Tomato-Hello, you are up late tonight. You have been through alot for a tomato-or even tomato juice for that matter.:) From your recounting of the crane accident I can well understand your feeling that everything is unstable. I felt that way too after going through the biggest quake in SF since the 1906 one. It was really hard to get back on a firm footing. I think your witnessing the crane accident/building explosion though seems more traumatic. It must have brought back alot of 9/11 anxiety as well. Your list of major life stressors is really up there right now -no question. I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your sister- the relationship you had with your sister sounds beautiful. You were very fortunate to have each other. Sounds like you and your sister were two brave peas in a pod. Wearing the pin your sister gave you to chemo is an excellent plan. You just seem to be on the right track with all that you are doing. I am astounded by the presence of mind that you have. I am glad you went to the psych and that you like him -but, if you are not feeling depressed and are not depressed prone then the prozac doesn't make sense to me either. On the other hand, I wonder if an anti anxiety med like xanax may help you from time to time maybe not every day in a routine manner. I can hardly believe I am saying this because I have been very anti med. like you. But, recently my autoimmune disease has gone very unstable and the endo wants to try to get my autoantibodies down by using xanax together with the thyroid med. I expressed all my reservations but I don't want the autoantibodies running completely amok, finding new places to attack. I have tried the lowest dose.25 on a daily each 8 hr. basis and it isn't going to work for me. It made me a couch potato (maybe you would be a couch tomato)and I do not want that-I love my walks (today I walked 11 miles at a nature preserve). So, I have to be able to move and do. I have recently gone to half the lowest dose and that can work it seems. But, what I wanted to mention is that when I had the recent mass found in my neck lymph gland, the u/s and then the ct scan and then the next u/s--it all stressed me so much and the .25 xanax was equivalent to having a glass of wine before the procedure. I would just take the .25 about 45 min. before the procedure and it was so much easier on my system. I am thinking that since you are not depressed, that perhaps when you feel anxious or you are going for a stressful appt. or procedure you could just try a very low dose as I did and it may soothe you . Personally from my experience using xanax before the appts/procedures , the xanax helped alot-really I have to say the .25 was equivalent to one glass of wine and probably a little less of that feeling and it lasted maybe a few hours .I have talked to others who have used xanax on an intermittent basis for med. procedures and it helped them. Let me know if you get the Carolyn McManus cd and find it helpful. I am hoping the best for you dear tomato. Take care.