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  • Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

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    Old 10-15-2005, 09:20 PM   #1
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    WorriedTeenager HB User
    Thumbs down Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

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    Last edited by WorriedTeenager; 04-20-2006 at 09:49 PM.

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    Old 10-15-2005, 11:19 PM   #2
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    I mean, I don't see why they would force you to go. I mean it's not like your a little kid. They should understand if you don't want to go, then you don't have to go. There must be a reason why they want you to, maybe they think your depressed or something. I don't kow how the laws work, for instance if a kid is a troubled youth of gets in trouble and needs counseling, or psychiatric help, that's different. They have to go. But in your case I don't think you have to. And if you have to go, no one can force words out of your mouth. Just sit down, and say mom I'm not going, I don't want to talk to anyone, I don't need counseling, I feel fine.

    Old 10-16-2005, 10:34 AM   #3
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Thanks for the response. We'll see how that works out. I have heard of a law that states that the doctor, in this case the therapist, isn't allowed to disclose information to the teenager's parents? If that is so, I will print out the law, hand it to the therapist, and call it a day.

    Old 10-16-2005, 10:42 AM   #4
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Ok, this might seem like Im not respecting your opinion but that is really not my intent. I respect not wanting to go to therapy- i didn't want to either and I would never force someone to go and I know for alot of us it really isn't what we need.

    You could always try going to counseling and just telling the counselor that you are a healthy, happy, well ajusted teenager and you don't think counseling is a worthwhile use of your time or the counsor's time. Afterall, if your parents won't believe you mabey they would belieeve the counselor. The problem with going and not talking ( or just refusing to go) is that they might assume you have something to hide. But, if you go and show the counselor that your fine you may only have to go a few times and then be done with the whole issue. When my parents had me go to counseling it was actually for good reason (bulimia and cutting) but I didn't want to go. So I went to the sessions and acted happy, confident, etc and didn't have to go to many sessions at all. I also managed to talk to her about anything and everything other than the things we were supposed to talk about- therapists will rarely interupt you and they only have so much time in a session. Enduring a few sessions might be the easiest way to avoid going more.

    Old 10-16-2005, 12:13 PM   #5
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Since this is a health board, not a legal board, I'm only going to address the health part. I totally agree with the previous post. If you really want to convince your parents that you are fine and mature enough to know what's best, taking an "I refuse to go" position is not going to do it for you. If anything, it will only show that you aren't mature or fine.

    It's a bit of a catch-22, but the more you fight, the worse you look. And it will definitely look like you are hiding something.

    Old 10-17-2005, 01:32 PM   #6
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?


    I think your parents really love you and want whats best for you. As, a 21 former sucidal inpatient, including lock down, I can tell you I did not benefit from therapy. It clouded my judgement, and in retrospect all it did was dig up old wounds that I wished to forget. To me, they take your cash and listen to you, is how I see it. Anyone willing to listen to me at that time was considered my therapist, lol. Thats allmost people need is to talkto someone, anyone, that will listen and provide tender, loving support.

    Then, there is the other side of the coin. A friend of mine went through some troubled times when she was growing up that greatly impacted her psyche, and she knew she needed to talk with someone. So, she did, and after going through 3 or more therapists found one she truly trusted. The key word here being trust, and that is often a difficult task for one in emotional turmoil.

    If I were in your shoes, humour them and go to a therapist of their choosing. When you have your first session, simply explain to the therapist, the reasons you feel you don't belong there, and then take it from that point on.

    Parents put us through so much, lol, its a wonder I even made it this far in my life, without some major catastrophes. But, you're young yet, and you'll learn in time, that you are fully capable of controlling your destiny, come the time you arrive in the real world, with a job, bills to pay, and just the everyday responsibilities adults entail.

    Often times, parents can be overly critical, or too coddling, making sure the mistakes they made do not happen to their kids. But, what happens often is they hold on much too tight, and suffocate their kids, and thats when they become emotionally stunted. They become adults who are still kids.

    Don't let this happen to you, stand up for yourself, in the right ways. Yes, you still have to follow the rules and boundaries that they have outlined for you, but you are entitled to mistakes, errors, in life and they should let you LEARN from your mistakes, NOT protect you from this, because that is life lessons, which assist you in the growing up process.

