It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Self-injury Recovery Message Board

  • Feeling ashamed

  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 08-18-2014, 05:12 PM   #1
    NerdGirl2016
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    NerdGirl2016's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2014
    Location: United States
    Posts: 32
    NerdGirl2016 HB User
    Unhappy Feeling ashamed

    I've been a self-harmer since early 2012 when I was in 8th grade and now I'm 16 and still have major problems...just this past Thursday I relapsed after being 235 days clean the day before and I was so ****** I couldn't believe I just did that. I was so fed up with anger & persistent medical issues it happened all of a sudden......

    So I found a broken pencil and repeatedly stabbed my left shoulder/arm, and well as trying to dig as deep as possible in my arm. I'm sorry if this seems crazy and awful but i just had to do it. Then on Friday I found a sharpener and unscrewed its blade and cut myself every day including today. I'm afraid that I might go too deep or cut too many times so it's noticeable again. This is like an addiction to me. I already see a therapist and he is phenomenal, but I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like sh*t for relapsing. If anyone else can relate or at least give me some help & advice I'd greatly appreciate it

     
    The following 3 users give hugs of support to: NerdGirl2016
    flamesabers (08-19-2014),mysterygurl (10-24-2014),PurpleLego (08-22-2014)
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 08-18-2014, 05:50 PM   #2
    flamesabers
    Senior Veteran
    (male)
     
    Join Date: Sep 2011
    Posts: 807
    flamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB Userflamesabers HB User
    Re: Feeling ashamed

    Hello.

    I don't think your post sounds crazy. Have you talked to your therapist about what has happened? If not, he may be able to give you some useful guidance on how to cope when the urge to cut seems insurmountable.

    Speaking from my own experience, cutting isn't a coping mechanism that is easy to unlearn, especially when you're very stressed out. I think it's excellent that you have abstained from self-harm for 235 days. Wanting to stop self-harm is crucial to actually achieving the feat. Relapsing with self-harm is very common I think, so please don't judge yourself too harshly.

     
    Old 08-18-2014, 07:34 PM   #3
    NerdGirl2016
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    NerdGirl2016's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2014
    Location: United States
    Posts: 32
    NerdGirl2016 HB User
    Re: Feeling ashamed

    Hello flamesabers,

    Thanks for your "hug" and quick reply. I have been discussing my harming habits for some time with my therapist. He suggests hiding my tools in an obscure place that by the time I start looking for long, my emotions sort of cooled down. I also keep a journal for him to read my thoughts. I knew relapse was a part of this but I didn't see this coming. I'll try to be easier on myself although that will take some work.

     
    Old 10-23-2014, 06:21 PM   #4
    mysterygurl
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Mar 2013
    Location: Minnesota
    Posts: 27
    mysterygurl HB User
    Re: Feeling ashamed

    Hi,

    I know what you mean and completely understand I was a cutter when I was 15 and 16 years old I am now almost 27 and I was clean about 8 years and just slipped up big time now I know this might seem discouraging big the cool thing was I was clean for about 8 years without one slip but it took me an residential treatment center for a year to stop but everyone is different the fact is that it is possible to stop but its hard as all get out and it is an addiction just like alcohol or drugs but it can be done and I wish you luck

    -MG-

     
    Closed Thread

    Tags
    cutting, relapse, upset



    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is Off
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:13 AM.





    © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!