It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Addiction & Recovery Message Board

  • A young tramadol user...



  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 06-04-2009, 05:41 AM   #1
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    A young tramadol user...

    You guys are great. Everyone posts the same story over and over and yet you guys are on the forefront to bring comfort. So I decided to throw myself in.

    First - a little backstory. Short as possible.

    When I was 13, we found out I have a cyst on my left testicle. It's a very small cyst, but causes a great deal of pain. I was treated with Naprosyn, but then I quit hurting. Two years later I started hurting again and my lifetime doc put me on Bextra, Celebrex, and a list of cox-2 and NSAIDs. They didn't help. I asked for Ultram by name because my brother had a foot injury and said they helped. He didn't want to give it to me, but gave in and started prescribing it. I was 15 and very opioid-naive, so a simple 25mg dose worked very well. I didn't even have to take it everyday. About once a week. Not only did the Ultram give pain relief, but it also brought on intense euphoria. I loved it. Now I laugh that 25mg used to make me feel so good.

    My use began to increase within the next year. I was taking it every other day...then everyday. I decided not to take it one day and noticed I felt horrible. Like something was under my skin. I had no idea it was withdrawal. I paid it no mind because it wasn't severe. For some reason I decided to go ahead and take the Ultram and those feelings went away. It all went downhill from there.

    Couple years later, my lifetime doc says he doesn't want to prescribe Ultram anymore. So he cuts me off. By then I was up to 100-150mg a day and was in severe withdrawal. I was desperate and found a younger doctor who prescribed me Ultram with no problem.

    Fast forward, now I'm 21 and taking 150-175mg of tramadol every day. This new doc (whom I've been getting Ultram from for 2 years now) gives me 90 tablets with 3 to 5 refills each time. I take 1 tablet three times a day. I go ahead and take 125mg in the morning. Then another 25mg around noon...and sometimes I take a little more later in the evening. So I run out early sometimes and have to face withdrawal for a few days. It is horrible. As you all know.

    I can't blame anything on this new doctor because when I went to get more in April he asked if the Ultram was still working and I said yes, and I don't really get side effects except constipation. And he said we still need to be careful because it can be addicting. So this doctor knows what he's doing. I have refills until October, then I'm due to see him and get more again. However, I'm thinking about telling him I'm dependent and the withdrawal is horrible and asked to be tapered off slowly. I'm so scared, though. I really depend on this drug. It feels like it makes life worth living and problems are easily faced.

    I like it better than the real opioids. Honestly. When I run out early and face withdrawal sometimes, I will get hydrocodone off the street and although they help pain and bring on an even more intense euphoria...they only last 4 hours at a time and it's not the same as tramadol. Tramadol works for many hours and after the rush has passed I'm still left feeling enlightened.

    So I've been on tramadol for almost 6 years now since I was 15. Now I'm 21 and still on it. Living with my girlfriend and we have a baby girl due in August. I took underground mining classes recently and my dad is helping me get on at the mines he works at. I'm excited and nervous about this. And tramadol would make working in the mines so much easier...as it makes everything else so much easier. I don't want to get off of it...and yet I do want to get off of it. I'm tired of fearing withdrawal and feeling it every morning until I take my dose.

    Last edited by howcouldiknow; 06-04-2009 at 05:48 AM.

     
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 06-04-2009, 07:57 AM   #2
    reachout
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Dec 2006
    Posts: 3,409
    reachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Hello Young Friend

    I am happy you have found this board and glad to meet you. Like so many of us, the drug use started with legitimate reasons and somewhere we crossed a line into using it for the wrong reasons. That Ultram has caught so many people! It was touted as non-addictive when first marketed and doctors were prescribing it freely. It was not until many patients began relating to their doctors how addicted they had become that it was finally recognized for what it really is... an addictive drug. I guess this is all water under the bridge, but it does keep me abgry at greedy drug companies who had to have known this through their own trials of the drug.

    I don't want to get off of it...and yet I do want to get off of it.

    I am going to say this gently.... there is no sitting on the fence with this. Ultram is not prescribed to make mining work easier and the thinking in this way must change if you hope to get off this drug and live a restored life again. To continue to abuse it as you are doing is so counter-productive for you. We need to face life on life's terms... the good, the bad and the ugly. When we keep our brains in a drug haze, we may not feel bad stuff as harshly, but we also will not feel good stuff with all the joy that can be had. I used opiates and benzos for many years to curb a lot of pain associated with multiple surgeries for cancer. I got so damn hooked and needed more and more to achieve the same results as time went by. Oh, I 'functioned." I made it to work everyday and that was about it. I would come home and collapse in bed for the rest of the day. I stopped connecting with family and in the end had a total breakdown. If I realized what was happening to me, I stuffed it away so I didn't have to deal with it. Now that I am clean of all opiates and benzos, I can fully appreciate how much better my life is off of them. I FEEL. I feel love and joy and happiness which comes ion balance with the sadnesses and hurts and pain. I am in no more pain off the drugs than I was on them. And most importantly, I have learned to deal with life and enjoy it.

