Discussions that mention abilify

General Health board

Thanks for your reply :)

I have had blood work done.... A lot of it done! Before now, I had never ever had a needle stuck in me before. Er.. Im not scared of them anymore.. I actually started crying the first time I went in. But it really doesnt hurt that much! :)

The tests say that all my hormones are fine.. Except that progesterone or whatever was a /little/ low.

I took a class last year.. "stress management" lol.. It was a load of balogna. The teacher seemed more stressed than us. The majority of my stress, I think comes from lack of Money... I am worried about not finishing colllege because I dont have any money.. Worried that I cannot find a job anywhere.. worried that my symptoms would get worse in a job type scenario and I'd have to quit.. or be fired because they think my personal hygeine is bad.

Another thing i forgot to list up there is I have sleeping problems.. Most of the time I'm up till 4-5 am... before I can sleep.

However, it is the one problem my doctor DID fix.. She put me on Seroquil.. which puts me out in 45minutes, lol. (even if i just woke up 5 hours before!)

The problem with that is i wake up feeling tired still.. and i'll sleep anywheres from 12-17 hours.

Another thing I neglected to mention (I /WAS/ writing this at 3am...) Was that I did go see a pscyhologist a few years back.. My personality.. is sooo different from most teenagers.. combined with all this.. that I thought I may be crazy!

She was virtually no help at all. When my mom died in 2005 she said "how is your mom doing? I heard she was in the hospital." When she died at home, here. I was a bit upset at that..

But she put me on Seroquil too.. which helpd me sleep back then (10th grade) but also on Abilify... and lamictal.. She thought I may be bipolar...

But ive discovered now that.. My moods swing a lot because a lot of bad things happen!!!

One day ill be happy because the sun is out and im feelin good.... Ill be singing at the top of my lungs and just be happy.. but something like my car will stall in the middle of the road or something.. and ill feel traumatized for the next few days.. and i wont even feel like putting on music.

...er and i guess another thing i neglected to mention was.. I think I do have emotion problems..

Most of the time i feel very stoic... Neither happy nor sad or anything.. Which is why I think i am not depressed.. I feel sad and happy WHEN I DO FEEL THINGS... because of good and bad things that happen.. Not for no reason.

My friend with the swords often feels sad because of no reason.. I agree that that IS depression.. but in my case it is not.

My doctor tried putting me on depression medicine.. and I said no.. because all the medicine in the world cant fix THINGS that happen.. (Like human stupidity)

Also... (geez i keep remembering random things) I am smart.. you know.. knowledge wise.. But as far as numbers and math, I believe i may be /really/ retarded.. I dont know my times tables..... I have to use my fingers to figure out 3 x 4. When it comes to other numbers.. like in the 6-7-8s range.. like 6x7, 7x8.. I dont even bother using my fingers.. because usually i mess up and get a wrong answer..

..Ive even tried playing Brain Age to help.. but it's not. I have a 4.0 in college... .... except in Beginning algebra.. I got a 2.5.. I just cant do math.. I cant do numbers.. I once tried to do Su***u but I simply COULD NOT..

I tell people.. That i dont know my times tables.. and counting numbers is hard... (one of the games in brain age shows a house and you must add how many people go in the house.. and subtract how may exit the house, quickly) I cant even do that!!! I have to stop and think for a while.. I cant do it quickly.. even for addition.. It makes me feel really stupid..

Everything else in school is a complete breeze for me. I was in Quiz Bowl and when it came to a math problem, I didnt even pick up my pencil. I know I couldnt do it at all.. :\

Lutheran - I will take some allergy medicine we have here.. right now and see how i feel the rest of the day.. I never really tried that...

...which leads me also to another problem XD.. I can't swallow pills.. My dad thinks that I just dont WANT to.. but it's that i /cant/ IF i try, i end up choking and puking.. It's almost like my throat isnt big enough.. I can swallow, however, softer things.. like steak.. in big chunks.

...at one time, I had some pills I couldnt crush up and they didnt come in liquid.. so... I put them inside of macaroni and swallowed the macaroni.. I could swallow that cuz its soft.. and doesnt make me gag..

I have insane gag reflexes.. >_<

Also - Lately I have also been having memory problems.. Not like. .i forget to put my pants on or anything XD but little things..

Like.. I forgot to take that allergy medicine... till now.. BUT.. I kept this page open, so i would remember.. and i knew that I would forget.. so thats why I did it..

It used to be i would remember things... and i COULDNT Forget them.. I could tell you, you know.. some obscure thing someone said at supper 4 weeks ago..

I could tell you the same exact sentence you said to me about.. for ex.. the mail 4 days ago. quote it EXACTLY.. now i cant remember simple things... Like taking this medicine.. Or doing laundry... or even TAKING my sleeping medicine...

One night at 11pm i had the strange desire to leave the house and go somewhere.. So i thought i'd take bottles back to walmart... So i got 1/2 way there and.. I left the bottles at home. I had to turn around and get them... I forgot the WHOLE REASON I came... >_<

Other times im in the bathroom doing whatever.. and i'll leave the light on.. Ill come back later only to discover it is still on.. Before I would NEVER do that... as i do have compulsive light-turning-offness.

However, It is not as bad as my friend in florida. She came to visit once... and left the water running in the sink. I would never do that as I could HEAR that its still on...

None of it is life threatening.. My paranoia makes SURE that I dont forget anything that may be life threatening..

but it is stressfull to me.. It too, makes me feel stupid... And it also contributes to why I think that something in my head is wrong.. Im sooo sure of it.. I did get a CAT scan of my head and they said there wasnt anything physically wrong..

I often watch Mystery Diagnosis on Discovery Health and I write down diseases that sound like I might have... Of course, I dont actually have any of them... but..

It seems for now, I am mystery: diagnosis now, lol. Perhaps someday ill end up on there >_>