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    Old 06-11-2008, 06:41 PM   #16
    jerry111165a
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    theres a reason for everything.

    Goodnight, and god bless.

    jerry.

     
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    Old 06-11-2008, 07:14 PM   #17
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by lizzy76 View Post
    I may just be really paranoid (I guess guilt can do that to me!) but I really do think that the doctor reported me. I haven't heard anything yet from anyone regarding this
    And you won't....Because nothing is going to happen....Trust me on this. You have the support of both Docs...That is HUGE. There can't be any action w/o @ least one of them throwing you under the bus. Even if one of them did, these things don't happen overnight.

    Quote:
    the interaction between me and the doctor and then my mom and the doctor got a little "heated" at times and I'd say the whole thing lasted about 10 minutes and the guy was very upset when we were done.
    This demonstrates his serious lack of professionalism. Even if he was right, you don't act like this. He was playing the role of judge, jury, and executioner.

    Quote:
    He also kept saying that he had a "gut feeling" that something just wasn't right and that he was going to find out what was going on. When he would say that he had this look on his face like "you are so beneath me and I've caught you now" kind of thing.
    This is what happens when someone thinks they are "smarter" and "better" than someone else. His "gut feeling" is gonna get him embarrassed because if he tries to investigate, he'll get slammed. Again...Good that you got to your Docs first. If he hasn't called either one of them, then he's not going to do anything.

    Quote:
    I just got off the phone with my urologist and he was upset.
    I'm sure he was.....Because he knows you're in pain and what you've gone through. He also knows about the medical ethical oath of "do no harm." Obviously, this ER Doc trampled all over that one!

    Quote:
    He told me that I need to be an advocate for myself and write a letter to the hospital about this guy. He said that if this guy does do anything that he'll give me documentation of my history and to not worry about anything. That was a relief.
    I would agree...To a point. I think I'd call the hospital administrator and just have a nice conversation with him. Stay calm and tell him that you don't want to file any type of official complaint, but you're calling as a "compromise" as your Doc wanted you to file an official complaint. Tell him that you just wanted him to know about what happened so that maybe he could counsel the ER Doc to follow his oath of "do no harm" and have some compassion.

    Tell the administrator that you want to keep this type of thing from happening to someone else. Tell him that you came to the ER because you were in major pain and ironically, this ditwit caused you extreme anxiety and made your pain skyrocket. Tell him about all your surgeries and problems with stones. Tell him what made you most upset is that he totally scoffed @ your medical history and flat out refused to consider the documentation and medical references you were trying to provide. Tell him that he had the attitude that he knew more about you in a quick and simple evaluation than all the prior history you were trying to share. I think the administrator will appreciate you calling and not making a huge deal out of it. Trust me on this....Docs almost always have each other's back....Your Uro wouldn't have made the recommendation unless he felt that the Doc was completely out of line.

    Quote:
    this current situation has scared me SOOOO much that I will never ever go to the ER unless I absolutely need to! For a day or two after this happened I couldn't even eat - my stomach was in knots about this. I had visions of the police searching my apartment, going through stuff on my computer, coming to my work to search things, etc.
    I can understand your point.....But, I hope you don't suffer needlessly. But, I can see why you would be gun shy.

    Quote:
    Exec - I had to laugh at your translation below ""I know everything....I don't care what you have, who I should call." He basically did say that! When I was trying to give him two different doctors to call he refused to take their information and said "I can make my own decisions".
    Glad I could provide some comic relief! (LOL)

    Quote:
    I think I'll still be worried about this until some time has gone by and I haven't heard anything.
    Stop worrying about it....NOTHING is going to happen. It's over!

    Quote:
    I know it's kind of complicated... addiction vs dependence, needing pain meds for real stuff but also knowing that I abuse the meds... it's such a fine line to walk and I hope that someday I won't need to take any meds, or that I can find an alternative to taking pain meds...
    To be honest, I think one of the reasons you want the meds is because you probably aren't being properly & adequately treated....You probably get "down" and don't feel well....Therefore, your brain wants the meds to make you feel better. If you could get stabilized on a good PM program with a long acting med that levels you out and avoids the "ups and downs", you may do a lot better. Just my .02.

    Quote:
    Thank you all for your replies and support and thoughts on this whole situation.
    Glad I could help. Return the favor to someone else one day.

    Hope all goes well with you, and good luck.

    Ex

    Last edited by Executor; 06-11-2008 at 07:54 PM.

