Discussions that mention prozac

Addiction & Recovery board

I have been addicted to Fioricet since 1997. It started--as all addictions seem to do--innocently enough, when I was in my early 20s. I was being physically abused by my new husband, plus had to deal with his threats, stalking, and his calling my new place of employment--out of the blue--to tell them that, oh, by the way, my wife is on Prozac, did you know that? I was so humiliated that I considered it almost as bad as the beatings (never mind that being with him was the reason I had to start taking Prozac again). I was having nightmare headaches, and a physician wrote a presciption for it, telling me it really helped migraines (the doc did not know of my home life, or he probably wouldn't have prescribed it, given Fioricet's addiction potential and how I now know that abused spouses have a high rate of med/alcohol abuse).

The Fioricet worked. The headaches went away within 20 minutes. They also made me feel euphoric, and sympathetic towards my poor husband (who, you know, just had to lash out at me when he he was passed over for a promotion so he came home from work, screamed and yelled for an hour about how ugly I was, then hit me in the side of the head.)

I also realized that there was something about those early days--the low doses of Fioricet seemed to make me look pretty, which I desperately needed to think after listening to my now ex-husband tell me what a dog I was. My makeup always looked flawless and people would ask what I was doing to my skin and how my eyes were beautiful, they couldn't believe how blue they were, etc. I of course soaked it up like a sponge; I'd like to blame my ex-husband's hurtful comments for wanting to take the med but I've continued to take it since the day I walked out 2 years ago. Plus, what female doesn't want to be told that they are beautiful and thin they are, and, oh my gosh, I've got this great guy who wants to date you, blah, blah, blah? Oh, vanity--what would we do without ye?

The medication was terrific...until it wasn't. I have had horrible diarrhea, fallen down the front steps (no injuries, just hurt like [email protected]!#@ and embarassed me terribly), etc. I have also had to call in absent to work a couple of times because I would take the medication in the evening after work and be too exhausted the next morning to get there. I have never taken Fioricet before, during, or at work, luckily. I was too scared (especially after the falling, the slurred speech my best friend accused me of having, etc). Plus, as a single woman, I can't lose my job.

I am now very frightened. What if my Mother, who is in terrible health, needs me during the night and I am too asleep (it HEAVILY sedates me) to get the phone if she calls? I'm tired of urinating in the bed because I'm so sedated to realize I need to go to the bathroom, tired of hiding out in my house because I don't want anyone to know, tired of not being able to get a quart of milk because I'll never get under the wheel of a car while I'm taking this stupid, stupid, stupid medication. I'm just tired. And I'm furious at myself for slipping into this mess.

Please forgive my bellyaching. This is my own fault and nobody else's, but this is also my story. Is there anyone out there going through a Fioricet nightmare? And is there any way I can get out of this? I'm new to the posts, will do some scanning and see if Fioriceters have posted. Please write, I need some help. And please pray for me. I promise I would do the same for any of you.

Peace and love and health and recovery for us all.