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Posted by derrick on July 15, 2000 at 08:42:27:

I am having episodes, lasting approx. a week, that include:

(1) A noticeable change in my personality, I do not feel like myself and my partner agrees.

(2) Disorientation, confusion over such things as what day it is, and short-term memory loss.

(3) On 2 of the 8 or so episodes I have blacked out.

The first time I can recall this happening was as a teenager, I have gone 3-5 years at a time without any of the above things happening. In the past few years they seem to be increasing. There appears to be a positive correlation with my fatherís death and the way he died (a horrible battle with cancer), and my episodes of the past few years. My wife's niece had open had surgery and we went to see her in the intensive care unit, it was the first time since my father died that I had been in one. When I returned from the hospital I experienced all 3 of the above. On the anniversary of my fatherís death, and his birth date, seem to cause the first two items. I definitely have had a difficult time dealing with his death, and there were several issues I was unable to resolve with him before his death. My most recent episode revolved around my aunt dying of cancer. In that case it came to light that in my fatherís final hours of life he was not on a respirator, the only machine he was attached to (besides one for waste removal) was a blood platelet machine. I had been convinced, in my mind, that when the doctors asked permission of the family to shut off the machine keeping dad alive it was a respirator. This as one can imagine was the most difficult decision I have ever made. So if anyone can explain this I would truly appreciate it. I am going to see a neurologist in Sep. Thank you.


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