     
    Old 06-12-2008, 09:05 AM   #18
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    I looked into what filiing an official complaint would entail and I've decided not to do it. It seems best to just let things go and lay low, although I do like the idea of calling the administrator and just having a conversation. I think I may do that soon... it would get this off my chest and would feel good to know that at least someone at that hospital knows more about my history, etc.

    At one point my primary care doctor suggested that I go see a pain specialist but I never followed through with things. I guess at the time I didn't think that the pain specialist could do anything more for me than my doctor already was. After all, he was/is prescribing me norco each month so what more is there? Since then I've learned a little more about PM but I'm still not sure if seeing a specialist would help, although I guess it couldn't hurt.

    I'm starting to relax with this situation - I think you're right in that if he were going to contact my doctors he would have done that already. And after speaking with my doctors and getting their support and knowing that I have a ton of documentation for things, I think that even if he were to report me that my surgeries and history would speak for themselves. I would definitely still be stressing big time if it weren't for your reassurance and logical arguements!

    And don't worry Exec, I'll pay it forward and return the favor someday

     
    Old 06-12-2008, 09:20 AM   #19
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    i would most definitely call the administrator!! this jerk needs to know he can't treat people that way and get away with it!! i really hope you call, and if you do, let us know what happens!

     
    Old 06-13-2008, 08:44 PM   #20
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    I ended up seeing the head of our security at happy hour tonight. I was able to run a bunch of questions by him - for a "friend" of course! He has a long list of credentials in the police force, working alongside the FBI, solving cases like the LA Strangler, stuff like that. He's been around the block and then some!

    So I gave him the story without giving him the little details, and of course this was for a "friend". Basically I wanted to know what happens when a doctor says they're going to report you. He said that there's no way this guy is going to report me. By reporting me this guy is going to have to give up a TON of his time and he needs very strong proof that the person is drug seeking, which is almost impossible to get. He would be putting his practice on the line (or assetts if he doesn't have a practice) because if they find fault with what he did he there will be consequences to that as well.

    Even though I've had all of this reassurance, I think the only thing that will allow me to completely relax will be time. As time goes by and nothing has happened then I'll feel as though I can truly put this behind me. BUT - I am way less stressed right now and I owe that you to you guys!! Well, and to the head of our security!

    So basically he's positive that the doctor was trying to scare me. The process is just too long and too dangerous for the doctor as well. Not to mention the amount of time he'd have to spend on things... its more than just a phone call - he didn't tell me all of what's involved but I guess it's pretty involved. He's also said that he's heard of some pretty stupid things patients do to get drugs (blatent stuff) and the doctor's wouldn't turn them in because of the whole process...

    I'm feeling a lot better about things! First off, you all helped me to relieve some of the stress I was having earlier, and now our head of security has really relieved some stress that was kind of lingering and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

    Last edited by lizzy76; 06-13-2008 at 08:47 PM. Reason: forgot something

     
    Old 06-14-2008, 05:14 PM   #21
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Just an FYI - my mom is writing a letter to the hospital from a Nurses point of view and then she may add in some things from a mother's point of view, or bystander's view, but either way she's writing a letter! I'm debating on calling the administrator... my mom said I wouldn't get right through to him, which I figured, but I'm going to get there somehow and just tell her that "I'm thinking about reporting this to the Medical Board or to JAACHO (sp?) but that I'd rather keep it casual" and just let her know what happened and how I felt about things, and how my other doctors felt about things. So that's the plan...

    Last edited by lizzy76; 06-14-2008 at 05:15 PM.

     
    Old 06-14-2008, 06:20 PM   #22
    Lou1
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Lizzy

    Rather than looking at ways of "getting back" at this guy, let's look at the much bigger...and more important picture:

    Things are looking pretty good that you won't be facing any sort of real trouble from this ER doctor...let's thank our Higher Power that you don't have to worry about any sort of legal issues.

    Now, for what I perceive to be the MUCH more important issue...what are we going to do about this situation? In my mind, the focus should not be trying to file complaints against the guy in the ER....but let's look at what you are GOING TO DO (meaning what sort of life changes)...to prevent this sort of thing from possibly re-occurring. To me, THAT should be your priority.

