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  • This is my heart, Please don't break it...

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    Old 09-27-2003, 10:45 AM   #1
    Linz2244
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    Unhappy This is my heart, Please don't break it...

    I want him. I want to be with him. I want to feel him in me, I want to listen to his heart beating, I want him to kiss him, I want his arms around my body. I want his hands all over my body. I want to feel his embrace. I want the whole world to some how drift away accept for us. I want to hear him breathing beside me, I want him sleeping next to me. I want to laugh and talk to him, I want to tell him my deepest secrets and fears. I want him and I to become us. I want to understand him and I want him to understand me. I want to feel…alive. This whole situation is just… painfully…wonderful. The painful part is I just know that when he leaves he is going to go be with his girlfriend. And that kills me inside more than anyone could ever imagine. But the wonderful part is… dreaming about us. Closing my eyes whenever I want to be with him. In my head, he is here. He is mine. We are together. When he is gone and I want or even need him here, all I have to do is close my eyes and let my imagination take over. But when I open my eyes, I am alone again… he is still gone and I am just left wondering all sorts of things. Is he making love with her or is he holding her? Is he laughing and having the best time? That’s all I do is wonder about him. I am sure that the thought of him and I ever being together has NEVER crossed his mind and that just simply hurts beyond the telling of it. I have never wanted anyone like I want him. My desires are so…strong. I see and hear him everyday, I watch him, we are so close and yet so fu*king far apart. Could this love ever be or am I just day dreaming up a fantasy world? What the fu*k can I do? The way I feel about him just won’t go away. I don’t know what to do to make this longing for him go away. Do I just avoid the outside world or do I go on with my everyday life and suffer with this pain and agony? Tell me, someone please tell me what to do to make this all better because I don’t have a mother fu*king clue anymore. Whenever I see him, all I want to do is scream at him and tell him to just look… look into my eyes and tell me we couldn’t be happy together. Look at me and tell me that there isn’t something great that could happen if he would just let it. I just want to pour out my soul to him and whisper in his ear that all he has to do is open his eyes and see. Can you see it? Something amazing, breath-taking and wonderful is in the air. Something about the air in the fall that makes everything seem so… possible. Is this love possible? Could we actually experience something amazing? Or am I simply just being a naive 16 year old? Oh, that’s right, I am merely just 16, which means everything I say should be taken with a grain of salt, huh?!! Well, sorry, I know what I know and I know what the fu*k it is that I feel and I know what great things could happen if I was just given the opportunity. Well, pretty soon, if the door does not open on this for me, I am going to break it down with my bare hands!
    That is all my hectic and confused mind can handle right now.
    Peace and love.
    Hugs and kisses.

    I am not sure why I posted this, I guess I just needed a place to vent and people to hear me. Sorry if this is useless to everyone. I am so lost right now. Thank you to all that took the time to read this.
    God Bless

     
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    Old 09-27-2003, 01:27 PM   #2
    lovely.lady
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    I know how it feels! Don't worry, things will go your way eventually, even if its not the way you orginally wanted it to go. Hang in there- you still have a LOT of life left.


    [This message has been edited by lovely.lady (edited 09-27-2003).]

     
    Old 09-27-2003, 04:47 PM   #3
    **Nessi**
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    i know exactly how you feel, you want something so bad yet you feel you can never have and he'll never feel the way you feel. if you don't tell him it's as if you'll be isolated from the world, everytime you're alone it's as if your with him, and when you see him your hit with the cold pain of knowing you'll never have him. i know how you feel

     
    Old 09-28-2003, 04:51 PM   #4
    CamoLov3
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    wow i have been trying to find the words to explain my feelings but u put it into words.. thanks alot.. just reading that made some of my anger go away..

    but im sure as lovely said.. things will go your way.. maybe now or soon to come.. or even years away but you will find that love

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    Old 09-29-2003, 07:36 PM   #5
    TeTr01
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    Quote:
    Originally posted by Linz2244:
    Can you see it? Something amazing, breath-taking and wonderful is in the air. Something about the air in the fall that makes everything seem so… possible. Is this love possible? Could we actually experience something amazing? Or am I simply just being a naive 16 year old? Oh, that’s right, I am merely just 16, which means everything I say should be taken with a grain of salt, huh?!! Well, sorry, I know what I know and I know what the fu*k it is that I feel ...

    I know exactly how that feels!

    [This message has been edited by TeTr01 (edited 10-06-2003).]

     
    Old 09-30-2003, 06:22 PM   #6
    dude128
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    hey
    yeah im with my girl, we are only 15. thanks for that post TeTr01 cos like im nearly 16 and so's she and i KNOW like i really know that she's the one. and people always go on about "puppy love" and all that crap cos we are young but i knew that age didn't matter because whenever i talk to her or am with her i just feel so...happy heh like i forget how old we are i just want her and she feels the same is so mad
    anyway yeah i thought i might tell some people that
    D

     
    Old 10-05-2003, 02:24 AM   #7
    Baby_hands
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    Talking

    ...am i the only one scared?
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