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Re: Personal Problems

Re: Personal Problems

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Posted by your friend on November 21, 2000 at 16:20:24:

In Reply to: IProblem with nurse practicioner and more posted by Tired on November 18, 2000 at 21:48:38:

Hi Tired.
I can understand feeling like judgements are unfair...however, I can also see the nurse's point of view. She sees a decent fellow that is so bitter, his own bitterness is a turn off.

You shoot yourself in the foot, by dwelling on the past. No one OWES you a relationship with them. If you dwell on the past it will replace the present and affect the future.
This is what she is trying to get thru to you.
She cared enough to take the time to interact with you and tell you the truth.

Bitterness is an extremely repusive attitude. We all struggle to feel Ok, and dislike rejection.
The most rejecting attitude there is, is bitterness aginst others. Why would anyone want to choose to subject themselves to your bitterness, or anyone's?

No one "makes" us angry, we just are.
No one wants to be subjected to anger over the past or fears of the future, just because of the fact we cannot help fix it, and sooner or later it will fall upon us, too.

We alone are responsible for our attitude. All of us have similar feelings, but not all of us harbor them and let them become bitterness.
We have a choice.
Bitterness is so unattractive, it will discolor all a person's other positive attributes!
This is just a fact of life.
I am sure you ahve a LOT of poitives to offer, but your attitude does come thru, don't fool yourself that you are hiding it by acting nice. It doesn't hide!

BUT, think what you feel like saying to anyone that dumps their anger your way, say on the road.
Is it attractive to YOU?
People can see underlying anger, believe me.
You will be unattractive to people until you deal with your attitude.

I am not blaming you, as I have to deal with my anger issues too, we all do.
But it is possible to overcome and become a more positive and affirming person, which attitude is HIGHLY attractive!

I believe in you, because I overcame my own negative attitude. You can too.
First, one has to accept responsibility for it, and want to change it...that isn't changing "you", it is changing attitude.

Like you said, tho, you can stay the same or change it, as you choose.

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