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  • The truth. Another girl. I was right.

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    Old 01-21-2006, 03:58 PM   #121
    lady346
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    another post, sorry-

    I came to the hypothesis lately that this dental friend turned 'thing' is desirable to my ex because:
    1) shes convenient (in the program, same schedule, lives downstairs), and they were already friends so its not like he has to start completely over with someone new.

    2) having someone show interest in you, flirt and want to date you after you were such a sh** to your first love (with such disrespect and selfish immaturity, you get the picture)...well I guess it makes you feel like less of a sh**. My ex was crying to me on the phone when I was expressing my hurt less than a month ago, so I know he was guilty, felt like he failed, etc, to the point of tears. It builds up his ego that came crashing down when he felt like he failed me, and he has a pretty large one to start with so I bet his precious ego couldnt handle the feeling of ditching me and failing our relationship. This girl makes him feel like the 'special guy' that everyone always thought he was once again- kind of quickly 'erases' your wrongdoing from your conscious.

    3) Also, if there was an attraction going on when we were still together (which I think there might have been), starting something up with that person at least seems necessary to test out once you've hurt your first love so badly; otherwise, you just made a HUGE mistake and never even got to see if the grass was greener (ugh, if that was what he was trying to find out, it makes me ill).

    What do people think of this?
    My hunch is that 2 is the crux of it, yet I know it doesnt matter now and I am just dwelling and will never truly know 'why'. It just makes me feel better about myself and slightly less rejected if it may be true. I dont like feeling that his love for me was so quickly and easily expendable and replaceable. Also, I like to understand human behavior and why people seem to do this all the time after their own breakups, yet criticize others for doing it, as my very 'moral' and 'religiously-ruled' ex did. So much for the Golden Rule I thought every 'moral' person tries to follow.

    Last edited by lady346; 01-21-2006 at 04:06 PM.

     
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    Old 01-22-2006, 08:49 AM   #122
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Haha I guess no one knows what to think of the post above, as nor I.

    Just wanted to say- I met a VERY hot guy out last night and it is one of those situations where relationships really never form from it (a lounge/club). He has my # and I really dont expect him to call at all, ut it does just give me hope. There are still very good looking guys out there that think I am too and at the very least pretend they want to call me at some point in the future! and hey...thats a start.

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 10:28 AM   #123
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    City Girl,

    Being partly Middle Eastern (half-Eastern European, half-Syrian/Ukranian), I do understand Arab guys pretty well. I know that he was born and brought up in a Western culture but I am afriad that many of them always seem to grativate towards settling down with a girl who is ethnically and culturally similar to them. I am not disputing that he was genuinely interested in you, but maybe the feeling that he was getting deeper involved with you made him more realistically question the possiblitiy of a long-term committment with you. I don't know, I am only guessing. Of course, men are not the same.
    But your story reminds me of an Arab man whom I met in England, funnily enough, he was also doing a PhD in Dentistry, absolutely gorgeous. He has just broken up with an English girl, but used to talk about how they corresponded via email back and forth, and when I asked him why don't they get back together, because it was a noticeable that he was VERY fond of her, he said that it was pointless, that there won't be a happy ending to it.
    On the other hand, the Russian girls married to Syrian men in Moscow outnumber the Arab girls.
    It all depends on not only how truthful and in love he was with you, but also on how strong and determined he is! Just a thought..

    I am glad nevertheless that you are doing fine, and that you are starting to at least notice all the wonderful men out there.

    Good luck and stay strong!

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 10:33 AM   #124
    Murray67980
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Hi Citygirl. I'm glad you went out and had fun. Who cares if he calls or doesn't call... Its a nice little ego boost and God knows we both need that.

