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Sexual Health - Men board


I've been suffering from performance anxiety for the last five months. I've lost complete confidence over my ability to perform sex. I'm 36 years old and I get major anxiety before having sex, sometimes if I just think about sex I get nervous. I never happened this problem before the start of this five months ago; yes I can get erection during forplay or sometimes just sitting around and think about sex. But intercourse is only successful maybe 1 out of every six attempts. The one time I only last like 2 minutes.

Will this ever go away? Sometimes I feel helpless, and I have no reason to even wake up in the morning. My spouse is hanging in there with me, but can you really expect someone to stick around forever if there not pleased sexually? This is driving me crazy.

Has anyone been in my shoes? If so, how did you get out of this nightmare? It seems like it has to be a maricle to make it disappear. I have not tried viagra or cialis. I'm afraid it won't work, and then where do I go? :confused: How do you get the anxiety to go away. Please help!
Been there. No fun. There are a lot of reasons for the anxiety you feel and it seems to be a vicious cycle. The original reason for the anxiety may long be gone and replaced by the performance anxiety itself. Viagra seems to produce stronger erections than Cialis, but Cialis lasts much longer. It will give you an erection, but you may becoe psychologically dependant upon it. It may do the trick for you since it sounds like all you need it to regain confidence. Spend some time doing oral, just to please her. Don't try intercourse, just get her off orally. This eliminates the performance component of love-making. Just enjoy the pleasure she is receiving. You can also try watching some porn to get additional techniques, though keep in mind that not all women want to get banged like in the porns. But you can look at some oral techniques. Masturbate but not to come, just to feel the sensation. When you're with your spouse, use some of the techniques and positions you've seen. If you begin to lose your erection, go oral or get into another position that is more stimulating to you. Basically, you've got to get the fear out of your mind and that's easier said than done. Viagra will get you hard and can help you get over it, just don't think that you have to have viagra every time.
Quote from Cinemagic:
Been there. No fun. There are a lot of reasons for the anxiety you feel and it seems to be a vicious cycle. The original reason for the anxiety may long be gone and replaced by the performance anxiety itself. Viagra seems to produce stronger erections than Cialis, but Cialis lasts much longer. It will give you an erection, but you may becoe psychologically dependant upon it. It may do the trick for you since it sounds like all you need it to regain confidence. Spend some time doing oral, just to please her. Don't try intercourse, just get her off orally. This eliminates the performance component of love-making. Just enjoy the pleasure she is receiving. You can also try watching some porn to get additional techniques, though keep in mind that not all women want to get banged like in the porns. But you can look at some oral techniques. Masturbate but not to come, just to feel the sensation. When you're with your spouse, use some of the techniques and positions you've seen. If you begin to lose your erection, go oral or get into another position that is more stimulating to you. Basically, you've got to get the fear out of your mind and that's easier said than done. Viagra will get you hard and can help you get over it, just don't think that you have to have viagra every time.

Did you get over it? How long did you go through this? Did you have the anxiety symptoms? There can't be a worst problem for a man to experience. You take for granted the ability to have sex until something like this slaps you in the face. I would give anything just to have my sexual functions returned to normal. Eventually, I'll try viagra or cialis, but I think my anxiety needs to get under control.
Quote from Cinemagic:
Yes I did get over it. However my personal anxiety was related to stress and difficult times with my wife. When she was gone, so were my problems. I in no way suggest that you get rid of your wife. Anxiety can come from a number of stress related factors. Money, work, children. Basically anything that tends to preoccupy your mind. Unfortunately, that simple anxiety that results to poor sexual performance now results in the replacement of the preoccupation of the original source with that of sex. I used Viagra for the boost and fantasy to maintain interest. It worked, but my relationship was still tanked. I finally got rid of the wife and got a girlfriend and everything's fine. But like I said, that was me and my problem. If you are still in love with your wife, then by no means should you look for another. Most of overcoming anxiety is realizing that it's not something physically wrong. Focus on things other than making your penis hard such as how to better pleasure your partner in all ways. You'll find that hardness will come (no pun intended).

I appreciate your response, it nice to see that everyone does not think this is impossible to overcome. My performance anxiety did stem from issues with our marriage and also about my career. I became totally stressed out, and had one bad sexual performance, and it was down hill from that night. Most of the issues have been cleared up, but the performance anxiety remains. I am preoccupied with wondering if my sex life will return to normal. I know I have to change my thought process in order to have any progress, but its just so hard.

I will soon try viagra or cialis, I just hope it works because if not then, I just don't know..thanks