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This killed me guys ... Please Help !!

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Old 05-19-2006, 08:42 PM   #1
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Oshawa Ontario Canada
Posts: 66
cryingdestiny HB User
This killed me guys ... Please Help !!

Ok, well first I would like to make it clear that Im a decent looking girl which is why Im so lost as to why a guy would go to such extremes to do this to me!!

Okay ... I liked this guy at my gym for about 9 months. I never talked to him or anything but we looked at eachother a lot. I had a lot of friends at my gym and I talked to a lot of men on a regular basis but just as friends. I love meeting new people.

So anyways, months went by and I wanted to talk to this guy in the worst way. I think I have a phobia with talking to guys or something because I cant do it ... It always seems like such a struggle and it always takes so long for me to actually get up the nerve to do it.

Everytime I thought about talking to him I begin sweating like a madman, getting shaky, I go all red, I start to slur when I talk and I cant concentrate, Its really bad and I lose my appetite and have to go bathroom but I never go because I know its just my nerves. So talking to him seemed next to impossible.

I lost sooo much weight expecting things to come easier for me. I thought he seemed interested because he looked at me a lot and such and he started working out near me more than usual and everytime I looked at him, he looked down then he would look at me again. I thought these were the obvious signs ...

So oneday, I finally got up the nerve to approach him. I asked him how to do deadlifts. Because I really hadnt a clue how to do them anyways. And he was super nice!! He was friendly and he seemed like he was happy I had asked him. I played it cool and so that was that!

The next day I talked to him again. And I brought up the fact that I was interested in getting to know him better. I got his phone number and I told him I'd call him the next day sometime. I never gave him a specific time or anything.

Okay, so just to fill ya in, I over-analyse things wayy too much. Like, for example. When he gave me his phone # I thought maybe it was the wrong one. But it wasnt. He did infact give me the right one. So this is what went down.

I called him the next day and his sister answered and said he was sleeping and she said that she would wake him up for me if I wanted. I didnt want her to wake him so I told her, I'd just try back later and she said he'd be home and that would be a good idea.

So I tried back later and he was STILL sleeping. This time she didnt offer to wake him up but I asked her when he'd be available and she said he might be going out now. Hmm. This made me suspicious and I kinda got the feeling she was sending me on a wild goose chase.

Soooooo, later on that night I called back and there was nooo answer. Then I mustve called backed 30 more times after that. Hope to dear god that didnt show up on his phone and I admit that was a little dumb of me to call him so much but I really wanted to get a hold of him just to find out whats going on, right??

So I left a message asking him to phone me back and let me know, does he wanna get to know me or did I read too much into it.

No phone call.

Still no phone call ...

He must hate me a whole lot not to have the decency to let me know where I stand! Why the hell would he do this to me ? Why didnt he just tell me no, you cannot have my # number or why didnt he give me a fake #. I wouldve gotten the hint at least. Why give a girl your number if you dont wanna talk to her? He seemed so willing too when I asked him for his #.

What do you think the problem was?

Can someone help me?

Because this sent my self esteem right down the tube
xXx[.Everytime.I.See.Your.Picture.I.Cry.And. I.Learn.To.Get.Over.You.One.More.Time.]xXx

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Old 05-20-2006, 07:25 PM   #2
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: California
Posts: 246
mystiq86 HB User
Re: This killed me guys ... Please Help !!

I think that the problem was that you came on too strong. I mean you tried calling him the first three times and no luck, you should have stopped there for a while and try calling him again in like a few days. I think that whether or not he has caller id, he would have deduced that it was you calling him excessively. I could be wrong, but it sounds like to me that you may have scared him off.
Please do not dwell on this. We all do things like this when we are really into someone. Just because he hasn't called you back, doesn't mean that he won't. And if you really want to test my theory, see how he reacts to you when you see each other at the gym again. Does he say hi? Does he work out next to you still? Those kinds of things will determine if he's upset or avoiding you.
Sometimes guys are guys. And for whatever reason they just don't call you back. I gave my number to a guy early in the semester and he told me he'd call me in the next few days, well he never did. Then he started avoiding eye contact for some stupid reason. Personally I don't care. It just makes him look like a jerk. Then there was this one time where it took a guy two and a half months to call me back! We're friends now and talk every so often. Guys are just strange sometimes. A
Anyway, sorry about rambling on. Don't let this guy hurt your self esteem. You sound like a really nice person. And I guarantee that there will be plenty more guys in the future. He is but one of many. Besides if he did blow you off, he's not even worth your time thinking about. Just my opinion.
Sorry if I didn't help much. I wish you the best of luck.

Old 05-21-2006, 12:13 PM   #3
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Oshawa Ontario Canada
Posts: 66
cryingdestiny HB User
Re: This killed me guys ... Please Help !!

Thank You hun for the response And it helped and I agree, I came on too strong and that probably scared him off. But I wont be seeing him anymore anyways because my membership at that gym ran out and to avoid HIM and the humiliation of calling so many times, I got a membership at another gym and Im gonna look for a guy outside the gym to avoid the akwardness of it all because it can be awkward hehe* Im sorry that that happened to you too, it can suck bigtime, and I dont know why guys just cannot be upfront and honest. It wouldve saved a lot of time if he had just said he wasnt interested or he was already involved with someone. Oh well.
Thanks again hun!
xXx[.Everytime.I.See.Your.Picture.I.Cry.And. I.Learn.To.Get.Over.You.One.More.Time.]xXx

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