    I wish I could say my night was as fun, but it wasn't. The friends I was supose to go out with were all supose to meet at my apartment because I live down town and they all live in the suburbs. They were all going to meet at my place and then we were going to take cabs to where we were going. Well, some people were late and by the time everyone got to my place, everyone seemed content just hanging out and drinking at my apartment. Of coarse they were content, they were all couples (except my roomate who is going through a divorce but is seeing someone). I got all dressed up, got my hair done, and really tried hard to work myself up to the idea of having a good time only to sit at my apartment and listen to my married friends talk about the vacations they are taking this year and the houses they are buying. I went to my bathroom and cried for 20 minutes with nobody even noticing. I wanted to call him so bad. I wanted him to come over, put his arms around me, and tell me it will all be ok. I wanted him to be sitting at the table with everyone talking about the plans we had for our future just a few short weeks ago. I would had done anything to have him call and say he missed me. But I didn't call him. I knew it wouldn't make anything better.
    So today, I have a huge mess to clean up and then, I don't know. It's not a good day. I was doing so well yesterday, but today I can't even bring myself to move.
    I know there will be days like this. I just want it to pass.

    Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and I know they don't mean to hurt me. I don't expect their lives to be put on hold because my heart is broken. If they are excited about their vacations with their boyfriends, their first house, their marriage, they should be able to talk about it. But couldn't they have just given me one night? That's all I asked... Just one night of trying to have fun without thinking about the life I just lost, much less having it flaunted in front of my face.
    I feel hurt by not only him, but them too now.

    I need to stop feeling sorry for myself, I know. Do you have any tips for me? How can I snap out of this and feel better? Even if it's just a little better...

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 10:50 AM   #125
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Murray67980
    Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and I know they don't mean to hurt me. I don't expect their lives to be put on hold because my heart is broken. If they are excited about their vacations with their boyfriends, their first house, their marriage, they should be able to talk about it. But couldn't they have just given me one night? That's all I asked... Just one night of trying to have fun without thinking about the life I just lost, much less having it flaunted in front of my face.
    I feel hurt by not only him, but them too now.

    I need to stop feeling sorry for myself, I know. Do you have any tips for me? How can I snap out of this and feel better? Even if it's just a little better...
    Oh, Murray, I'm so sorry you're feeling sad today. It's totally understandable that your friends flaunting their vacation plans with their partners, their new houses and plans for the future made you feel depressed and hurt even more. I know it's not much help, but when I was reading this, I could feel the pain you're in because I also experience it. It's hard to talk to my coupled friends--I started avoiding everyone's phonecalls because I feel so depressed when they start talking about going away with their SO, or someone getting engaged, etc. It's like their lives are moving forward and mine is just stuck in one place. So, just wanted to say that I relate and that I think it was pretty insensitive of your friends to be talking about pleasurable couple stuff around you so soon after your break up. One good thing would be to make some new single friends you can go out with and do things with on weekends, although I haven't yet figured out how to go about it. A friend of mine suggested meeting them thru a friends site online, but it seems kinda artificial...Having some single friends who are in a similar situation would really help, I think. Even if you met just one or two people, they can lead you to meeting more people. It's a cliche suggestion, but maybe taking up a class in something that interests you might be a way to expand your social circle. I don't mean to say you should ditch all your married and coupled friends, but it looks like you're only surrounded by them. A more mixed company would be the best.

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 11:01 AM   #126
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by steakie46


    I was thinking about this today and I made myself really sad and it's kinda weird. It's just that in a way I know I could find someone who not necessarily loves me more than he did but who shows his emotions and affections, which is something mine did not do that often ( but then when he did it was so special), anyways I am getting off the point. The point that I am trying to make is that I could probably find someone who loves me more (possibly) or in a different way but I really honestly do not think he will be able to find someone who would love him as much as I did despite that fact that he didn't reciprocate so often, unless he finds a girl who is not really interested in things like that or just likes his generous (money) side. But god I loved him so much, still do. Why doesn't he want me when I want him so badly?
    This still worries me. I really don't think he will ever find another girl who loves him so and who does so much for him (and we weren't married or engaged) and only wants his love in return. I do still care for him and I want him to be happyand I don't want him to hurt like I am hurting now (how's that for fair). I just don't know, he deserves to be happy even if it's not with me. All I wanted was love, and he had a hard time with showing it, and I worry because I think a lot of girls feel the same way as i did, but I loved him enough to stay and love him just as much and never hurt him or leave, I just don't know if any other girl will.

    Ha. Sorry this post was a little dumb but I just wanted to vent and it really does help to get it out. I worry about him, I love him, and yet I am so mad at him and hurt by him (the one person I thought would never hurt me) all at the same time!!!!!

