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Old 06-03-2001, 02:27 AM   #1
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Atlanta, GA USA
Posts: 3
saildawg HB User
Help Please

Hi, My girlfriend and I have decided to have sex, which is like my dream come true. We have tried it twice, and I have not been able to maintain an erection. This is destroying my self confidence and overall outlook on life. When she gives me head I am as hard as ever, just when the thought of sex comes into my mind, my penis goes limp. Is there something wrong with me, I really want to have sex, and I love my girlfriend very much. This is my forst time as well as hers. Is there anything I can do about this problem. I am eighteen and healthy.

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Old 06-03-2001, 01:29 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: NYC
Posts: 825
keil HB Userkeil HB Userkeil HB Userkeil HB User
Re: Help Please

You say you are 18 and healthy, well maybe its not physical but mental. Your body may be telling you its not time for this important decision, give it time - whats the rush, I know your going crazy, but relax and when the time is right it will happen.
Also you don't say your GF's age, or where you are planing this wounderful exchange of love and hopefully commitment, this may have something to do with it too.
let us know how you 2 are doing.

Old 06-04-2001, 03:58 AM   #3
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,622
Lance2 HB UserLance2 HB UserLance2 HB User
Re: Help Please

A couple of thoughts...our mind and our penis are very much connected. The first time is packed with perform and do it right and be a man and all that other stuff. So, there is alot going on. Now add the fact that you couldn't stay erect on a couple of tries and you're now feeling inadequate, afraid and you're gonna try to hard (no pun intended!) This happens to all of us! You'll have to take some time and try to forget the erection issue and just have fun "playing," things will be OK...just give yourself a break. Also, your hand and a vagina are very different. You're probably used to your grip and speed during masturbation, a vagina simply is not built the same way so it's not uncommon for there to be a time of adjustment. You can do the oral thing because there is more confinement and other stuff going on there that seem consistent to your friend.

Now on another note, being a virgin really is OK. There should be no pressure for the two of you to enter the sexual phase of your relationship. I can promise you it will change your relationship. And it's certainly gonna change you....once you go there, it's really hard to stop. So the two of you really need to be sure this is what you want to do and should do. If you decide to go on with as safe as you can with a condom and protection, I doubt that being parents is something you want to deal with right now!

Old 06-04-2001, 07:53 AM   #4
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Atlanta, GA USA
Posts: 3
saildawg HB User
Re: Help Please

Hi, first off lrt mr say that my girlfriend is also eighteen, and I am not affraid of commitment. The feeligs I have toward her are so intense and I know she is the ne for me. We have een going out for almost 1 year. I guess I am scared of sex, but we do use a condom and she is starting birth control. Maybee I will feel better after she is on that for a month, and it starts working. Also I am on accutane, an acne drug, that has a small percentage of ed, but this is less than .05%. I guess my overall erection is not as hard and firm as it used to be. I guess thigs will get better when I am off the drug, but in the meantime, I would like to try some herbs out. I am thinking of Horny Goat Weed. Let me know i you think this is a ood idea, or if you have any other input.

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