    I think a plan asking your doctor to help you taper off the Ultram is such a wise one. I was a sobbing mess when I went to my long time doctor for help. We developed a plan for me. When I left his office that day, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of me. I had HOPE. Hope that I could get through this and find 'me' again and a life that was peaceful again. And I have. June is two years from the end of all my tapering and living without drugs being a routine part of my life. No more pill counting, feeling scared , fearing life. It is all waiting for you also.

    Make the call now and set up an appointment with your doctor. Ask for help. We don't have to travel this path alone at all. Get your life in good order for you, your mate, and the child to be. So many wonderful things are on your horizon. Don't fail to be there to enjoy them because of drug abuse. We are all here for you.

    Hugs
    reach

     
    Old 06-04-2009, 08:23 AM   #3
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Thank you for the quick reply, reachout.
    What opioids were you using? Just curious.

    Yeah. I feel tapering would be the best route. I've read posts that go both ways. Some say tapering is best. Some say it's not. I'm going to go with tapering. I've had to face cold-turkey before and it was just too agonizing. In May 2008 I had to go 7 days without tramadol. By day 3 I was getting some strange symptoms. My thoughts were scattered and I just felt like I was losing my mind. I was hearing things and sleeping was impossible. You know, by day 7 I was beginning to feel a little better, but of course I got my pills refilled and started over. Back then I was smoking marijuana, too and it's the only thing that got me through those 7 days without going crazy. I tried to come across hydrocodone, codeine, anything like that, but had no luck. Don't worry...I haven't smoked marijuana since January 20th. I wish getting off tramadol was as easy as getting off marijuana. There was no physical withdrawal with quitting marijuana cold-turkey at all. It just doesn't cause dependency. They don't know why. It just doesn't.

    You know what? I may take your advice and call the doctor before my follow up for more meds in October. Like I said...I'm just scared. I'm not scared to ask for help and taper. I'm scared of letting the tramadol go. I know it sounds weird especially to someone who doesn't understand dependency, but I'm sure you understand.

    Looks like I'm going to run out of tramadol a day or two early this month. I may be able to make it if I take a lower dose a few days...but of course...you know how that goes. I'll want more before the day is up. I do have some Ativan (lorazepam) from an old prescription left over from waaaay back. It will probably help take the edge off the withdrawal, but I'll still be in agony. I can't stand the way benzos make me feel. I don't like feeling tired all day. It's like alcohol. I don't drink, because it just makes me tired. Don't like drugs that make me exceedingly drowsy. At least you know I'll never abuse benzos or drugs of that type.

    I was w/d pretty bad when I posted earlier. Of course I took 125mg not long after and I feel pretty decent now. Just like a normal human being. I can't wait to feel normal without tramadol.

     
    Old 06-04-2009, 10:37 AM   #4
    mindy1974
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    mindy1974's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Oct 2005
    Location: colorado
    Posts: 253
    mindy1974 HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    i have been off ultram for over a week now and i am staring to feel human gain. i really took it slow. i lied allot and told people i had the flu but in the end it got better. I GOT REALLY SICK during my tapering but i read everyday about peoples ultram withdrawal and it gave me the hope i needed and the strength to flush those last 45 pills down the toilet. i did use a small amount of a mussel relax-or for the first 4 nights but i was very careful with that. dont do it alone but trust me your pain and mental state will be totaly back to normal in no time after your tapering is complete. thousands of us did it and yu can to!!!

     
    Old 06-04-2009, 07:15 PM   #5
    reachout
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Dec 2006
    Posts: 3,409
    reachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Hi

    "
    Thank you for the quick reply, reachout.
    What opioids were you using? Just curious.
    "

    I started out on Vicodin about 12 years ago after radiation treatment left my skin burned pretty badly. The radiation also burned out my ovary (only had one) and sent me into menopause overnight. The immediate hormonal imbalance caused emotional screw-ups and the doctors put me on Xanax to help. I was really so ignorant about drugs and just took whatever was prescribed. After the radiation, I had a couple of huge surgeries and was put on Percocet for pain. I was on that for years, but the doses kept being increased as haapens on opaites to get the same results. I also used Duragesic patches ( had no idea then how powerful those are!). For a period of time I was on Morphine but really hated how I felt. So back to percocet. When I got up to 12-14 Percocet a day, there was concern about my liver so I was switched to straight Oxycodone. The Xanax had been a constant throughout all the years. WHen I finally understood what bad shape I was in and that I had crossed a line and was abusing the drugs, I began the tapers from Oxycodone first and then Xanax. I look back now and shake my head in disbelief at what I was using and the dosages.