    You yourself have admitted that you have abused ER visits as a means to get prescriptions issued. Rather than focus all this energy on thinking of all sorts of ways to get to the administrator to protest against what you felt was inappropriate behavior, expend these energies and emotions on altering your lifestyle in such a manner that you don't ever find yourself in an Emergency Room again unless absolutely necessary.
    Whether it be a 12-step program or whatever, you should start to devote yourself to developing a healthy, drug-free way of living. And I am certainly sympathetic to walking that thin line between addiction and pain management when you have legitimate health issues that require medical attention.
    If you HAVE to take narcotic medications for legitimate issues, develop the discipline to strictly follow the doctor's prescribing instructions, even if that means having a trusted family member hold your meds for you.

    I am not trying to minimize in any way what happened to you at the ER with that jerk of a doctor. I certainly agree that you were treated poorly and DO have a legitimate complaint...I just do not want to see the REAL issue get lost.

    I hope things work out for you and you find peace and pain-free happiness.

    Take care,
    Lou

     
    Old 06-14-2008, 06:51 PM   #23
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Hi

    Gotta say I am in agreement with Lou on this. Yes, it was an upsetting experience. And scary. And worrisome.

    It was also a heck of a learning experience. Whether his demeanor was professional or not, the doctor did actually make the correct call, Lizzy. You were drug seeking. However the doctor made the call, perhaps gut instinct, he called it as it truly was.

    One of the coping skills I am developing in my own recovery is to face situations with as much honesty as I can. It was not the proudest moment of my life some months back when I ended up in ER in really bad pain and one of the first things I had to say was that I had recently just finished tapering off pain killers that I had abused. However, I had to do it. It was making myself not hide from what I did not want to have to do because that is a necessary part of staying in sobriety.

    I guess, Lizzy, that I am saying that we have to find what is good for us in each situation and let that good thing be our guide in our reactions. The good thing in this is that Doc called it right and you did not get meds just for the sake of wanting meds. It could have been a much sadder story if you had gotten them and had to face another episode of continuing misuse and abuse of them.

    Find the balance, Lizzy. Strive for the balance always. It is such a necessary need to do so if we truly want the thinking to change. Use this incident as a means of growing in your convictions.

    With good thoughts of you
    reach

    Last edited by reachout; 06-15-2008 at 06:16 AM.

     
    Old 06-14-2008, 08:34 PM   #24
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Sorry I haven't checked in for a couple of days.

    I suggested a call to the administrator as a "middle ground" type of strategy....You want to let the hospital know what happened....Scare him a bit....Kinda ironic isn't it.....But, not file a formal complaint, and put yourself and the Doc though an exhaustive process. I really think the administrator would be appreciative that you don't make a big deal out of it....Sort of like when one gets a "warning" from the police officer after getting, pulled over rather than a ticket. Both can have the same effect.

    You have absolutely NOTHING to worry about re: him reporting you. Even if he did, he won't get anywhere without one of your two Docs jumping on the bandwagon (with him). Their both in your corner. You have done nothing wrong. You are perfectly legal / allowed to get meds from different Docs as long as there is medical need and you're not be outwardly fraudulent.

    Hope all is well.

    Ex

     
    Old 06-15-2008, 07:56 AM   #25
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Hi Lizzy.

    I'm glad that reachout and lou stepped in to talk about honesty and recovery. The doctor was right, this time, and maybe he shouldn't be punished for his action (it's like being accused of comitting a crime when you're innocent).

    That stuff that I said about my nurse practitoner friend who got into trouble because she was wrong (maybe she was wrong???) about a patient who was in pain, and she got into trouble because the patient complained was to ease your mind about the doctor's threats. My real hope was that "honesty" would rule the day, and everything would come out right. You lost some sleep and stressed for a while; however, you had it coming. Now, if the doctor does that to somebody who is in really bad pain, then that would be catastrophic for the patient, and the doctor DESERVES to be punished.

    On the other hand, a reprimand would be appropriate to keep the doctor from judging patients based on his "gut feeling." In this case, he was right. Gut feelings, however, can be misleading as well.

    Good luck. I know that you will make the right decision. In this case, he was right. Should he be punished? It's your call. Has he pulled that stunt on patients that are in real need? Who knows. However, if he ever does, it will come back and bite him. It's like those of us who misuse drugs. We pay the price, eventually.

    God bless and stay strong,

    mike

     
    Old 06-15-2008, 03:45 PM   #26
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    I agree with you all.... I'm not going to write the letter. I was thinking about writing it because he did a lot of things inappropriately and he was doing it based on nothing. That upset me because that very same situation (having nothing show up on the CT scan but still having a kidney stone and real pain) has happened to me before and so this guy was wrong about a lot of things he said - i.e. everything shows up on a CT scan, etc.

