Lost the baby at ten weeks..couldn't believe what I was seeing....

Well I really hate that I have to post this...I would have been ten weeks thursday...My first concern came when at my ten weeks I started to have brown blood spots...This past tuesday, then on wednesday started passing little red brown chips...I started praying to the lord like I have never prayed before..That is when my hopes all went down I knew I was starting to miscarry...My doctor made an appointment yesterday at 3:20...As soon as she put the ultrasound on I saw no heartbeat...She looked at every angle..I yelled out I know you don't see a heartbeat...My eight week five day checkup went so well..They baby grew from five weeks and the heart was strong...Then now as I was seeing the baby grow even more, but just had no heartbeat...That was really hard to take...She told me that there was nothing I did to harm the pregnancy, stress she said is a myth...That miscarriage's happen from the chromosomes not forming right which leads the baby to abort itself... I told her I really want a dnc..I didn't want to see what was going to pass, since I had a previous miscarriage at six weeks it was aweful then...But a part of me wanted it to pass naturally...As it did last night at 1am...I got up to start having the cramps sat on the toilet to feel like a clot just passed...I got up to look down to see the placenta (which I knew it was because they say it is grey) then right next to it..I couldn't believe my eyes..Two little blue eyes looking at me...I said that can't be the baby that small...Two inches long...I ran to my bed to get my husband to look, at first he said he didn't want to see then he did..I couldn't stand the fact of flushing my baby after seeing those eyes...I took the baby out of the toilet..Put the baby in a cup, when all the features starting pointing out at me...The baby's little eyes, nose, mouth...The baby's little arm's fingers..The baby's little legs toes...And for what I could see the genital's looked like I was going to be having another boy..I did not want to flush my baby down the toilet...I told my husband lets go bury the baby somewhere special....My husband came over to look as we both broke down and cried...Why Lord did this have to happen, I tell myself I don't understand the reasons why, as I know the lord as his own reason's..But in time I will understand....As this can only make my husband and I stronger...I can only say the lord did let me see my baby, which I am grateful for since I was going to have an appointment for a dnc on monday...The lord at least answered that prayer for me...I wanted the baby to pass last night as the baby did..
I would love to know if anyone had a story like mine..I told my husband I can only imagine what women go through further along with pregnancy and a miscarriage takes place...The hardest thing I have ever had to deal with I have to say was this..This was our baby HOPE our little angel to watch over us for our new pregnancy to come....

Oh, My Gosh, what a story. I'm so sorry about your loss.
I also miscarried at 10 weeks. I didn't know the baby had died until my 12 week ultrasound. It was horrifying to be sitting in the waiting room talking about names and the baby's room. etc. then go inside to see my baby on the screen with no heartbeat. I too, kept saying out loud to the Tech, There's no heartbeat, he should be moving, etc. and she just stood there cold as ice, trying to wiggle my belly as we watched my dead baby just float on the screen. It was so horrible.
I had a D&C that night, so I didn't pass the baby. It's so amazing you were able to see so much of his features.
I'm now ttc again. Now that the hormones are completely out of my body, it's a little easier to deal with the pain.
I hope you heal soon.
JellyB

Gretchie, I am so sorry for your loss and I'm so glad you did not flush the toilet. I have just said a prayer for you and for your baby in heaven with God. I had a miscarriage 8 years ago and I was six weeks along, but did not see anything out of the ordinary, but I always clotted heavily. I was pregnant the very next month and had a beautiful son, who is now 7 and I'm TTC#2 now.

Melly

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Words can't make you feel better, I know, but I'll pray for you and your family. I understand completely about not wanting to flush a child down the toilet. Having even the smallest grave to leave flowers at may help you heal..in time.

I lost my first child at twenty weeks so we had a body to bury also. I was far enough along to have a funeral and a burial plot for my son. My second child was lost at nine weeks and had a d&c immediately so I never got to see that child's remains. As strange as this may sound, I think you were blessed with being able to see what gender your child was. I wish I knew about my second angel.

Again, I'm so sorry. I'll be praying for you.

So Sorry for your loss.. I am glad that your hubby was there to handle things with you. You will both be fine..

take care of yourself. You are a beautiful person.

sorry to hear about your recent loss. I had 2 miscarriages at 7 weeks and they came away naturally however I did not see anything just had lots of clots. I also lost a baby last february at 19 weeks and for me one of the worst things is that he was born with his eyes open and for some reason that really bothered me.

All I can say is that I kind of know what youre going through and everyday will be hard for a long while I wish you all the best in your next pregnancy and wanted you to know that you are not alone take care of yourself. xxx

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I had a D and E done for my "Missed Miscarriage" at 8wks but when I woke out of anesthesia I was in hysterics begging to see my baby. I just wanted to see it one time before they did whatever cold thing they do with it at that age. They adamantly refused. In fact I got so adamant they restrained me and sedated me because I began demanding my husband to come help me see the baby.

I will always wonder if my loss/pain would have been lessened by seeing him/her even if it would have been in a jar or something. I think it would have. It was my baby and I should have had the right to see it if I wanted, in my opinion.

I'm very happy that you got to make that connection with your baby even if it was fleeting and couldn't last.

I wish you the best TTC luck in the future - when the time is right for you.
M.K.