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 11:04 AM   #127
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Hey Murray, I have to say I am very surprised with how well you are doing. Right after my break-up I dont even think I could have brought myself to go out at all...actually I went home out of state for a while and laid around my parents house weeping and staring and drinking wine...haha. It was awful. I am impressed that you actually got all dressed up and had your friends over.
    To be honest, I think it is somewhat insensitive that your friends discussed their coupled lives all night with you...how hard that must have been! I cant even imagine. I am lucky in the sense that, when I was with my ex, I was the only coupled person out of my best friends (we're all 23/24 and all single now- its nice), and while all of my grad school friends are either married or coupled, I am not as close with them so it doesnt bother me as much. If anything, it gives me hope for the future by looking at them getting along so well...my ex rarely gave me the time to come out and hang out much with these people and be a couple along with everyone else when he finally moved here, so I was usually alone anyway (and when we were long-distance, I was used to being alone). I think there is somewhat of a danger when you only have a social life in groups of romantic couples. I know it is difficult when everyone gets married (or close to it) to go out alone, but when stuff happens like this, it is somewhat insensitive to just show up as moral support flashing their significant other in your face.

    On the other hand, I wonder if your friends were just trying to distract you. If they had sat with you all night and discussed your feelings and wallowed with you, that would have put a huge damper on the evening Im assuming, and didnt you say you had planned to go out? Either way, I dont know if that is the most sensitive tactic to distract you with, but they may have been trying to help you. With my friends, in the eginning I did not go out and instead I stayed in at people's houses, ordered chinese and drank wine and just talked it out with all of them. Then we'd watch a movie and the whole evening would just be a somber and supportive atmosphere...it helped in the initial stages to just get it out and that way I didnt have to be hurt by people talking about their coupled vacations- you're not ready for that yet.

    As for advice- I am the type of person that has no qualms whatsoever about discussing my feelings, showing my emotions (if theyre exaggerated, I dont care, its how I feel at the time), and wallowing. For me, my first week was spent in denial. I stared, I cried, yet I did OK. It was the 2nd week when I talked to him and got some depressing and confusing answers that I became a nutcase. However, the way I deal with things is to just get it ALL out of my system, in all ways, and then pull myself together after Im tired of doing that, and take it step-by-step from then on.
    I had a friend last night who told me that: break-ups are the equivalent of someone extremely close and intimate to you dying, except maybe even more HURTFUL because you know they CHOSE to leave you. This really resonated with me. She said she doesnt find it fair that society allows people all the time in the world to grieve and be depressed, over an actual death, and this is seen as NORMAL and expected, whereas if people do that after break-ups, it is seen as weak, neurotic, and crazy. She also said that, in my situation, the real grieving and response to the break-up should have begun this past Tuesday when I found out about the 'female friend', and I think she is right; because it changed everything, it snapped me into reality. Hes moving on, not coming back. Our relationship is really dead to me, etc. I was dragged along for so long, kept harboring hope due to what he was saying, and assumed he was mourning me like I was mourning him. Now that I see that that is not the case at all and hes a liar and Ive been replaced, I feel like, while I had a head-start with the healing process, I am NOW really going through it.
    So for you, heres what I would do. If you have to call him, call him. It might make you look weak and it might not help things, but I do not regret going a little emotional and crazy on him. I was honest with my feelings. I laid it all out on the table, and I was true to myself. It made me feel worse when he would selfishly yell back at me ("you're hurting MY feelings". Please.) and tell me really devastating answers to my questions ("I dont love you anymore"). However, at least I helped myself out...I wanted to call him, I did. I didnt self-sacrifice anymore because he might not like me calling him. I did enough of that when we were together.
    Eventually I got over that and cut him out. Now, this new girl thing is horrible to think about, but I really just try to push it out of my head. Let yourself mourn, grieve, get it ALL out and over with, and eventually you will get tired of crying. You are mourning a loss. It is normal, even though society might say otherwise. After that, do what you have been doing. Cram your social life up so that you still realize you can have fun and he didnt ruin that for you. I have seen visual proof that mine is out having a blast, so why shouldn't I? Lay around and mope all you want for awhile (I still am, my room is a mess). Write on these boards, they really help. Try to compliment yourself ALL the time and pick out the things that you find rare in yourself. Make yourself look as hot as possible all the time, it will help you feel attractive and boost your confidence. When you have mental images, try to push them out (this step comes later). I am still having a hard time there but the more I try to consciously block it out, the easier it is.
    Over time, we will be oK. I am still right here with you so I think you are doing very well considering how early this is! You are being very mature and I wish I had had the composure that you do, but I am too passionate of a person and I let my emotions overcome me in front of him. Oh well! He can deal...and I'll find my pride again, haha. I hope this helps in any way possible.

