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Erection / Arousal problems

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Old 03-04-2007, 02:48 PM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 4
UK_Guy_1981 HB User
Erection / Arousal problems

Hi guys, I noticed some good advice being handed out on this board so I think this could be a good starting point for my problem(s).

I am 26 years old guy from the UK and without beating around the bush I will get straight to the problem.

For sometime now I have had problems maintaining erections during sexual activity. I have had sexual intercourse with 1 partner 6 months ago or so several times without ever climaxing.

Now I love women, I am no different from any other guy on that aspect, I actually find beauty and attraction in more women that possibly others do.

My first ever chance of having sex was in Feb 2002 with a partner I was very very close to and I didnt function at all when we were about to have sex. Back then I was too naive to consider it a problem and thought it was just one of these things.

4 years on I have had several other partners or girls I 'am friends with' and I still never got anywhere until eventually when with a partner who was aware I had problems in the past, we had sex which I enjoyed very much but unfortunately without climax any of the times we had sex.

The source of my problem has now been discovered and its been well and truly addressed. Ever since I have had access to the internet (6 years or so) I have had an ongoing problem with masterbation, thinking back it is frightening the amount of times I have masterbated to the porn available on the net and until last year I never once paid for it, I did for a short period in small amounts but thanks to the partner I did have sex with, paying for it is no longer a problem but there is still free stuff available which I refer to from to time.

In the last two weeks I have had 2 different partners and on both occasions I have failed to maintain an erection, thankfully the one last night didnt want to have unprotected sex so that saved some faith

In the past I have thought that the masterbating I have done over the years may be having an effect on my sex life but I was too naive to think it actually was but now that I have realised how bad things were I am starting to wonder if I will ever be cured, I know this is not positive thinking but being in the situation I am in is not easy to accept at times.

With help from the partner I have had sex with I am slowly starting to stop watching porn and even masterbating at all but I can openly admit it didnt stop straight away but now after reading for myself I am starting to be a little more open minded.

I can EASILY maintain an erection during masterbation, infact I can maintain it for sometime which I would be proud of if with a women but unfortunately when I am with a women I dont even see a shadow of what I am capable of when I am with a women, not even during oral / foreplay. It might be worth noting that in the morning after sleeping in the same bed as a partner I react much better but still not to the best of my capabilities.

I now have several possibilities of sexual partners, possibly even casual partners but thats irrelevant and I am now at a time in my life where I want to conquer these demons which I fear can ruin my life.

I think anyone who wishes to reply to this has enough information but feel free to ask anything, I will be very open to solve this.

Thanks in advance.

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Old 03-04-2007, 07:26 PM   #2
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 148
anyman HB User
You need to step away from the porn. Now. It is giving you a flawed sense of life (m)

Porn is not real- few regular woman look or act like that. I'll take the real thing any day. Ge away from it before you end up w/ lifelong issues. The fact that you are here says there is hope. Go find it with a real life person willing and able to work with you. Treat it like an alcoholic treats booze: It's simply not available.

Good luck.

Old 03-05-2007, 01:43 AM   #3
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 4
UK_Guy_1981 HB User
Re: Erection / Arousal problems

Yes, I know, I'm aware that porn is not real, well not real in a sense that it isnt happening to me.

Theres definately hope for me but I was looking for advice / guidance / pointers on the extent of the problem I have considering how long it has been going on for. How long does it take for the mind and body to reset itself to being aroused? How long do I need to be 'good' on all levels including female company? Because the truth is that 9/10 myself and the women are usually doing 'things' before not too long, must be my personality ha, only messing

Old 03-05-2007, 11:32 AM   #4
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 4
UK_Guy_1981 HB User
Re: Erection / Arousal problems

** Bump **

Old 03-09-2007, 02:51 PM   #5
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 2
Shareholder HB User
Re: Erection / Arousal problems

I basically have the same problem and there was a period of time for a few weeks where I stopped looking at porn and masturbating in general, and even though I was single during that period of time I had so many sexual urges when I saw attractive women that I felt like I could perform a lot better than I usually would, even though I never got the chance to. I think stopping masturbation plus a combination of weighlifting will help a lot.

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