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Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) Message Board

Scared-Am i NUTS?

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Old 12-22-2004, 08:24 PM   #1
Join Date: Sep 2004
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Scared222 HB User
Question Scared-Am i NUTS?

I am pregnant, Im due in may with a baby BOY!!!

I am so excited and so scared at the same time. This is my first ever pregnancy.

Not only am I paranoid something could go wrong in my pregnancy, Im scared of SIDS when the baby is born.

I really can not stop stressing over something going wrong.
What causes it? I want to do everything right, and im so scared im already talking about being scared to sleep at night when the baby is here.

I want to send me deepest condolences to all of you woman who have lost their baby to SIDS. My heart goes out to all of you!!! I read a few post's on here and they all made me cry and my heart just went to my kneees!


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Old 12-23-2004, 06:25 PM   #2
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BioAdoptMom3 HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

Congratulations on your pregnancy and welcome to the the normal fears of parenthood, which will be with you through your child's adult years, LOL! Seriously, as a mom of three, two of whom are already teenagers, you do worry about everything. When its no longer SIDS, its falling down while walking and bumping the head, then that your child might not have any friends at school, then he is driving and you have a whole new set of fears, heehee!

In all honesty, SIDS is extremely rare and that statement comes directly from the AAP. As a matter of fact, the rate of SIDS in a tummy sleeping newborn is not even close to 1%! Your child actually has a greater chance of being injured in an auto accident before the age of five than he does of dying of SIDS. With those statistics I would say please try not to worry too much and enjoy your baby. They grow so fast!

Also, if you find that worry over it is keeping you awake, consider purchasing an angel care monitor. At least you will have peace of mind while the baby sleeps.


Old 12-27-2004, 05:09 PM   #3
Join Date: Mar 2004
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ladivapr HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

I am not a mother yet but I can believe of these fears. Loosing a child is the worst thing that can happen to anyone but I know God grants peace to survive in case it happens. My brother died last year at 33 so my mom went through it. Deviastating but she has survived. She will never get over his death that's true it but she still has a passion for life and overall by now I think she is okay. There was old lady who is dying now of old age who told me once "when we die we begin to live". From that moment I began to not fear death anymore.

God bless your child!

Old 01-02-2005, 07:23 PM   #4
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brwneyez9 HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

I went throught the samething when i was pregnant. Now my little girl is here and it gets a little easier with the worry but never goes away. You are not nuts. Normal worries for a mother to be.

Old 01-02-2005, 07:39 PM   #5
Join Date: Sep 2004
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Soulcatcher HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

At a four month mark I was so thrilled. I was up tons of nights putting my hand on his chest...then my twins came and I had to check two! Narotic to say the least. Biomom is right saying that you will worry forever. I sometimes wish I could put them back in so I don't have to worry anymore and I can keep them safe. hehehe.Congrats and enjoy him while he's little, it goes by so fast.

Old 01-03-2005, 11:12 AM   #6
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siren1024 HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

I slept with my son right beside me in the bassinet with my hand on his chest for the first 4 months of his life. I awoke at every little grunt, gasp, or snort! But try to remember SIDS is very rare!
Married 09/28/2002
DS born 07/05/2003
DD born 3/24/2005

Last edited by siren1024; 01-03-2005 at 11:12 AM.

Old 01-06-2005, 10:21 AM   #7
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Mary0114 HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

There are a couple of things you can do to lessen the risk. First, make sure your baby sleeps on his back. You can buy positioners at Babys R Us that will keep baby from turning over on to his stomach. I did this with my daughter. However, once they can turn over on their own, there isn't much you can do except turn them back over if you catch them.

Secondly, never use a blanket on a baby under 1 year of age. Even at 1 year, I only used a very light, small coverup for my baby that she couldn't get tangled in. The pediatrician told me, if you are warm, the baby is probably warm too. I just kept the house at about 65 degrees in winter and kep the baby in a nice zip up sleeper with an undershirt. It was enough for her. To this day, she doesn't like blanets.

Thirdly, I recommend that you breastfeed. There is a lower incidence of SIDS in babies who are breastfed for the first 6 months. I recommend you call a lactation consultant and speak to them about the details of this. Call a breastfeeding support group (look up on internet) and get the information.

Lastly, nothing is a guarantee, but there are some things we have no control over. All you can do is your best. Good luck to you.

Old 01-10-2005, 12:26 PM   #8
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Mathewmylove HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

I have to say that I am in that boat as well, I went through nights of checking, and moments of just crying, and I still am worried,and my son is going to be 10 months. I guess I get angry, because its one thing that we can take all precautions to avoid, but have no control over, that bothers me.. I want to keep my little man safe and sound all the time. So know that you are not alone at all.

Congrats.. Christy

Old 01-15-2005, 06:23 PM   #9
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nutmeg123 HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

I can relate to your birth children are now 22, 20 and 18 (also have 3 adopted who are younger)
When my daughter was about 4 mos old she was in her swing and I looked at her to see her breathing..I didn't see movement so I stopped the movement and I slapped her face!!!!! not that I intended to hurt her, just panicked! And she cried so she was fine! The next child, my son, I woke up in the middle of the night and put my hand on his back-his bassinet was next to my bed--and felt no movement. So I pressed on him a bit and still I panicked, screamed and my husband jumped over the bed and shook his shoulders ( never shake a baby, even when you are in a panic). Still nothing..He grabbed him and picked him up and my son took a deep breath, after hanging limply, and was fine. To this day I will never know if we had a "near miss" with him but I knew I could only pray over my kids everytime they went to bed, there was nothing else I could do to prevent anything from happening. And they are grown now..My point? the third child came and I realized how much I had wasted by fearing for my first 2 childrens wellbeing..I had to let go and let God..I had to trust that I would do everything I could to keep my babies safe and the rest was beyond my control. I enjoyed my 3rd child so much more b/c I finally had let go of the fear. Fearing something you have no control over can be paralyzing..Enjoy your baby!

Old 01-20-2005, 07:07 AM   #10
Join Date: Jan 2005
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jaymz HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

you will always worry, trust me. my daughter died of sids at 5 months old, i have 2 sons also and i still worry about my youngest always chekin on him at nite to see if he is breathing and he is 6 yrs old, if your real scared request a moniter for your baby this will sound and alarm if the babies heart or breathing change gl and try not to worry!

Old 01-21-2005, 10:38 PM   #11
Join Date: Jan 2005
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barbara413483 HB User
Wink Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

Hi I'm a grandmother and a mother of a sids baby that died. Not long ago my grandchild of 3 months died. It was not even night it was three in the after noon he was taking a nap after playing for a long time.Less then 7 minutes he was gone.There is no way to know if it will happen or not it has nothing to do with other family or genes.The best thing you can do is love your baby and keep it safe.But there is no way to prevent sids so don't worry your self.God is the finial answer . My daughter now has a new baby that just turned one year old in dec.He is a handsome little man we all worried.But we went on like he was the first born and changed nothing from the way we did things with the one that died. Really dear enjoy your baby and don't worry about things you can not controll.It is rare that this happens .Good luck with your new baby May God BLess you and Your child.

Old 02-16-2005, 12:36 AM   #12
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layla= HB User
Re: Scared-Am i NUTS?

Firstly I would like to send my deepest love to all of you here. I had 3 miscarriages before i went full term to have my now healthy and nearly teenage 5 year old. I have since had another 3. The fear we have for our children will never go, the older they get the more you fear, but that is the natural fear that us mums use to protect her children, good luck and welcome to the mad place called parenthood

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