It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Addiction & Recovery Message Board

  • Taking a deep breath



  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 02-17-2009, 08:47 AM   #1
    magdolene
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    magdolene's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Corydon, IN USA
    Posts: 12
    magdolene HB User
    Taking a deep breath

    Greetings to all! I have been lurking about on this board taking in all of the incredible stories everyone has. I am hoping I can join you because all of my efforts to conquer my alcoholism have failed.
    I am 34 and have been drinking for a decade. I became a binge drinker quickly after initially trying to escape panic attacks. For the most part, I was able to function around my drinking, but through the past year I have nearly lost my job and I had to stop my efforts at futhering my education. Of course those issues merely scratch the surface, and I am running out of excuses that hide the problem.
    I am an intelligent woman. I have researched the various methods of overcoming addiction and actually work in a field that deals with this sort of thing. I just can't seem to overcome this cycle of escaping, feeling even worse the next day.. Then beating myself up for it all day until I feel I must escape again. The ridiculous part of this is now it seems like I am drinking to escape from drinking. Gosh.... I know better.
    Thanks for any and all input! - M

     
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 02-17-2009, 12:11 PM   #2
    Secrets1983
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Secrets1983's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jul 2008
    Location: USA
    Posts: 1,298
    Secrets1983 HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Hello and WELCOME!

    Of course you are welcome to join! We may not have the same drug of choice but addiction is addiction no matter what our preferences are.

    It's funny how we do our frug of choice... it makes us feel like crap so we end up doing more to try and make that feeling go away only to find out in the end that we have made things 100 x's worse. It may not be something all people can understand but it certainly is something that a fellow addict can..... So, you are not alone! I completely understand!

    We are a great support system and I hope you stick around! We are all suffering in one way or another and it helps to have each other. You will be in my thoughts!
    XOXOOX
    __________________
    ~Secrets

     
    Old 02-17-2009, 07:04 PM   #3
    carrara
    Member
    (female)
     
    carrara's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2009
    Location: canada
    Posts: 50
    carrara HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    I know how you feel. Ithink we all do. You have to make a choice a decision to put a stop to it. You can take control of your life back. I have had panic attacks and I know how scarry they are. I had 3 of them just in Jan. I took percocet for the last 3 years and I used every excuse to take more then I needed for pain. stress,whatever but it didn't help it just makes things worse. I think you are ready to stop or you wouldn't be here. please try you can do it!

     
    Old 02-17-2009, 07:44 PM   #4
    mike s
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    mike s's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2006
    Location: gardnerville,nv. usa
    Posts: 259
    mike s HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Hi Magdolene & welcome. My name is Mike & I've been an alcoholic probably since my late teens. I'm 51 now & still fighting it. In & out of rehab & all the rest. I'm so fortunate I've never hurt anyone or ended up in jail. Please do whatever you can to get a handle on the alcohol issue. I wish I had stopped when I was 34 . You'll save yourself so much heartache. Believe me it can take over every part of your life if you progress in the desease. I've lost most of the use of my rt. arm due to nerve damage caused by my drinking & I'm rt handed. The bottle isn't worth this. You're so young & can have much happiness. The bottle has put me in a state of sorrow that I never could have imagined. I only have 11 days but I'm thankful for that. The good people on this board will help anyway they can. They sure have been there for me. We could work this together Magdolene. There's strength in numbers. Let me know if there's anyway I can help.......Mike

     
    Old 02-18-2009, 05:24 AM   #5
    magdolene
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    magdolene's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Corydon, IN USA
    Posts: 12
    magdolene HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Thanks to all of you for your replies! Support in this matter means the world to me! It has been very difficult to find my way out considering I am pretty reclusive and work with the people I am closest to. If I were to admit my problem to them I would gain their sympathy, but lose respect in the work place.
    I was considering that popular 12 step program, but since I am agnostic it just didn't resonate with me personally. Being able to read the personal ups and downs of those on this board have really caused me to think about different methods of overcoming this....and more importantly, just because you slip doesn't mean you have to fall.
    I also understand what it is like to be addicted to other drugs. I have had my share of them as well. It was only mandatory drug testing at work that caused me to quit. I am a single mother and can't afford to lose my job. I guess with that in mind I shouldn't have a problem getting over this, but it's all about being able to get away with something I suppose.
    Again, my gratitude goes out to all of you. I hope that some day soon I can offer genuine help to others. -M