    Last edited by lady346; 01-22-2006 at 11:08 AM.

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 11:21 AM   #128
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    I went through the same thing. Grieving for the intial breakup and then finding out he was hanging out with another girl 3 weeks later. It proably would have been a shock when he told me on the phone except that i already had my suspicions. It still hurt so bad, though. I'm sure he thought it was weird that when he told me I didn't really say anything or ask more than a few questions, but like I said I already knew. Normally if i didn't know I probably would have not said anything and starting crying and then asked a million questions. I tried to stay calm and composed and not talk about her, but about us and what was going on (but didn't get too much out of it). My personality is the same CG I am totally emotional and honest and have no problem showing it. Sometimes it's not such a good thing though, but I wear my heart on my sleeve and that's just how I am. I agree with the death grieving, too. It is so painful. One of hardest things for me is the lack of friends. I have family but the only person I can talk to about it is my mom, but I think she is getting a little angry with me for being so down about it (angry in that she is worried about me). I don't get along with my dad, and I don't talk to my brothers about this kind of thing. My best friend is my cousin but she is usually pretty busy, and other than that I don't really have friends that I hang out with. So it's pretty lonely, I always hung out with my ex and his friends. Thank goodness for HB friends to talk to and get advice from! I still don't even have a room at my house, it's been over a month, so that sucks, but I think when I do get my room in order that will make it a little better. I just feel lost. I lost my best friend and my love. I just miss all the little things, holding hands, rubbing his head and tummy, laughing together, etc. And it sucks to think he's doing these things I loved so much with someone else.

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 12:26 PM   #129
    Murray67980
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    break-ups are the equivalent of someone extremely close and intimate to you dying, except maybe even more HURTFUL because you know they CHOSE to leave you.

    This is so true. People have told me to look at it like a death too. But the fact that he "chose" to leave makes that impossible. I can't greive because he is still here. All I do is wonder what he is doing and if he's as miserable as I am. But of coarse he's not
    or else he would be with me.

    I find myself turning off my phone b/c it hurts too much to hear it ring and see it's not him calling. But then I find myself turning it back on and checking my voice mails hoping one will be from him. But nothing...

    I'm not as strong as you may think. I called him crying hysterically on Friday. I even threatened to kill myself (not so bluntly, but something along the lines of "I can't drive and I wish someone would hit and kill me")...
    I never thought I could say something so immature. Do I really want him to come back for that reason? I just lost it and last night I almost lost it again. But I just keep thinking about how worse I felt after the first psycho moment.
    It probably just makes it easier for him to leave without guilt if he thinks I'm nuts. Instead I am going to take your advise, make myself look better than ever, and show him that I am just fine without him. When I need to cry, I will,. When I need to scream, I will. But not in front of him. I hope I can keep this promise to myself.
    I see him at work, so it is impossible to forget about him and block him out completly. I need to show him that he lost a great girl. He will regret it. I just hope that when he does, I am strong enough to not take him back.
    He has to regret it. I know he loved me.
    How does that kind of love just go away?

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 12:56 PM   #130
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    And you know what? If you need to scream in front of him, do it. Do things FOR YOU from now on. Whatever makes you feel better, do it. There are limits of course, but for now, its OK. And dont worry about being immature- I've been there. Its normal, we're hurt. Cause he most likely isn't coming back, and if he would, it wouldn't matter anyway, since you CAN'T give him a THIRD chance. No no no. You gave him a 2nd one, which most people don't do anyway, and you can't give him a third, you're obviously not worthy of his rollercoaster emotions. You've lost his trust not once, but twice. Who does he think he is?
    It is hard that you see him at work, but I think maybe you should start looking for another job? You're in school so its not like its your career, am I right? I mean, its hard- I dont know actually- part of me thinks you shouldnt have to upheave your life for him while he can stay at work and chill, but part of me thinks you will heal much faster once you dont have to see him everyday.

