´d just love to make friends with anyone who´s been in my situation. I´m a kind and genuine person and I´d love to help someone in the same boat as me, I´d also love to have any communication whatsoever with someone who may have gone through similar things to me.
Olanzapina xx
please someone say

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Old 12-28-2007, 06:01 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: flint,mi,united states
Posts: 121
Lonely810810 HB User
Re: hi - schizophrenia - new to here, bit scared, but glad others r here

HI,I am on this board and have been here for a few years this website is unlike any others.I love this board so many encouraging stories and people.I have had alot of tough expeiences myself.Lately I have just been trying to keep my head above water literally.I feel so weak anymore and I have a family that depends on me which I think makes me feel even worse.I can barely depend on myself to get through the day let alone others.However I manage to maintain somewhat.I have become a person I do not even recognize anymore doing things totally out of character.Things I am too embarassed to even mention.My life has completely flipped upside down.I know this isn't much help but maybe it is in the fact that there are others out there like you maybe not in your social circle but in life there are and we are all here too pat you on your back and tell you keep going just when you feel like your on your last breath the finish line is right ahead.Take care of yourself and I hope to hear from you or some one soon..Good Luck!

Old 01-09-2008, 04:27 AM   #3
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: London
Posts: 11
olanzapina HB User
Re: hi - schizophrenia - new to here, bit scared, but glad others r here

Hi lonely!

Thanks for replying and apologies for my delay in getting back on this board. I´m sorry to hear your life is not great at the moment and sincerely sympathise with you, my life was totally insane for years but I´ve got it back together now I think. You can get it better too. Please just concentrate on yourself. I know that´s almost impossible when you´ve got children and husband to look after but you just have to. Otherwise you will end up being locked up which is not good for them either but if they can´t help and understand then ultimately that will be what happens. You tell your husband that. In the meantime, I´m here, for what that´s worth. I know other people being here is worth a lot to me, so... Don´t be lonely, lonely!


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