    I really understand the fear of not being on our drug anymore. I remember that it was hard to envision what my life would be like without them. That scared feeling passes as we get consumed in getting off. As I neared the end of the taper, I was actually truly looking forward to taking the last pill. It was hard beciause I got antsy for that day to come and it took a lot of discipline not to jump the gun. In the end, I just walked off the Oxycodone. The end of the Xanax taper was trickier... there was a period of days on, day off, days on, day off, etc. Then a day came when I just knew it was really over and that no more days on were needed. It was anti-climatic.... like the day after Christmas when all the packages have been opened, you know?

    I guess telling you there is nothing to fear about not using is like trying to convince a scared kid that they will not drown in their swimming lessons. That kid is gonna be scared no matter how much assurance you give them. It isn't until they get out of the water still alive that they understand. Until that point, they have to take a leap of faith in the person reassuring them. Gues I am asking you to take a leap of faith here and believe that I tell you true that the fear will prove groundless.

    Hope you have a good night.
    With all hope
    reach

     
    Old 06-05-2009, 06:10 AM   #6
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by reachout View Post

    It was anti-climatic.... like the day after Christmas when all the packages have been opened, you know?
    ^ I love that.

    <removed>

    Last edited by mod-anon; 06-05-2009 at 07:39 AM.

     
    Old 06-07-2009, 05:49 AM   #7
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Well, before I set up an appt to discuss tapering, I'm going to try this cold-turkey one last time. I'm going to try my hardest. I'm really ready to free. I started at a very young age (15 yrs old), and I am still young (21 yrs old), but it's still going to be hard to let go.

    Wish me luck on cold-turkey. I'm going to attempt tomorrow.

     
    Old 06-07-2009, 06:55 AM   #8
    reachout
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Dec 2006
    Posts: 3,409
    reachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Hi

    If you are going to try and go cold turkey, make sure you read the second post on this board titled, "Sample Home detox." It contains a lot of helpful suggestions for withdrawal. I wish you well for the hard task at hand. Stay close to the board throughout the withdrawal.

    Best wishes
    reach

     
    Old 06-07-2009, 08:08 PM   #9
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Oh, i will.
    I'm still feeling normal from my dose earlier today. The withdrawal will probably start somewhere around 3 or 4 a.m. and I'm sure I'll wake up at 7 a.m. because of the w/d. I'm wanting to try cold-turkey because this is my best chance since I don't start working in the mines till the first week of July. No work to worry about at the moment. I'm scared. And the only reason why I have faced withdrawal in the past is because I had no choice (e.g. ran out of pills early). If I get too uncomfortable or start getting severe symptoms I'll just take my dose and set up an appt ASAP to discuss tapering.

    Trust me...those pills will be within reach, but I'm going to do everything in my power to resist taking them. I have a baby girl on the way and I don't want her to have a pill addicted father. It's not just that - I want to feel clean and free and feel joy that isn't synthetic again. I may fail, but tapering is always an option. I will keep you posted, definantly.

    Thanks for the support. I mean it from the bottom of my heart.

     
    Old 06-08-2009, 08:15 PM   #10
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Day 1

    It's 10:05 p.m. and today was brutal. Getting weird symptoms; sneezing, watery eyes, increased breathing rate, muscle aches, cramps, diarrhea, feel restless and tired at the same time, but can't sleep. The worse of all if just a general feeling of severe discomfort all over my body. Like restless legs syndrome all over. Like electricity. I also feel extremely depressed.

    My girlfriend has a slight bug and I had to go to the store by myself today. I was feeling so bad and restless that I left my change and had to turn around and get it.

    About to take some Unisom (doxylamine) and hope to fall asleep. I don't know if I can do this. I may cave in tomorrow morning and take my usual dose. Tapering may be better. This is just too brutal. I may stick it out and look at that recipe and see if anything helps. Otherwise...this withdrawal is just too severe.

     
    Old 06-09-2009, 11:00 AM   #11
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    reachout, I caved in. :-(
    This morning, on day 2, I took 125mg.
    I should have stuck with it, because I'm going to run out a couple of days early before the refill will be allowed anyway. Unless I take only 75mg from here on out. Which is hard in itself. Makes me wonder if I'll be able to taper.

    The relief that was brought on when the tramadol kicked in was unreal. All the withdrawal pain slowly went away. Was like a breath of freshness.

    I failed cold-turkey. Guess I can try again.
    Probably fixing to call the doc and set up appt for tapering.
    I tried.

    Last edited by howcouldiknow; 06-09-2009 at 11:01 AM.

     
    Old 06-09-2009, 12:47 PM   #12
    Secrets1983
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Secrets1983's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jul 2008
    Location: USA
    Posts: 1,298
    Secrets1983 HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Hey there!

    There is NOTHING wrong with tapering. That is what I had to do to make my plan successful.

