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  • My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

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    Old 05-22-2011, 12:25 PM   #1
    dudders
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    My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    Ive been a jerk lately and shes been going to college. i started hanging out with my friends more this past week and left her alone casue i was mad at her. she started staying on campus longer and even went to a party on friday. we barely called or talked.

    i told her i needed to talk to her on fsaturday to discuss our relationship. i began talkign about how she didnt call me and saying i wanted to break up with her and i can see her trying to defend herself and not let go of the relationshp.

    but then when i asked her what we should do she started crying and said she wasnt sure. on one hand she doesnt wanna lose me but on the other she saw what it was like to be alone and said she could do that. but that she really didnt want to lose me because she loved me.

    the thing is she offered to even just go back to dating or be friends but i told her no i couldnt do that. either shes my girl or shes not my girl. i didnt beg for her but i told her to make a choice. i told her she can leave me if she wants it will hurt me but i will be strong and try to move on but i said i wanted to be with her and will be a better boyfriend if she wants to continue the relationship. she went back and forth but ultimately decided to choose me and to work the relationship out.

    seriously she saw a future in me these people in college arent going to love her like i do or be there for her in the future. i realized i havnt been treating her right and i promise to do that and appreciate her now moviing forward..

    but part of me is hurt and sad that she was clsoe to dumping me because of school or wanting to party. i feel like i should have let her try it out because i feel that she really loves me a lot and would come back. prior to this, she was always the one fighting for our relationship but now that the tables have turned i see what its like and i will treat her right and do anything to make this relationship work.

    but how am i supposed to feel knowing if she parties or is alone and indepandent thinking she likes it more than me or thinking in the back of her mind she doesnt want to be with me, its making me feel insecure and despressed. i dont know what to think i need opinions please. all i know is she needs to realize the grass isnt always greener. she later told me she could never leave me but i dont know.. im feeling insecure right now. What do you think about the status of our relationship?

    Last edited by dudders; 05-22-2011 at 01:28 PM.

     
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    Old 05-22-2011, 06:56 PM   #2
    micromini
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    Re: My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    How long have you been together?
    Does she live in a dorm?
    What about you? Are you in school? How far away (driving) are you two?

     
    Old 05-22-2011, 07:22 PM   #3
    Seraph
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    Re: My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by dudders View Post
    but how am i supposed to feel knowing if she parties or is alone and indepandent thinking she likes it more than me or thinking in the back of her mind she doesnt want to be with me, its making me feel insecure and despressed. i dont know what to think i need opinions please. all i know is she needs to realize the grass isnt always greener. she later told me she could never leave me but i dont know.. im feeling insecure right now. What do you think about the status of our relationship?
    I think you have had a serious scare, and a wake-up call. This is bound to be unsettling and that is not a bad thing. Clearly you value her even more than you knew and realise how close you came to losing her. Hopefully this will ease off, although I hope the wake up lasts. Remember all this fear is in YOUR head, she is the same person. You are the one who can control what you think. Sera

     
    Old 05-23-2011, 10:23 AM   #4
    Mary83
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    Re: My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    You said you were talking to her and saying you wanted to break up, so what... you just wanted her to fight for you and you were surprised/upset when she didn't? I really think this will be good for your relationship because now you realize that you don't control everything and have all the power. It takes 2 to make a relationship work, and you trying to have all the control and her constantly trying to "make things work" isn't a good dynamic. If she chose to stay with you, it's because she wanted to. Treat her right and hopefully she'll continue to want to. If you don't treat her well though, why would she have any reason to want to stay with you?

     
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    Old 05-23-2011, 11:41 AM   #5
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    Re: My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    I agree with mary .....alot of people like to play the cat and mouse game kind of thing , alot of people like to be chased and it makes them feel in control and wanted.

    Now you have just got to take a chance at both of you making it work. If she is going to leave then she will , theres no stopping her. Show her why its worth staying. Make the relationship fun rather than having talks about concerns , or stressing about her leaving.

     
    Old 05-23-2011, 01:24 PM   #6
    dudders
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    Re: My girlfriend almost broke up with me, but i got her back.

    i told her about my stresses and she said she really wasnt that close to leaving me and that she knew that we'd still be together. do you think shes just saying this or she really meant it.

    shes even been sleeping over and said the other day "are you sad that your going to be sleeping with me the rest of your life"

    she means this stuff right?

    Last edited by dudders; 05-24-2011 at 10:30 AM.

     
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