     
    Old 02-18-2009, 05:45 AM   #6
    ANGELINMICHIGAN
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Aug 2008
    Location: MICHIGAN
    Posts: 237
    ANGELINMICHIGAN HB UserANGELINMICHIGAN HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Magdolene......Welcome to these boards. You will definitely find some help and support here. Everyone is so wonderful and will help you in any way they can. I was on Opiates or Pains Meds. for years due to chronic pain in my neck shoulders and head (also a headache since 2003). I also had failed neck surgery in 2003 and the pills helped with my pain but not 100% maybe only 40% but that was better than nothing. My body went into withdrawl eventually because I needed more oxycontin and vicodin to control the amount of pain I was in and instead had restless legs for 6 months. My doctor treated it with Re-quip which didn't work because it was withdrawl!!!! I didn't want to stay on the pain pills so I checked myself into Re-hab and went through the system and was put on suboxone to get the opiates out of my system. Which was very difficult and another story . I am now about 43 days clean and have my life back (except for my chronic pain which I am working on now to get help but no pain meds so it is very difficult). What I am trying to say to you.....your mind is a strong thing and you need to have a plan so you can get your life back. Your child or children need you to be there for them 100%. What will happen to them if you keep this up??? I am not trying to be harsh, it is just a reality. You don't need the alcohol.....you need to get your life back!!!! (I guess this is a form of TOUGH LOVE..sorry).
    We are all with you here on these boards for support and help and will answer any questions that you might need answering (if we can help).

    I think you need to find "MikeS" posts. He is the one that wrote back to you right away. His posts are inspiring and honest and you will see what he has been through (and is going through now) and you and him could maybe post.

    I definitely think a 12 step program will help and you have to go into it with a mind state of getting clean. Don't hang around with anyone else that drinks and don't have any alcohol in the house. I know you know all of this but I am just trying to make suggestions.

    Take care of yourself and please tell someone that you are close to so they can help you and maybe babysit while you get some help and be there for support.

    Please think about this and think that "you want to get your life back" and soon. You have everything to live for, it is a wonderful world out there!!!!!

    Good Luck

    Hugs

    Lyn in Michigan

     
    Old 02-18-2009, 07:33 AM   #7
    Lugar22
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    Lugar22's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2009
    Location: high wycombe,bucks.U
    Posts: 198
    Lugar22 HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Hiya mate. I see you have had posts from some of the fantastic peeps on the site. Please take to heart what they have to say as they mean it all in the best way. We are all trapped by some form of addiction and are all at different stages of clawing our way back to life. Im back to day one today and like you have kids. Its so hard granted , but we are all in the best place to recieve the support we need. This is a great place to vent all your true feelings and thoughts. As addicts we spend so much time covering things up and lying that it feels good to be honest and realise that people are still there for you. Nobody here will recoil in horror at anything you want to say .... you will just be answered by peeps that reallly want to see you blossom back into the person you should be. You deserve that and so does your family.
    Have you ever thought bout AA? Its something that Im starting to look into as some have said that its awesome.
    Never fear about losing your respect here...you will only gain in strength and support.
    Keep posting...........CC XOXOX

     
    Old 02-19-2009, 06:36 AM   #8
    carrara
    Member
    (female)
     
    carrara's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2009
    Location: canada
    Posts: 50
    carrara HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Magdolene
    How are you doing? I've been thinking about you and your familly. I don't know what it's like to try to quit drinking , but maybe you should just try to drink less, take it one day at a time. Then when you feel ready to stop it won't be as big a shock to your sytem, and you can start to fell good about every drink you don't have now. It will make you feel stonger and better about yourself. I don't understand what you meant about (being able to get away with something) but it doesn't sound like a good thing. I think you are cunfused right now and you need to take steps to be in control of your drinking. You have already taken the first hardest step, you have admitted you have a problem and you want to stop. So....try for yourself and for your kids. Keep talking to us it will help you it has helped us. Take that nexted big step! YOU CAN DO IT!!!
    carrara

    Last edited by carrara; 02-19-2009 at 06:38 AM. Reason: I can't spell!