    You have made the right decision to quit! I know it's not easy!!! Keep going! You can do it!

    You will be kept in my prayers!!!
    __________________
    ~Secrets

     
    Old 06-12-2009, 09:39 AM   #13
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    I called the doctor to set up an appt to discuss tapering off of tramadol. Just my luck...he's out of town for a little while. He won't be back here until later this month and all of his patients are seeing another doctor in the same building until he gets back. I don't feel comfortable discussing dependency and tapering with another doctor. So I'm just going to wait until he gets back. My refill is due next Thursday, but pharmacy always allows you to get refills alittle early. So I'll probably get it Wednesday. That is day 28 of 30...they usually don't have a problem filling in that vicinity.

    I'm about out of pills, but this is perfect because I have enough to take 2 a day, starting today through Tuesday. Now I'm used to taking 3 (what I'm prescribed) and sometimes 3 1/2.

    100mg will help quite a bit with keeping withdrawal at bay, but it's going to be so hard to not take a little more hours after I dose. Keep me in your thoughts. I'm going to just try to stick the withdrawal out until later in the day so the 100mg will work well in the evening. I made it until 11:10 a.m. today. I usually take 125mg as early as 7:00 a.m. and more at 1:00 p.m.

    Keep me in your thoughts, please.
    It will be pretty hard not to take a little more each day.

     
    Old 06-12-2009, 10:41 AM   #14
    reachout
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Dec 2006
    Posts: 3,409
    reachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB User
    Unhappy Re: A young tramadol user...

    Hi Buddy

    Of course you will be in our thoughts. Never doubt that.

    I think that perhaps enthusiasm led the way for you. Enthusiasm is a good thing to help us along the way, but jumping from a constant high dosage to nada sends us into a complete tailspin. Don't worry about taking the drug... it is a live and learn process. All the symptoms you descibed are exactly normal in full withdrawal. It may take a few days to level out again. Stick to the 2 pills a day as you level off.. and you will level off. Be consistent and steady. When I first started, my drop was way too big and I also went into full withdrawals. I know it is horrible. However, I did stick to the drop and my body did level off in a few days. Then I was able to continue making cuts that were smaller and endured the taper.

    The depression that comes can be a torment. Fight it! Force yourself to move as much as possible. This will help the leveling off. Promise on this one. Sometimes I would even force myself to dance to music (though I had lost my sense of rhythm). I would feel a temporary reprieve from the depression and from anxiety. I walked even when I had to drag my feet. Force a smile on your face... this somehow triggers the brain to start producing fell good chemicals. Don't understand it, but I know it works.

    I also set up many safety nets for myself. One of the most practical is turning over the meds to someone. I was given a day's supply at a time. That was the extent of truly trusting myself not to take more than was scheduled.

    Friend, stay with us... we will be here for you the entire way. You are going to be okay. No matter how horrible it is at this minute, know that you will be okay.

    Hugs
    reach

     
    Old 06-12-2009, 12:31 PM   #15
    howcouldiknow
    Junior Member
    (male)
     
    howcouldiknow's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Posts: 45
    howcouldiknow HB User
    Re: A young tramadol user...

    Thanks for the continuing support.

    The 100mg I took at 11:10 this morning is still working pretty well. The euphoria isn't as strong, but no withdrawal at all. I guess I will take some Benadryl (diphenhydramine) if I have trouble sleeping tonight.

    Taking 2 a day until next Wednesday may not be as hard as I thought. I'm sure it will still pose a challenge. Which is why I'm waiting until later in the day to take them. The withdrawal in the morning until I do is scary and although I've been through full-blown withdrawal for days at a time before...I still can't overcome the fear of it.

    I used to think tramadol was so cool. Like I said, I discovered it when I was 15 and had no idea what I was getting myself into. Back then I used it on occasion...usually only on Fridays. A year later use is climbing and dependent.

    What amazes me is tolerance doesn't seem to be a big thing with tramadol for me. 150mg has been stabalizing me and providing euphoria for a couple of years now. There is obviously tolerance, because a tiny dose of 25mg used to do the same 6 years ago. I find taking more than 175mg in a day is uncomfortable. At least I'm not up to 900-1000mg like most users tend to get to.

    Again...thanks for the support and I'll keep you updated on my process,

     
    Closed Thread

    Related Topics
    Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
    tramadol withdrawal twi Addiction & Recovery 2 08-31-2009 05:30 AM
    How to taper off of tramadol toddl2115 Addiction & Recovery 8 09-24-2008 08:17 PM
    Heavy Tramadol User Kicking Habbit droop75 Addiction & Recovery 12 06-30-2008 03:27 PM
    Help I am confused about Tramadol ultram redhead123 Addiction & Recovery 28 06-02-2007 02:27 PM




    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is On
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:20 AM.





    © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!