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Re: Need Opinion - dealing with best friend's pregnancy

Re: Need Opinion - dealing with best friend's pregnancy

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Posted by Patricia on July 30, 2000 at 14:39:44:

In Reply to: Need Opinion - dealing with best friend's pregnancy posted by Marie on July 28, 2000 at 20:36:02:

: Hello all,

: I need to know if I am being totally selfish. My best friend is expecting in about a month. Back when she found out, she didn't even want to tell me because she felt so guilty. Four months and bam. Me on the other hand... ttc for over 2 years. Anyway, this is the dilema. She wants to know if I want to be called to go to the hospital when she goes into labor. My husband thinks we have to do it - that's the "friend" thing to do and that I'm being a bad friend if I don't. I just don't know if I can handle it. I want to be there, but emotionally I'm not sure I can do it. I'm really trying to show an interest in her pregnancy, but it's so hard to ask her questions (wishing it were me, too!). What do you think? Am I wrong?

: My husband is great, but he doesn't completely understand the emotional turmoil a woman goes through in this situation. Any opinions from you women who are going through the same? Thanks!

I know what you are going through. My best friend for twenty years got pregnant at a time I had been trying for so long to get pregnant. She used to get mad that I would not ask about her pregnancy every time we spoke. I explained to her how hard it was for me. I thought she understood. I tried to be there but it was hard. When she had the baby I sent a gift ( we live in different cities) and sent a birthday card and gift on the baby's first birthday. But she decided not to speak to me anymore. I was devastated because I thought she understood what I was going through and that I wad trying to be there for her but I guess she didi not want to be a friend to me. I think that if your friend is a true friend she will understand that you don't want to go to the hospital but you will visit afterwards.
If she cares about you she will understand.

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