Discussions that mention demerol

Addiction & Recovery board

To anyone that can help!!!

I am 23 years of age. I am for the first time admitting to be addicted to codeine, and it feels liberating, yet a bit odd to be doing this online while my gf and family do not share in this testimony. You see my addiction started when I was 17, and diagnosed with gullbladder stones. I waited 9 months before being operated on and was given demerol for pain. After the operation was over, two weeks later I'm back in the emergency with the same acute cramps. The doctor is puzzled, so after four specialists, they diagnose me with irritable bowel syndrome. Since then I've tried all of the meds for it, none work, so I landed on codeine 30mg, I was prescribed 6 a day for 3 and a half years, yet they would be gone in two weeks and the rest of those days left in the month were spent in taking tyl#1.

See, for 3 and a half years I was taking 60 tyl#! a day, and even up til last year, I went for a regular blood test and my liver was fine, must be the superb diet I have in order to keep my ibs at bay, and being a weight lifter, I eat lean wholesome foods, but then again, I am a extremely spiritual person, and I also thank God everyday for my life, even if I hate the status of it. There's no other reason for me to be alive right now, yet after that amount of time and pills I am still here...Now here is my present situation...Since a year ago, I decided I could no longer go on feeling like I was dying after taking 20 pills at a time, three times a day, it was indeed to cover some ibs pain, but the rest which I;d say 70 percent was addiction. So I told God I would cut down dramatically, and since last year I've been taking 10-15, but now my body still feels ill.

I take vitamins everyday as well as an excellent diet and lots of water, yet I am worried as I sweat a lot, and I feel like my chest is hurting. I feel for a few seconds during the day as if I have gas or something around my chest on the left side, so it got me freaked big time, and I went to see the doctor a few months ago for a heart test, since I told him I was having chest pains, but he said those types are benign, so ok, I went for the test. The test results came in fine, but I'm still having them and mentally its keeping me freaked out all day which adds more stress which adds to more of those few seconds of gentle pain/gas feeling. I wonder if this is normal, because I want to quit

You see I am a very dedicated person now as I feel I have to live a long and healthy life. I have a gf who I tremendously love, but the core reason for me to live is because I have to experience my true self and transmutate this ego, this shameful shell that isn;t me. I was a smoker for 6 years, I quit, I'm going on my third month. I was also on elavil for apparent pain ease from ibs, but its an anti depressant and it was helping me to sleep, yet without it I couldn't sleep, so I quit that too, been clean from it now going on 8 months or so, its been so long and I sleep so well, I can't care to remember, lol..

Can someone help me or give me advice on how to quit, cause I don't want to go to detox, I am down to 8 now, its been my first day, I know, not that impressive, but I want to taper down and stop within this coming month, I have to, and I am, I guess I just need some reassurance and to know that I'm not dying cause this chest stuff, plus the sweating even when I'm on them still, is making me worried which just adds to the problem, so can someone calm my nerves, thank you :)