    I have an update with my feelings on things, I wanted to share on this thread:

    Im finally back to where I was! Had a conversation with good friend. We agreed on how selfish he is and how it is etter this way. Hes not who I thought he was yes, and it is devastating, but I think that better yet- he is not who HE thought he was. It was easier for him to give me up than to change.

    I will never take mine back. He is inherently selfish, egotistical, and thinks he's some religious saint who does no wrong. He took and took all I had to give him and when it came down to giving, it wasn't happening. It was always about HIM. I think he needs people that make him feel good, and that is why he left me- not about culture, relig, or dental stress (such crap). I think I made him realize how selfish he really was when I started to complain how he took me for granted, and it made him feel bad about himself, so he left. He needs someone submissive who will give him everything as I did, yet NOT expect it back. I think I put him on a pedastool and he idolizes himself too it seems. As much as he treated me well I think I looked at his religious morals and persona as something that was like god's gift, and he took that and ran with it. And while he really did treat me amazingly well and its hard to mourn the loss of that, he hurt me very badly and then was self-righteous aout it. Plus, when push come to shove, he didnt want to do things for me when I needed them if it conflicted with his 'wants', and he was never appreciative of all I sacrificed for him. Good luck to him in the future!! All in all, thats a pretty big 'con' if you cant give someone you love so much some equality. That girl can have him, if she can put up with the inequality than she is half the woman that I am because no one should be taken advantage like that. I was not religious, but I give more everyday to the human race than he ever has in his lifetime with what I do in my profession and eveyday life. So if anyone comes out of this as someone that should be missed, its me! Haha. I shouldn't miss him, its his loss.

    I am better without him. I really am. Had I stayed with him, it would have eaten away at me over time. I like this place I'm at!

    So Murray- maybe try to focus on how he's 37 and he cant get his ***** together. Focus on how immature he is that he has to come back to you a second time and STILL cant be true to you. Focus on the flaws in your relationship and how if he can leave you twice, he doesnt deserve you. Ive never met the guy, so Im sure you can do even better than me with these flaws. This will help immensely toward the healing process, I promise

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 01:09 PM   #131
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Thanks citygirl! I am trying to think about his flaws. Suprisingly, there are more than I thought
    I loved him despite them, but I don't have to anymore.

    I have been with my job for 5 years. They pay well and are totally flexible with my school schedule. I don't think I could find a place that would allow me to earn enough for rent and bills while also letting me put school first. But trust me, I am looking! In the mean time, I just have to treat him like evryone else in the office. This will not be easy but I have to do what is best for me. I can't risk making less money, or prolonging school all because he is messed up and doesn't know what he wants. If he can't handle it, he can find another job!

    I am off to my parents now. It makes me so happy to hear how much better you feel! I gives me hope that I will too soon enough!
    Have a great day!
    Thanks for all of your help. I would have gone crazy without these boards. It's like therapy!

     
    Old 01-24-2006, 08:50 PM   #132
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Ive been posting my updates on the thread "To Murray" because I know a few of us are going through break-ups, but I wanted to update here because so many others of you have given me such insightful advice.
    Its been a lot etter for me this week- Ive even been able to go back to giving people advice and actually believing the things I tell people! Ive been able to push stuff out of my head (mental images) and even watched a whole movie tonight alone in my room (used to do this quite often on a tired evening) and it was fine.) This time, I could concentrate and actually enjoyed my own company Ive enjoyed my life lately and have actually smiled walking down the street and danced around in my room to my music...so its been good!

    However, I ran errands today after class for about 3 hours, and went aalll over the place downtown and of course had to walk through his neighorhood. I kept clear of his avenue but I was around his street and within a ten-block radius. It was hard. I am always so scared I will run into or see him, or him and her, or he'll see me from afar...whichever. So Im alone, walking around for hours with my ipod just thinking about him again...running scenarios in my head, etc etc. Now I usually love spending time with myself, especially running my errands and shopping around the city and just people-watching (I love new york!). And I refuse to avoid any area and go out of my way just ecause I 'might' see him. He has ruined my life enough, I will still live my daily life the same. However, as soon as I got up in my area away from down there, these feelings diminished.