    BUT, that aside, I do know and have admitted to you guys that I was not there for a real stone. I just wanted the pain meds. Mike, don't worry about your comment about your friend - it did relieve me and I appreciate that. I'm really trying to be completely honest with everyone... I've only been honest with a small group of people, including you all (although I guess you all constite a much larger group lol).

    I was honest with my psychiatrist this week when I told him about the situation so that's a start. He wants me to speak with my urologist and let him know about my addiction problems. The urologist will still need to prescribe meds when a kidney stone comes around again but when that happens he'll know all about my addiction and we'll be able to work something out so that I'll be comfortable and not in pain, but at the same time won't be able to abuse the meds prescribed. For me that's a HUGE step and I'm so nervous!!! But like I've said, this whole experience basically scared the crap out of me and I'm going to be walkin' the line from now on! So I've got to start taking hard steps like this.

    Has anyone here talked to their doctors about this - come clean about things? And knowing that you most likely will need pain meds at some point in the future? How did they react? I'm afraid my uro won't give me meds and I'm afraid he's going to drop me. I've honestly never abused the meds he's given me... I've always needed them for very real pain so maybe that will help... don't know.

    Again, I appreciate everyone's insight and help here. I really do.

     
    Old 06-15-2008, 04:02 PM   #27
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Hi Lizzy

    Girl, I know how hard you are working to find the balance. That surely was a huge step to spill it to the psychiatrist and I applaud the huge effort I know that took. Good for you.

    Yes, I did get straight up with every single doctor who treated me ... oncologist, heart guy, family doctor, surgeon... all of them. The week after I started tapering, I called every office and told them I wanted it put into my records that I was withdrawing from opiates and Xanax. I wanted the safety nets in place for me in case I started backing down. Then as I saw each doctor on visits, we simply talked about it and all was cool. It has not stopped getting a med when it is truly needed... like when I went to the Emergency Room, I was given morphine shots and sent home with a script for Vicoden, which was handed to my husband. Everything was upfriont and worked out well. I am not afraid anymore about being left in pain because I have found that the doctors all appreciated the honesty and now can work in the best way with me and my situation.

    Take the path step by step there, Lizzy. Every step we take, whether hard or easy, is progress. We are all works in progress as long as we keep on stepping.

    Hugs
    reach

     
    Old 06-16-2008, 07:46 PM   #28
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    I wish you well on your road to recovery.

     
    Old 06-17-2008, 10:34 AM   #29
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    Wow Reach! That's such an amazing and courageous thing you did by coming clean with all of your docs. It really gives me hope and encouragement to do it with all of my docs - I've already done it with my psychologist and will be doing it shortly with my urologist, but I've been chickening out as far as my primary care doc goes. I think it's because he prescribes me norco each month for my GI problem and I'm afraid that he'll discontinue things. But I guess even if he does stop seeing me I can find someone else and start out the doctor/patient honestly, with everything out on the table at the first appointment.

    As for going to the ER in the future (for legit stones or GI stuff) I really like taking the honesty approach.. go figure! It feels more comfortable than being honest about some things and leaving other stuff out. Knowing that they can't refuse to treat my pain I think that being upfront with them will hopefully put their mind at ease that I'm drug seeking. We'll see... at the rate I've been getting kidney stones (every 5 months or so) my next ER visit could be just around the corner... which also gives me a good reason to talk to my uro sooner than later because I'd hate to come clean with the ER doc before my uro and to have him hear about things from someone else besides me. Not good for having a trustworthy relationship!

    Boxerluver - thanks for your encouragement! I'm going to continue to update as things move along - with my doctors and my recovery efforts.

     
    Old 06-17-2008, 10:40 AM   #30
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    Re: HELP! An ER doc said he's reporting me

    I forgot one thing --- so far I haven't heard anything from my doctors or the State or anyone about this guy reporting me. I did however have a dream last night that I got a letter from the nurse who on that day telling me to expect a letter from the doctor saying that he reported me and that he knows my life is over from now on! I guess this has been on my mind more than I thought!

    As time has gone by, and as I've talked with my doctors, and the encouragement of everyone here - and all of your logical points that you've made - this hasn't been consciously on my mind but I suppose it's still in my subconscious mind somewhere!

     
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