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Re: I give up

Re: I give up

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Posted by julie on May 29, 2000 at 13:51:22:

In Reply to: Re: I give up posted by Leslie on May 29, 2000 at 11:32:34:

: : : I am 34 and have been trying to get pregnant 4years. I had my son at 21 after almost 4 years of trying. I am now married agian and so desprate!Both my sister in law and my neice have babys on the way and I cant stand to look at them. We have tried everything we can afford and all I ve got is 2 misscarages and a etopic.Now 2 years after the etopic pregnancy I dont ovulate, my tampature is still 97.5 on day 22 of my cycle,urine ovlation test look to be possitive almost every day,
: : : i just dont know what to try next.I just feel if I dont at least ovulate,therefore making me feel that there is still a slight chance I will go off the deep end.I just dont want to see the 4th and 5th babys born into my close family,since We have been trying,with out a small ray of hope.Dose any one understand or know how Ican help myslef to ovulate without drugs or shots,been there done that,or prolong my period to last more than 2 days?Any sucess storys?Sorry to sound so bitter but I need to have a Baby so bad!
: : :
: : Dear Leslie,
: : I'm with you on the giving up. Sometimes I think when we try so hard for something, we lose sight of what we already have-people relationships, work, hobbies, other interest, ourselves. I am 32 and most doctors think I don't ovulate. I often feel that I have inflicted this upon myself, as I am a recovered bulimic and deprived my body of what it needed for over 10 years.
: : Currently, I am following a diet plan that includes a diet rich in natural fats such as olive oil, nuts, eggs, soy, and soy products. THis is all based on the philosophy of a Dr. PHil Maffetone (you can research his stuff on the net.) He proposes that when women's hormones are off, or they are having difficulty ovulating, it has to do with an imbalance in your fats, therefore causing an imbalance in your hormones. At first I thought it was a bunch of crap but as I read his book, IN Fitness and in health, it made since to me. I have only been following the diet recommendations for two months but I feel great. I am also using a cream that is supposed to boost estrogen, called Ostaderm. No period yet but I have actually felt like I ovulated.
: : I've been trying for two years since going off the pill. I've had one period on my own. One with Provera and twice I did not respond to PRovera. I did not respond to two trials of Clomid. My regular Ob gyn does not know what to do. The "infertility specialist" want me to take shots. (Uh, no.)
: : So, in conclusion, give up but don't give up on yourself. Enjoy what you have, who you love, and love yourself. Do what makes you happy. Relax and Pray. Children are great, I'm sure but you are still a wonderful human being without another.
: : You can email me anytime.
: : Julie
: Julie;Thanks,your right!Its just real hard when everyone else is on their 2nd or 3rd in only 4 years!My husband is 7 years younger than me and I feel like Iam keeping him from having his own child!I see the way he looks at all the babys born into the family,and even the way he looks at pregnant women!I just feel like a looser.its not his fault,Iam not mad at him.Agian thanks I think your best advice is PRAY! LESLIE

Dear Leslie,
I can absolutely relate. I am not exaggerating when I say that at least ten of my friend within the past two years have had one, two, and three babies each. One thing that really started helping me let go was I saw a friend that I had not seen in a while. She is now 45. She was actually a student in one of my aerobics/weight lifting classes. (I do that on the side.) She had stopped coming for about six months and I ran into at a conference. She was 8 months pregnant!!!! SHe had been trying for ten years, at least. She finally decided to stop trying and accept that she would not have a child. She took a long vacation to Germany in july of 99 and came back in Sept. and got pregnant!! THe doctor (the same specialist I saw) told her she had a 1% chance and that she should just get a donor egg.
Anyway, talk to your husband and tell him exactly how you feel. Then talk some more, be open and honest with yourself and then like you said, PRAY some more. My husband always tells me when I get down that he married me for me, not my ability to produce a baby and that my health is the most important thing.
MUCH CARE and Concern to you and I will pray for you too.

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