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  • Playing Hard To Get

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    Old 11-14-2005, 05:27 PM   #16
    CyberNick
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Well if you have blatantly told these men that you have no interest in them and they are still pursuing you... it's most likely out of desperation. It's sad that some men can't seem to accept rejection in any way, shape or form, but it happens.

    Or perhaps they are men who are just looking for a good time, so even though they know you're not interested in them relationshipwise, they still think they can persuade you into seeing them because they are full of themselves or not used to rejection from women. They might have disillusioned themselves into thinking that you actually are playing hard to get, when you are seriously blowing them off.

    Whether it's category A or B, I really don't understand a man who will still pursue someone when he has bluntly and blatantly been told "NO!"

     
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    Old 11-14-2005, 05:31 PM   #17
    lostsoul1
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Nah, Greeneyes, if the man wants the woman badly enough... if she shows interest, he'll go for it. Once I knew my last was interested in me beyond a doubt.. that's when I overcame all the fear I had and went for it. I wanted her so badly for so long.. it was so great to know for sure she wanted me back. Almost too good to be true.

    And Sophia, if I had to guess.. it's because the kind of man who women turn down tend to be the clingy, desperate types who can't find dates easily. The ones you are attracted to probably have a lot of options, so they're going to have a much easier time walking away from a situation.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 05:32 PM   #18
    greeneyes100
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by CyberNick
    Well if you have blatantly told these men that you have no interest in them and they are still pursuing you... it's most likely out of desperation. It's sad that some men can't seem to accept rejection in any way, shape or form, but it happens.

    Or perhaps they are men who are just looking for a good time, so even though they know you're not interested in them relationshipwise, they still think they can persuade you into seeing them because they are full of themselves or not used to rejection from women. They might have disillusioned themselves into thinking that you actually are playing hard to get, when you are seriously blowing them off.

    Whether it's category A or B, I really don't understand a man who will still pursue someone when he has bluntly and blatantly been told "NO!"
    I never "blantantly" say no...I usually leave it up to the man. If he strings me along, I do the same. What have I got to lose?

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 05:36 PM   #19
    SophiaM
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by lostsoul1
    Nah, Greeneyes, if the man wants the woman badly enough... if she shows interest, he'll go for it. Once I knew my last was interested in me beyond a doubt.. that's when I overcame all the fear I had and went for it. I wanted her so badly for so long.. it was so great to know for sure she wanted me back. Almost too good to be true.

    And Sophia, if I had to guess.. it's because the kind of man who women turn down tend to be the clingy, desperate types who can't find dates easily. The ones you are attracted to probably have a lot of options, so they're going to have a much easier time walking away from a situation.
    Well, the ones I was attracted to, I obviously didn't turn down. I had relationships with them; it just never went anywhere. The ones who were so persistant in pursuing me had other options but they didn't want those girls who wanted them. They wanted ME who didn't want them. It's weird. So many people are driven by uncoscious desires and they want what they can't have. I know it doesn't make any logical sense, but it's true. One of these guys who pursued me for a long time actually had this much younger, beautiful girl (I saw her pictures) practically throwing herself at him and begging him to marry her. But, he was not sure about her. He wanted me, even though I told him from the start I didn't want to be anymore than a friend to him. I acted very flaky and sometimes even a bit bit**y with him because he irritated me, and yet he seemed to be turned on by that!!! Men are strange and nobody will convince me otherwise

    Last edited by SophiaM; 11-14-2005 at 05:39 PM.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 05:41 PM   #20
    greeneyes100
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by SophiaM
    Well, the ones I was attracted to, I obviously didn't turn down. I had relationships with them; it just never went anywhere. The ones who were so persistant in pursuing me had other options but they didn't want those girls who wanted them. They wanted ME who didn't want them. It's weird. So many people are driven by uncoscious desires and they want what they can't have. I know it doesn't make any logical sense, but it's true. One of these guys who pursued me for a long time actually had this much younger, beautiful girl (I saw her pictures) practically throwing herself at him and begging him to marry her. But, he was not sure about her. He wanted me, even though I told him from the start I didn't want to be anymore than a friend to him. I acted very flaky and sometimes even a bit bit**y with him because he irritated me, and yet he seemed to be turned on by that!!! Men are strange and nobody will convince me otherwise
    Sophia, men are driven by one thing: Testosterone...

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 05:45 PM   #21
    SophiaM
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by greeneyes100
    Sophia, men are driven by one thing: Testosterone...
    YES, I think you're right! Whenever I was really nice and sweet to a guy, it NEVER worked in my favor! I mean, NEVER.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 06:14 PM   #22
    DonutsNCoffee
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by SophiaM
    YES, I think you're right! Whenever I was really nice and sweet to a guy, it NEVER worked in my favor! I mean, NEVER.
    Sophia, I think you've been meeting the wrong kind of men. Whenever I had a woman be really nice and sweet to me, it always made me think better of her. It didn't always make me attracted to her, but I would always like being around her if she treated me that way.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 06:19 PM   #23
    SophiaM
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by DonutsNCoffee
    Sophia, I think you've been meeting the wrong kind of men. Whenever I had a woman be really nice and sweet to me, it always made me think better of her. It didn't always make me attracted to her, but I would always like being around her if she treated me that way.
    Well, perhaps I have THe guys I dated were attracted to me and crazy about me UNTIL I fell in love with them and started being nice. Go figure.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 06:26 PM   #24
    degen95
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by SophiaM
    Well, perhaps I have THe guys I dated were attracted to me and crazy about me UNTIL I fell in love with them and started being nice. Go figure.
    that sounds like what typically happens to guys!! they get nice and the girl gets bored. maybe it works both ways.

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 06:50 PM   #25
    SophiaM
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by degen95
    that sounds like what typically happens to guys!! they get nice and the girl gets bored. maybe it works both ways.
    Maybe we've both been meeting the wrong type of people, then!

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 07:35 PM   #26
    degen95
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by SophiaM
    Maybe we've both been meeting the wrong type of people, then!
    that's already been proven sophia!!

     
    Old 11-14-2005, 08:25 PM   #27
    Kentucky_Miss
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    Re: Playing Hard To Get

    I think there is a difference between playing hard to get and just not interested. I think people who do this actually do attract others more because it represents a challenge. Sometimes potential relationships fizzle because one of them seems too eager, and it can rub the other person the wrong way. I think if someone is playing hard to get they shouldn't do it for too long, since the other person can take offense to that and then avoid any kind of relationship with them. So, I think its good to be somewhat aloof at the start of a relationship with someone that is persuing you, it shows them you are selective, and therefore if a relationship does begin, you know that they were worth waiting for and much less likely to take them for granted.

     
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