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Depression...a constant battle

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Old 10-05-2011, 03:25 AM   #1
RayneeSue's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Chautauqua, NY USA
Posts: 1
RayneeSue HB User
Unhappy Depression...a constant battle

Depression is an everyday fight, which is exhausting. Unless a person experiences this disease, they don't have a clue. I also suffer from Panic and PTSD. I have suffered the panic attacks since I was 3 years old. Of course at that age I did not know what was wrong with me. All I knew there was this awful feeling that if I ate something I was going to choke to death. My father was an alcoholic and my mother had some serious personality issues. I believe that my father & mother should of never been parents. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 33 years old with Depression/Panic/PTSD (I am 56 now). Although I had hospitalizations and suicide attempts before I was 33 years old.

With my illness I am biologically predisposed and my childhood environment was pretty horrendous. Since I was 33 years old I have been through extensive counseling (I still see a Therapist at least once a month). Not all Therapists are good. My current Therapist is very good. I have tried many medications over the years. It is a fine line between medicated to a functioning level and being medicated into an almost vegetative state. At the moment I am on WellbutrinXL 150 mg, Lorazapam, and Gabapentin. There is a serious shortage of Psychiatrists where I live. For over the past year I have been seen by a Physicians Assistant, which I feel all he is qualified to do is write prescriptions.

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Some days my illness comes close to consuming me...

Last edited by mentalhealth mod; 10-06-2011 at 07:00 AM.

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