Discussions that mention methadone

Addiction & Recovery board

Hi Guys.. To my old friends, and newbies. I've been on this board for almost a year.. At times I don't know what I would've done without it. I've came from taking methadone to suboxone, and tapering down to 1mg then nothing and feeling bad constantly.. then getting back on 2mgs to stabilize myself. So now it's past time for me to drop to 1mg. I've done it some days, but not consistently. I am exercising now, I'm playing volleyball.. and it's very good for my energy level. I know this is the time for me to come off of sub. I'm so ready. What's holding me back?? Fear? I hate that word. That's the only thing I can see. I just don't like to feel bad. But who does? I've told myself before if this was easy, then everyone would be able to do it..... I just have to tough it out and get down to the lowest dose possible and space days. I've researched everything I can and I know the plan. It's just doing it. I turned 29 yesterday, and I realized I should be very thankful for another year.... If not for the suboxone, I could be dead or in jail. I know everyone has mixed feelings on this drug. But for me... it's been a good one. I know that your brain has to have time to heal from the addictive personality.. I had to learn to live all over again. To do things sober. Some things I'm still learning. Where I used to could pop a pill and go on, it's not that way anymore. So I know I'm at the crossroads for real now.... and I have to choose a path. I'm going to choose the right one. I've came to far to turn back now... I guess it helps to just get this all out.. and to know that I have support and people that have been there before. :)

I'll talk to you guys later..