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Not Quite Sure..

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Old 09-21-2007, 08:00 AM   #1
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: St. Helens
Posts: 1
StBt07 HB User
Unhappy Not Quite Sure..

Well.. Three years ago, my Mum overdosed on approx. 45 pain killers, washed down with Whisky. How she survived is beyond me but then, a few months later, she did exactly the same thing, and doctors decided it was best to put her in a Phsyciatric Ward for around 3-4 months. We thought she recovered, but then two months later she overdosed on her medication. Didnt do as much harm, but made her see things and fall over all the time. We took her to hospital were she stayed untill the night. She recovered but it took a real chunk out of me. I don't know why she did it and I sometimes blame myself for it. I wonder what I could have done to help and now I don't know what to do, I'm so confused. The amount of times I wonder how better things would be if I wasn't here. Then, two nights ago, I was so down and felt lonely, I tried to overdose. It didn't do much, only made me throw up and have tummy ache . I don't want to tell anybody because people may think I'm a bit .. weird!! .. I'm 16, and yes, you think I have the rest of my life ahead of me, but I don't want it. The amount of things that have happened, I wonder why I'm here im the first place. It might be a bit selfish of me to say this, because there are people worse off than me. But I want help. If I don't tell someone I'm goin to be tempted to do it again, but im too scared to tell anyone. What can I do?

Last edited by StBt07; 09-21-2007 at 02:43 PM. Reason: There was a mistake

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Old 11-30-2007, 02:51 PM   #2
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 219
Gia029 HB User
Re: Not Quite Sure..

You need to tell someone soon. Your first step was reaching out on here but you need to see a doctor and talk to someone about your feelings. I'm sorry to hear about your mom, you should not blame yourself tho. The next time you think you are going to harm yourself call a crisis intervention line or just call 911, or go to a hospital emergency. It is a struggle to deal with deppression but if you ask for the help when you need it everything will be ok. I have suffered from deppression now for 3 1/2 years and medication makes a world of difference for me.

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