Discussions that mention paxil

Depression board

I apologize to anyone reading this. I just need a place to vent, and this seemed like a good spot. I have been suffering with clinical depression since I was about 13 years old, so that makes it going on 17 years now. I have had some success with medication, Paxil to be exact, but have been off of it for about 8 months now due to a loss of medical benefits.

Because of this I can feel myself sinking back into the familiar clutches of ansgst, depession, anger, and disassociation. I hate this feeling and wish I could make it stop.

I can be fine one minute, and then a song will come on or a thought will come into my head and I will just start crying. It's not over one thing either, but a whole slew of things pop into my head, and all of them fill me with grief and pain. And it can end just as quickly as it began.

It is also driving a serious wedge between me and my wife. No surprises there. I get so latched on to small details and obsess about them that I drive her insane. I take small things as huge rejections and harp on her and bug her and I know it is wrong when I am doing it but it is like I can't stop.

I don't know why I'm writing here. I could go on and on and on, but I know that no one really has the time to read it. I'm just so confused all the time. So sad. So nothing. Hopefully when my insurance kicks in and I get back on my meds it will be better. I hope so.