    I hope you see good results from this...take care.

    Old 10-18-2005, 05:49 AM   #7
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Steve, this is just a thought from an old grandfather of a 16 year old. Since you feel that you're ok but maybe your parents aren't, why not suggest family therapy and use it to help them? You would have a chance to explain to the therapist how they are dysfunctional and maybe get them the help they need. They'd be healthier, you'd be happier 'cause they'd be off your case. Seems like a win win situation to me. This is assuming, of course, that you love your parents enough to put yourself through some inconvenience to help them...

    I'm not joking here. I personally know of a situation where the parents sent their son to a therapist and the therapist concluded that the parents had the problem, not the kid!


    Last edited by deepsouth; 10-18-2005 at 05:51 AM.

    Old 10-18-2005, 10:33 AM   #8
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    I was reading all the threads and tend to agree somewhat with Robert. I also am a father and grandfather. Sometimes we as adults forget the teen years. We remember only some of it. We dont live in the same (world) as your generation does. That being said, to put the scenereo given by Robert into a diferent perspective...imagine a traffic accident...4 people, one on each corner witness it, that means possibly 6 different views of the same accident. the 2 drivers see from their views, and each person see their view of the accident. All 6 have wittnessed the same incident, however there will be variations in their stories as they each saw different sides to the accident. As in life, your parents are watching you from a different view than what you see yourself as. Your view can be just as correct as theirs. The maturity you possess will allow you the ability to think outside of yourself and let others see a clearer picture of who you are. Your parents are concerned for you as you yourself are. Given this information, take it to the therepist and be who you are. That person if they are truly open will see that you are a normally ajusted young adult. This intern can be shared with your parents who can rest assured that your fine. Remember, were not perfect parents. Being a parent, we have a very difficult problem with it, parenting doesn't come with operating manuels. Our manuel is life's experience. You are living that experience out for your parents to learn from. Make them proud, do your best and you will do great. Even if they don't recognize who you are now, in time you will prove your well adjusted and capable.I believe your parents want the best for you, we dont always know what that is..hang in there ..Wishing you the best...God Bless Bernie...

    Old 10-19-2005, 06:41 PM   #9
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Well, as someone who has benefitted from therapy to combat the emotional/verbal abuse I suffered from my father for twelve years, and my OCD, I can personally say that therapy is very useful to help you get on with your life and prosper. However, the legal age for psychiatric confidentiality (excluding suicidal thinking, plans to murder/hurt someone, and possibly, drug use) is 14, which you've surpassed. At 14, you are able to sign release forms and choose whether or not certain information is allowed to be given to your parents (aside from the serious issues I listed above).
    "Not everything that steps out of line, and thus 'abnormal,' must necessarily be 'inferior.'"
    -Hans Asperger

    Old 11-01-2005, 12:39 PM   #10
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    As long as you are a minor your parents can force you to go to therapy. They have to give consent for most medical things as well. And they can admit you into a psychiatric hospital or rehab against your will. You really do nto have many rights until you are of legal age, 18.

    Old 11-01-2005, 02:13 PM   #11
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    Re: Parents want me to have therapy - Legal rights?

    Well all I can tell you is if you don't want to go ask your parents what makes them think you have a problem, or is the problem really with them. I don't know your parents at all or you so a right judgement on this issue would be some what pointless, some people do a lot of bad things but put on a image that its ok, however people who really have a problem are usally the first to not accept it. If you would like to know where you stand legally, well where you stand is you live under your parents roof, you follow their rules unless you feel your being abused and call a social worker. If you where forced to go to some center for help, you really don't have an option. You can fight with your parents about the issue but really if you want to or not doesn't matter your 15 years old, untell your 18 you cannot do nothing.

    I my self hate would hate going to some srink, so I understand a bit on where your coming from. Whats the point in talking to some doctor when there isn't a problem to talk to. So I would just do this go there, and talk about what you did at school that day, like you did good in floor hockey or something. I'm sure 5 vist's of you talking about you playing video games or something will give the doctor a clear idea theres nothing wrong. However if you really think theres somthing wrong with your parents go to the doctor and instead of talking about yourself state some things about your parents, tell the doctor you feel your parents have a problem and it's not you.

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