Quote from buzzkiller:Jasmine,
I told them I could not take them I told them right up front I crush them and snort them.
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Oh My God - Dale - THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU - You just broke the ice for me. About 3 times now i have started writing a post confessing that the real reason I run out early every month is because i crush them and snort them. And then I need to 'do' one every two hours - They hit me faster and its a better buzz. But each time i erased what i wrote b/c i was embarrassed to admit what i am doing with them.
Today I actually took 2 - whole - and swallowed them. And they work. I figured if I can stop snorting them and really try to taper off of them at least then maybe I wont have to go through such severe w/d - I called a drug abuse hot line 'for a friend' and the lady told me that detoxing would be like getting hit by a freight train. Great. She also said that she used to break her own fingers to get percs. i dont know why it made me feel better, maybe b/c misery really does love company, but it helps to know that i'm not the only one who does it.
I got my husband hooked on these too. He caught me doing them and thought i was doing coke. When i told him what i did, he said 'set one up for me, if they're so great and you have to do them, then lets see whats so great about them.' I think he was testing me. I said no, that it could kill him, and it's not worth it. So he said, if you're gonna do them, then i'm gonna do them. If you're not, then give them to me and i'll get rid of them. So I set one up for him. That was 4 years ago. Now he's a full blown addict like me. I can't believe I did this to him. He has very very bad knees and a very bad back but before he met me, he dealt with it, took a percocet at night to help him sleep, that was it. Now his life is in ruins. Thanks to me. I have to make this right. Every day we talk about how we have to stop, how we cant live like this anymore, literally our lives revolve around these pills. But then every day we keep doing them. We keep saying that as soon as we get our pain under control......we'll stop. Well his will never be under control, mine will but he thinks he can deal with it like he did before. I dont know. I wish I could afford to do that rapid detox thing - I saw it on Dr Phil and it worked for the people that did it (so far). The did it at Florida Detox - but I think it costs around 10Gs. I'm just sooo afraid to go through w/d. I really am. I used to do worse stuff, really - before I had any back problems at all. I used to take drugs from work. Demerol, Dilaudid, Morphine. I used to inject myself with them. I lost my license for it. Still didn't learn my lesson. What does it take?
So Dale - are you off the oxys now? How did it go? Or are you still weaning off them? Can I ask what dose you were on and how you weaned or are weaning? Thanks! Jas[/FONT]