    What I still cant put out of my head right now are just the mental images of them two together, and its funny because I dont even know the status of their relationship. So who knows how accurate I really am...but one general one that consistently pops into my head that is painful is them being in their group of friends, yet still acting like a couple, all in different situations (sitting together at dinner, him paying for her, dancing at a club all night together, going on a vacation with friends and sleeping together in the same room/bed). It is just hard.

    I am interested in opinions on this. How can someone move on so quickly and it doesnt affect them at all? How can they easily replace their first love of 2 years who they wanted to marry, all in a month's time (with a FRIEND for that matter, that he met 4 months ago). Now, Ive seen girls do it to guys just the same, its not only guys; however, given my situation, can any guys give me a male opinion? Why didn't he mourn me, or miss me, or have a hard time jumping in with someone new? He can cry on the phone to me 3 weeks efore he all of a sudden has a new development with this friend? How is that humanly possible to do...shouldn't you have a hard time or miss the person and feel wierd? Especially after you blatantly said "I want to be alone", "No Im not dating _____(her name), why would you think that", and "I will just think of you if I try to date anyone else".

    I just cant understand how he could do this and just not be phased by the memories of us, or miss me and feel wierd about this new person. It just seems so easy and carefree for him to do this. I will never know the answer because I am trying to get over him (and somewhat succeeding...Im so angry and hateful) and I know I will never talk to him again. I just don't get it, you think you know someone so well and that their love for you could never go away overnight...
    *and let me just add that 5 days before he 'needed to be alone' and broke up with me, I spent the night, & he was pouring out to me how he loved me and I was being so patient with his coldness and a**hole-ishness...Im still so disgusted by all of it.

    Last edited by lady346; 01-24-2006 at 08:53 PM.

     
    Old 01-25-2006, 06:35 AM   #133
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Anyone have comments on the above? Had another dream about him and her (first one in a while) and I just cant shake this feeling that hes moved on and forgotten me so fast and I have no idea how someone can do that...in the course of 2 months, tops, from leading up to the breakup to the new girl...after 2 years?

    *also, due to a raving review, I watched "The Way We Were" last night...well, lets just say I could relate. Guess i always loved him more even though I never knew it until now.

    Last edited by lady346; 01-25-2006 at 07:04 AM.

     
    Old 01-25-2006, 07:22 AM   #134
    susieq0726
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by citygirl23
    Anyone have comments on the above? Had another dream about him and her (first one in a while) and I just cant shake this feeling that hes moved on and forgotten me so fast and I have no idea how someone can do that...in the course of 2 months, tops, from leading up to the breakup to the new girl...after 2 years?

    *also, due to a raving review, I watched "The Way We Were" last night...well, lets just say I could relate. Guess i always loved him more even though I never knew it until now.

    Citygirl,

    I think he had feelings about breaking it off with you long before he actually told you. This would explain how it's much easier for him to move on. In his mind it was probably over a long time ago. Many years ago I had a guy do the same thing to me. I couldn't believe how he just quit loving me and started dating someone else so quickly. When the truth finally came out, he had fallen out of love with me LONG before we actually split up, and he had already been interested in starting a new relationship with another woman. Funny thing was, after I got over the original pain and heartache, we became the best of friends.
    You will get through this.

     
    Old 01-25-2006, 07:28 AM   #135
    lady346
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    Re: The truth. Another girl. I was right.

    I guess that is it...but in Sept. (2 months before the break-up) we were going on and on about how we loved each other so much and how we felt out love was heightened so much upon his moving here. Our intimacy was better, we saw each other all the time, we went on dates and he said 'that was one of the best nights we've had...' It was like a honeymoon, I was so happy.
    Then all of a sudden, dental exams hit and it stopped, and then he got wishy-washy (sometimes he was loving, most of the time no). Just one month later, broke up with me, dragged it out for a month saying he didnt know if it was over, cried to me on the phone a month ago, and a week later is now seeing his friend.
    It is probably the right explanation, susieq. I guess I just never saw it coming, and don't see how anyone would, especially when he was doing to me what he did above...
    I will get through this, I just hope i can trust again. I put every ounce of my trust in him to get hugely betrayed.

    Last edited by lady346; 01-25-2006 at 07:31 AM.

     
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