     
    Old 02-20-2009, 07:13 AM   #9
    magdolene
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    magdolene's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Corydon, IN USA
    Posts: 12
    magdolene HB User
    Talking Re: Taking a deep breath

    carrara-
    Thank you for your suggestion. I havn't considered cutting back for a long time. All of my latest attempts have been of the "cold turkey" variety. I will certainly give it a try!
    Regarding my statement about being able to get away with something.. I meant that drinking is the only thing I was left to use/abuse after they started random drug testing at work. If I use anything else I could lose my job for sure.
    Your'e right, I do need to consider my kids more in this matter. I don't want them to grow up with this habit. I despised watching my mom drink, act crazy and pass out when I was a kid. In spite of that, I still ended up with the same habit. Thank you for your help!

     
    Old 02-20-2009, 07:42 AM   #10
    1Rodfan
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    1Rodfan's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Oct 2007
    Location: columbus ohio usa
    Posts: 39
    1Rodfan HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    magdolene
    My name is Linda and I am going thru the same thing you are. Please know that you are not alone. I struggle with alcohol addiction everyday. I have read it is dangerous to try to detox yourself from this horrible thing I don't know if it's true but I get scared. My daughter is grown (21) but she is still my baby. I also have a 9 month old grandson Gabriel who relies on me also! We all have a story honey but know that I thought of u when I read ur post. I also used to go to work with Vodka in my coffee not a good thing . I can't hold a job today because of my addiction except for cleaning homes with my friend who also drinks. No kind good quality of life. Please know that you are not alone for I have found that I am not. We need to regroup and get help for I come from a family that addiction runs in. I lost my momma and pop to cancer and my sister to an overdose of several things. She was 38 and left behind 3 young children whom I hold close. I found her and am having a hard time dealing. Know that my thoughts and prayers are with you I hope they are with me also. The only one that can change things is you. I have to do that also, do I have the strength? I pray so hard.
    Let me know how you are.
    Linda
    1RODFAN

     
    Old 02-22-2009, 08:01 PM   #11
    magdolene
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    magdolene's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Corydon, IN USA
    Posts: 12
    magdolene HB User
    Re: Taking a deep breath

    Linda-
    Thank you for sharing. I believe we have alot in common. I started drinking wine in the evenings to calm my nerves after I became a mother. I felt like it was a reward to a long day after I got everything done and put my son to bed. After a few years passed and my marriage went bad, I started drinking Vodka until I was drinking (atleast) half a fifth a night. It was hit and miss in the years after that but the past couple of years I have gotten to the point in which I have been drinking whiskey almost every night...usually a half-pint or pint. I do well through the day, but in the evenings..especially during my hour-long drive from work, I resign to the temptation.
    I too come from a family that struggles with addiction. Who knows if it's really in the genes or it is a learned behavior. It's tough either way.
    I have tried to overcome since I joined this board..taking other's advice, but I gave in 3 days last week. Today is day one and I have been trying very hard just to focus on today. If I think about yesterday I become so disappointed with myself that I end up giving in. I am trying to fight all the habits that take me there again. Hopefully I will make it through tomorrow.. If I can just fight the urge to stop at the liquor store on my way home.
    Thank you again Linda. I hope you are well. Maybe if we collaborate we can find a way out.

     
    Closed Thread

    Related Topics
    Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
    Quit smoking...now taking deep breaths? deevine2c Smoking Cessation 3 05-25-2010 03:48 AM
    Trouble taking breaths? Shortness of Breath? rachel4123 Multiple Sclerosis 10 11-30-2009 07:53 PM
    Shoulder Blade pain when taking a deep breath mobilephone Back Problems 1 05-04-2009 05:55 AM
    Having trouble taking a deep breath. Ivellise23 Lung & Respiratory Disorders / COPD 2 01-03-2009 06:22 AM
    Anyone have L.back pain when taking deep breath? lfoster21 Back Problems 4 04-14-2008 06:25 AM
    Pain when taking a deep breath ever since bypass heart surgery jj9500 Heart Disorders 3 05-11-2007 05:54 AM
    Hard taking a deep breath WHY? Rodrick General Health 1 02-20-2007 07:11 PM
    Why can't I take a deep breath? brysonav Anxiety 7 03-03-2006 06:17 AM
    Difficulty with taking deep breath Elle10 Lung & Respiratory Disorders / COPD 0 04-05-2004 08:58 PM
    Trouble achieving a deep breath Seeking Help Lung & Respiratory Disorders / COPD 1 10-17-2003 07:52 PM




    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is On
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:53 PM.





    © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!