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sexual nervousness

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Old 07-19-2005, 01:17 PM   #1
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lexcorp HB User
sexual nervousness

Hi. I am 19 years old. I am a virgin and was at a party recently when an older lady (25) came on to me. She took me too her bedroom and we were kissing and things. Then she started to take my clothes off and i became really nervous. I even felt my mouth go dry for the first time in my life through sheer nerves. I could not get an erection for the life of me! She was a very pretty girl as well. I made my excuses and left, but i've felt like crap ever since

I have since turned down the advances of other girls out of fear of the same thing happeining.

Is there something i can take to reduce my nerves in these situtations? I am a slightly anxious person anyway but i would really like this problem fixed first.


Last edited by lexcorp; 07-19-2005 at 03:08 PM.

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Old 07-19-2005, 01:47 PM   #2
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orion HB Userorion HB Userorion HB Userorion HB Userorion HB User
Re: sexual nervousness

Originally Posted by lexcorp
Is there something i can take to reduce my nerves in these situtations? I am a slightly anxious person anyway but i would really like this problem fixed first.
It's very normal to be nervous and it sound like you are a nice guy so maybe you felt uneasy about what you were doing. Lots of guys have trouble getting erections when they are too nervous. The best thing to do is to try to focus on her and what she wants and maybe just make out and get each other off with clothes on first until you are comfortable with her. As you get over your shyness about being naked and being a sexual being, you will warm up to having more fun. After you have ejaculated a few times with clothes on or just slightly undressed and with the same girl, then you might be confortable going further if she wants. Not every guy can get into a one night stand even with a pretty lady. Actually it says something about your character that you didn't feel confortable doing what you were doing.

Remember its all about having fun, and making the other person feel good and being confortable with what you are doing. If you don't get an erection, just say that happens sometimes with my silly penis and keep going. Not that it isn't embarassing, but hey, it happens to all guys sometimes.

Don't turn down other girls. Just because they come on to you doesn't mean you have to go all the way. Make out, do hand stuff, oral or what ever comes to mind. Making out on a couch can be very hot and would probably make you more comfortable before you go further. You need the practice and this kind of practice is fun, for you and her. Don't forget she will be nervous too, wondering if her breasts are nice enough, if she remember clean underwear or're not the only one whose sweating in there!

Last edited by orion; 07-19-2005 at 01:52 PM.

Old 07-19-2005, 03:19 PM   #3
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Posts: 27
lexcorp HB User
Re: sexual nervousness

Hi Orion. Just wanted to thank you for your reply.

Also wanted to bump up the thread in the hope of more replies. Maybe from people who have had similar experiences and possible advice on techniques/anxiety drugs etc that could be of use.

Old 07-20-2005, 05:39 AM   #4
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 396
wildcat66 HB User
Re: sexual nervousness

I dont care who your are you are gonna be nervous the first time ! I wouldnt go rushing into drugs, be calm and wait until you meet someone that you have more with than just a roll in the sack, this will make it easier.

Old 07-21-2005, 04:26 PM   #5
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beck12 HB User
Re: sexual nervousness

My husband had this happen when we were first together. Worse yet, he worried about it & it kept happening. I finally said "We need to talk about this"... & I tiold him that I didn't care & I wasn't going to say anything to anybody (well - now you guys know but you don't count) and that what bothered me most was his frustration & how I could "feel" the pressure he was putting on the situation. I said when it happens, it happens & until then, I just want to have a good time with you no matter what, whether that is in bed or otherwise. That was the last time it ever happened & over 10 yrs ago. Just relax - and maybe try to get to know someone a little more so that you don't have to worry that she's only there for the night & then you feel this pressure to "rise" to the occassion. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you other than the fact that this woman made you nervous & now you're questioning yourself. Good luck to you!

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